Worst of the Worst

Aaron Brown posted this on his blog so I'll post it hear since I like being warned to not waste my time watching crappy movies. I'm certainly glad that I haven't seen most of the movies on this list. I have no doubts that I could come up with my own list of top 100 awful movies, which I wasted my life watching. That has to be one of the things I hate the most, watching a movie hoping that it's good and by the end you say, "I could have been doing something productive with that time, like putting a puzzle together or call and actually talk to someone." Time is a gift and we shouldn't be wasting it on crappy movies. Although there's no way to be certain which movies will turn out lame even though some are a little more obvious than others. So I suggest taking a look at this list and seeing the directors and production companies that have multiple movies on this list and avoid these companies in the future. Deal? Deal.

This list was made by Rottentomatoes.

Is anything starring Vin Diesel ever good? Early in the decade there were more of his films on the list but since producers are intent on making their dung hill higher this is the only movie that made the list. I think it's safe to say that if Vin is in it you should take a pass.










I never really understood why people think that Dane Cook is funny. I think that Bryan is funnier. Now that's saying something. I'm starting to get tired of people getting by simply on name recognition.




I remember seeing the trailer for this movie on TV and thought it was going to come out on TNT as an "original movie." Then when the trailer ended and showed the release date at the theaters, I thought, "there's no way that's a real movie." It looked a film major's senior project. If the film looks low-budget that's never a good sign. And this movie was "straight out of lo-cash."






I'm certainly glad that these mockumentaries made the list. For the life of me I don't know how production companies get away with making half-baked movies over and over and over again. The script of these movies must of taken about twenty minutes to write.



It doesn't take a lot of thought to put these movies together. I understand that they market these movies to Middle Schoolers but I teach my Middle Schoolers better than that. I tell them that producers don't think very highly of them when they keep trying to feed them the same crap rapped in a different package. That's my way of educating the youth and sticking it to The man.




Hopefully my students will actually remember what I taught them and stop paying for these dumb movies so they can stop making them.






Knowing didn't make the list. This doesn't imply that it wasn't bad but there are THAT many movies that are even more awful than this one. Now that's really sad.









Here's another movie that didn't make the list. My wife and I went to go see this movie. I thought to myself, "I like funny people and the title is 'Funny People' so it must be funny." Well, the logic didn't follow or the humor. The wife and I were a little late and sat down at the back in the middle of a scene. From the time we opened the door to finding a seat we must of heard about seventeen F-bombs and a host of crass and degrading language by men towards a particular woman. We walked out immediately and kindly asked for our money back. I was pretty offended, not so much with the language but with the fact that the producers of this movie thinks I would enjoy such base humor. Really? I am a grown man now, if I wanted to watch other grown men act like they're still in Middle School I would just go hang out with Bryan.




I rented this movie thinking that it couldn't be bad because it had Brat Pitt in it. Wrong again. Even though there are amazing stars out there, every single one of them has a flop here and there. The story was slow in developing and the editing was completely incoherent. I didn't even finish watching it. So even a great actor like Brat Pitt is in a movie that does not guarantee quality.



Well, it's time for bed so I'll just let you finish the list on your own and make your own comments. Believe me, there are plenty of movies to bag on, sadly. I'm certainly not looking forward to the next decade of movie making. There will come a point where there be nothing to rent as well. I guess I better learn how to read.