The Days of Shrek 4 Past

I enjoyed the Shrek series. The best one (in my humble opinion) was the first one. The third one was the weakest installment, but the fourth one was surprisingly fun because it touches on a theme that I believe most men go through but rarely ever admit to it. Why am I even mentioning this? As I continue to blog, there are phrases I hope to embed with meaning so that I can use them regularly and not have to spend time explaining what the phrase means. So, my first submission for this endeavor is the phrase “Shrek 4.” I am hoping that after reading this blog, when I say, “I’m having a Shrek 4 day” or “It’s a Shrek 4 moment,” you’ll know exactly what I mean.

First let me explain the meaning of Shrek 4. It’s basically the premise of the movie, which is here:

In the present, Shrek has steadily grown tired of being a family man and celebrity among the local villagers, leading him to yearn for the days when he felt like a "real ogre". He takes his family to Far Far Away to celebrate his children's first birthday. Shrek gets annoyed when the three little pigs eat the kids' cake along with most of the other party food. A boy named Butterpants (who is said to be a "big fan" of Shrek) demands that Shrek roar. After he lets out a frustrated roar the entire crowd cheers, reinforcing his belief that no one considers him to be a true ogre. This coupled with the fact that the birthday cakes were decorated with a "cute" Ogre named "Sprinkles" finally makes Shrek snap and he smashes the new birthday cake in front of everyone, and then walks out in anger. He and Fiona argue outside about his reaction, which ends with Shrek rashly agreeing that he was happier before he'd rescued her.

Of course the term “real ogre” is an allegory of a “real man.” Being “domesticated” can feel somewhat neutering. Let me be clear, I’m not about to use worldly and secular ideas to define masculinity. But on the surface there are some legitimate things we can glean from the basic premise of the movie. Another disclaimer I would like to add is that even though I have “Shrek 4 moments,” it does not mean I don’t want to be married or be a family man. I love my wife and child. Okay? Okay.

When I was single there were tons of things I enjoyed. For instance, there was the freedom to basically do whatever I wanted when I wanted to do it, which is not always a good thing. Also, I didn’t have to worry about being a “Spiritual Leader” in the home because, well, I didn’t have a home or a family to worry about. I went to church weekly, read my Bible daily, and made sure I spent a portion of the day praying. Spiritual disciplines came easy because I wasn’t on a schedule. I got to it when I got to it.

Now that I have a full time job, a boatload of bills, and a wife and child to look after, things are not quite so easy. Do I sometimes long for the days of being a “real ogre?” I’d be lying if I said, “no” but the emphasis is on sometimes. If you did see Shrek 4 you’ll remember by the end of the movie [Spoiler Alert]: Shrek realizes he wouldn’t trade the family life for anything [End Spoiler]. Yes, there are moments we go through wishing we could “just hang out with the guys” or just have time to ourselves. But at the end of the day, there’s nothing that beats coming home to a family. It’s a different level of enjoyment. For example, when you were a kid you thought spinning around in circles and getting yourself dizzy was the best thing ever. When you get older, you realize there are other enjoyments in life that pale in comparison. Imagine seeing a 30-yr-old spinning around in circles in order to get himself dizzy and crying out “Wee, wee, weeeeeeeeeeee!” There are two questions that would come to mind. First would be questioning the guy’s competency. The second question I can’t put in this blog, but you get the picture.

There are more mature enjoyments in life. The challenge becomes in redefining what a “real ogre” is. So what if I can’t devote myself to becoming a better basketball player? So what if I have less time to goof off? Yes, more responsibilities tend to add stress and pressure, but these are good things. Admittedly, too much of stress and pressure can drive you over the edge. That’s why we should allow a little time to ourselves in order to “hang out” and let our hair down. Yes, I get stressed out with the responsibilities of being a family man and sometimes long for the days of Shrek 1. But just like at the end of Shrek 4, family is really what matters.