Communal Life Stage

Going through different life stages is a part of growing up. Some people take each life stage in stride. Others may fight each stage tool and nail because of the growing pressures and responsibilities they may want to avoid. I was in the latter category for quite some time until I just finally embraced the necessity for maturity. Da** it!!! No, I'm not bitter. Okay, maybe a little.

One of the earth shaking experiences was becoming a father. It certainly changed my view on parenthood. At least some of those views anyway. But I'm not here to talk about me. Recently my dear friend, Aaron Brown, just became a father.

Aaron and his wife Megan had a rough labor. I could totally relate. By the grace of God, they got through it and Eliot Christopher Brown was born. Even though Aaron don't talk quite as often as before he's no less a brother to me today than he was when we went to Biola University together. I remember being there for his wedding and giving a wedding speech he really appreciated. I remember when he was here for my wedding. He's been one of the most supportive friends I've ever been blessed with. He's offered me wisdom and counsel that was directly empowered by the Spirit of God.

As the due date came closer and closer Aaron would ask me questions on what it's like being a father. We have completely different backgrounds growing up so I could only offer my subjective experience on the matter. I told him how much it changed me. I told him how important it was for me to tuck in my daughter when it's bedtime and how it's amazing when they begin to recognize you as their father. There's also the absolute terror in a parent's heart when something could be wrong with your child. And of course, we'll have those "Shrek 4 Days."

I know Aaron will have his own experiences and process things his way. Even though we live in different coasts I know his journey through fatherhood will enrich me as much as his friendship has. That's why I'm really excited. It's more than just "joining a club" but a deeper level of intimacy within the communal life. I know we'll have long phone conversations processing through different concepts and ideas and help each other articulate our thoughts and emotions, just like when we went to college talking about classes and relationships. Now, we get to talk about our children. They'll be heartache and pain. There always are in parenthood. But I feel empowered having another brother in arms helping me fight the battle of being a good father.

Hey Aaron, welcome to the club.