Route 66

This past month my mom would’ve turned 66 years old. Truthfully, I don’t visit my mother’s gravesite that often but I think about her all the time. My thoughts about my mom haven’t lessened over the years. On the contrary, they’ve only grown as I enter into different life stages. As you get older, your appreciation for your parents grows, but when you start having your own children the appreciation takes a leap to a whole other level. You think to yourself, “How did they ever do this?” I certainly feel that way, and my baby girl is only four months old. Plus, my wife does most of the work.

When my mom first went home to be with the Lord, I never really gave much thought to the question, “I wonder if she knows what’s going on here on earth?” because she was in the presence of Jesus and probably didn’t care. As more time passes, I do wonder about that question more and more. Specifically, I think to myself, “I wonder if she knows I’m a teacher?” because that’s the career she always wanted for me. “I wonder if she knows I married someone she would absolutely love?” “I wonder if she knows I have a child?” “I wonder if she knows the Lakers got Dwight Howard?” “Would she be mad we didn’t hire Phil Jackson?” Yes. These are the things I think more about as time passes.

Upon reflection, I can only conclude that you can never show your parents enough appreciation. There’s a limited amount of time we have but we don’t live that way. We often live in a way where we think there’s an eternity before our “due date” so we put things off and approach life with the “I’ll get to that later” mentality. It’s just in our nature to procrastinate. Why do you think we are most productive when we have deadlines and the least productive when we have the most time? We’re always complaining about not having enough time. Enough time for what exactly? When we desire “more time” it usually doesn’t involve deepening our relationships. It usually means more time to get more stuff done. When was the last time we thought, “I should call my parents and let them know how much I love them just because”? How much do you think that would mean to your parents? How much do you think that would mean to you if your child called you in their adult years and voiced their love and appreciation?

My mom spent her time praying for everyone she could. She prayed for others to come to know Christ, especially Thai people. She prayed I would find a wife and called me practically every day to see if I had made progress. She spent time serving her community, drove around and picked people up for Bible study, and attended church several times a week. She sure was an example to me.

Recently, I’ve been thinking how she would be as a grandmother to Joelle. My mom would probably be over the house every day until eventually I would have to tell her to stop coming or I’d let the dog loose on her. Without fail, every time she would visit, she would come bearing gifts for little Joelle to the point where I would become jealous and start demanding she buy me a new pair of Kobe(s).

Often, when I reflect on my relationship with my mom, I do have some regrets. I wish I showed her how much I felt loved by her. Aren’t that what most parents want for their children, that their children know they’re loved? The wonderful life I have now is all God’s doing but my mom was the vehicle by which He chose to bless me. She sacrificed much of her life in order for my sister and me to have a better life, but she never saw the fruit of her labor in the form of our current families. She would absolutely love being a grandma and even happier undoing the discipline we teach our kids by spoiling them rotten. Even though I can’t tell or show her how much I appreciated everything she had done for me, the least I can do is to provide the same kind of love and care for my family. I’m sure that’s what she would’ve wanted.

A Night At The Staples Center

November 27, 1916 was Chick Hearn’s birthday. If you don’t know who Chick was click here.
Basically, he was a legend. For us old-timers who grew up listening to him announce Laker games, it’s still a little weird to not hear his voice during Laker games. Last night at the game, the Laker organization decided to honor him by passing out bobbleheads of Chick (it’s my first bobblehead).

No matter how many games I attend, I walk up to the entrance at the Staples Center with eager anticipation. I already know how they do the introduction of the starting lineup but I hate missing it and want to see every time. Okay, so we lost the game to a Pacers team missing one of their best players (Danny Granger). Kobe had the flu but found the strength to drop 40pts and grab 10 rebounds and we still lost. The lost makes us 7-8 and Laker Nation, in typical fashion, is freaked out and demanding Pau Gasol be traded to improve the team. I just feel a need to address Laker Nation with our team’s current state (especially for you who have a cable company that hasn’t struck a deal with Time Warner Cable yet).

Yes the team looked awful last night and has looked awful overall in this first month of the season. The expectations were high when we got Dwight Howard and Steve Nash during the summer for a broken Bynum and some measly draft picks we never use anyway. So let me address some things to help calm down my fellow Laker brethren.

The Bench

The bench is awful!!! Or at least that’s what everyone has been saying. I get it. They’re an easy target for the media and the fans. But let’s take a closer look.

Jodie Meeks was signed to provide some outside shooting but currently has an atrocious PER of 7.31 (the league average is 15) and is only shooting 31% from the field overall. Last night he came in the 2nd quarter and played a measly 3 minutes and they ran zero plays for him. Why are you going to bring in a shooter and not try to get him some shots? D’Antoni started playing Meeks with Kobe in order to open up more shots for him, which was working. However, what happens when Kobe needs to sit and Meeks takes his place? If you don’t run plays for him or set some screens he’s not going to do much for you offensively. Furthermore, if you’re playing him 3 minutes at a time you’re not building his conference much either. Meeks will be fine once Nash gets back because they’ll be another play-making guard on the floor at all times whether it’s Kobe or Nash. In addition, we’re going to need him if we’re going to make a run in the playoffs so it’s imperative we get him going and Nash will do that.

Jordan Hill is a high-energy guy who is quietly having a solid season. He’s far and away our best bench player. Hill rebounds like crazy and can make short-range Js. I would’ve loved if we kept Matt Barns and have those two play the 3 and 4 for our 2nd unit and just bring monster energy because we are sorely lacking in that department. Yet D’Antoni doesn’t play him much because Hill fell out of favor with him while they were in New York. D’Antoni needs to get over it and I believe he will.

Antawn Jamison – much was made about signing Jamison because “We finally have some bench scoring!” Truthfully, I didn’t expect much from him this year. Sure he had a couple of great games in Memphis and at Dallas. But too much was made about him averaging 17pts per game last year in Cleveland. He played 33 minutes per game on a crappy team jacking up 16 shot attempts per game but only shooting 40% from the field overall. There’s no way he’s getting that type of playing time here and he’ll be lucky to get 16 shot attempts in a month with Kobe/Dwight/Pau on the team. It’s also strange both Mike Brown and D’Antoni play him at the 3 instead of using him as a stretch-4. The two games against Memphis and Dallas last week he shot a sizzling 63% from the field and averaged 17.5 pts and 11 rebounds. Did you know what position he played? You guessed it . . . stretch-4. This isn’t rocket science.

Darius Morris is a nice young player. You might look at his awful PER 8.43 and simply write him off. Yes, he’s done some foolish things on the court. Here’s the different between using Morris as the back-up PG instead of Steve Blake when Nash gets back. With young players they’re going to make mistakes but they’ll learn from it and get better. Confidence is always the key for young players. Steve Blake is who he is. When he makes a mistake he’s not going to improve from it. He’s already hit ceiling as a player and is already declining. Why not let the young guy develop? He’s already a better defender than Blake and we could use some youth on this team.

Pau Gasol

Laker Nation wants him traded (what else is new?). It’s been recent revealed Pau has been playing with tendinitis in both knees thanks to Mike Brown's long practices. If you’ve ever had tendinitis anywhere on your body you know it’s painful. This explains his lack of aggression on the court. If you watch him run you could see it’s painful for him. I’m not making excuses for him it’s just a reality of his physical condition. While D’Antoni was in New York he drove Amar’e Stoudemire to the ground so I’m a little worried he’ll do the same with the starters here in LA.

I love Pau. He helped us win two titles. I know he’s one of the most talented big-man in the league, which makes his inconsistent play maddening. But I’m not ready to trade him. Before thinking about that I would consider moving him to the bench as a back-up center. He can’t guard stretch-4(s) and the league is filled with them now. Pau needs the ball in the post and it’s frustrating watching one of the best post players tip-toeing around the perimeter wondering what to do and jacking up 3s because, well, that’s all he could do.

If he were to come off the bench as a back-up center we could play the offense through him and he could get it in the post, which does 3 things for us. First, Pau will be more effective getting the ball closer to the basket. He’s not getting it in the post with Dwight on the floor. Second, he would strengthen the bench and open up everything for everyone else, Meeks would benefit from this. Finally, reducing Pau’s minutes would allow him to heal and keep him fresh for the playoffs. Furthermore, what back-up center in this league could contend with Pau? I’m not ready to trade him. What are we going to get back anyway? He still has $38.3M left on his contract. Who’s taking him?

Of course the media will make it look like a demotion but Pau shouldn’t take it that way. He’d be free to play more to his strengths instead of being exploded for his weaknesses.

Conclusion

There are some legitimate concerns with the team. We still have to wash the Mike Brown stench off of us. I’m also worried about D’Antoni is playing the starters way too many minutes and his inability to think outside the box (moving Pau to the bench, playing Jordan Hill more, not playing Jamison at the 3, etc). But overall, the season doesn’t really start until we get Nash back. I could totally see us have a 17-3 run over 20 games late in the season to grab the #2 seed in the West. Will we win the title? That’s still a question mark but despite the current state of the team, I’m confident will finish the season with a better product that's currently on the floor.

Becky’s Wedding

So Becky got married. I don’t believe it either. It’s not because she’s unattractive. On the contrary, she’s a shorter version of my gorgeous wife. There are two things I just want to point out. First, to me, Becky didn’t seem ready for a commitment like marriage. Before she started dating her husband, Josiah, she had been in a short relationship. People get in and out of relationships all the time, so that’s not a big deal. However, the issue with this particular relationship was that you could smell the stench of horse feces off of this guy a mile away, and she didn’t pick up on it. In her defense, none of the other family members did either. Maybe it was because he was white and white people just trust other white people. Whatever. (Also in her defense, she wasn’t the first person, nor will she be the last, to have one of those, “what was I thinking?” relationships- myself included).

Second, I was the only person who called the guy’s bluff. You know the thing that makes Becky really upset? It wasn’t about the relationship not working out, but that I was absolutely right from day one. It burns her, and I enjoy that.

So you could imagine when she started dating Josiah about 20 minutes after her relationship ended with this “other guy,” I naturally had some reservations. Interestingly enough, he was also white. And you know what? That’s right, you guessed it; the family immediately embraced him. Did anyone ask for my opinion? Of course not, I’ve only had a 100% track record. So what do I know?

I don’t know Josiah all that well, but I did have one conversation with him. And you know what? That’s all it took for him to earn my approval (not that anyone was asking for it). The conversation was in stark contrast when compared to the “other guy.” I saw genuine character in both what he was communicating and the way in which he was communicating it. He had clear purpose about what he wanted to do with his life and articulated his vision like a man who actually had given it some thought. The conversation was pleasant and refreshing. As long as he remembers he’s son-in-law #2 things should be fine.

Fast forward to the wedding day: Josiah and Becky decided to have their wedding reception the same place we had our wedding. I remember it like it was yesterday. My wife and I had a nice swing dancing routine for our first dance because we didn’t want the 7-minute slow song hug that starts getting awkward after 2-mintues. Each of my groomsmen gave an excellent speech, and Becky had an epic emotional meltdown before anyone even handed her the microphone. It was good memories all around.

Now I’m sitting at my table enjoying the moment holding my baby girl while I watch my wife give the wedding toast (she did an excellent job). Then it hits me, I have a child and my wife’s little sister is becoming a woman right before my eyes. All of these memories of Becky start flooding into my mind. Like the first time I picked up Katie for a date and saw Becky who basically looked like a smaller version of Katie with braces and the raspy voice of person whose been smoking for 40 years. I also thought of all the immature rants and emotional meltdowns that didn’t involve having to give a wedding speech. I remember hearing all her complaints about things that were insignificant and wondering if she would ever “get it.”

Flashing back to my table at the reception: Becky was a beautiful bride and looked like the woman she had grown into. My in-laws never had a doubt she would someday “get it.” Maybe that’s the kind of unconditional love and patience I’ll need to give my daughter. Maybe kids from strong Christian families should be given the same amount of grace as those who grew up in broken homes. Maybe maturity can’t be rushed but only nurtured, like it was for me. Maybe there’s a lesson in all of this for me.

Anyway, there is a sense of excitement I feel for my sister-in-law. There’s also a genuine happiness that she found a good man (even though nobody asked for my opinion). Perhaps the most exciting aspect of it all… She’s going to be stationed in Japan for 3 years and the prospect of Becky in a foreign country should give way to plenty of source material for comedic relief.