Jammer's Blog

The Jammer - 01.24.12

2012-01-24T18:13:00.000-08:00

I’m starting a series called The Jammer, which will point out up and coming movies and whatever I find interesting in the news. Hope you readers enjoy and comments are always appreciated.

Upcoming Movies

The Grey

In Alaska, a plane crashes in the wild leaving several oil workers stranded and fighting for their lives against the elements and a pack of hungry wolves. Liam Neeson vs. a pack of hungry wolves? I’m sold. I was pleasantly surprised with his action chops in Taken and wouldn’t mind if he turned his @$$kicking ways to a bunch of wolves. At the end of the trailer you see Neeson look at a wolf, strap mini broken bottles to his knuckles, and run head first towards the animal. Ballsy! What’s not to like?

Project X

Anytime Hollywood could exploit youthful ignorance it will pounce like a cheetah on cocaine. Here’s film without much of a story and completely void of substance but relying on totally on a bunch of teenagers acting like jackasses on jackass steroids. And you know what? This movie is going to make a lot of $$$. After this movie comes out how many idiot teenagers are going to think behaving recklessly is “cool?” And popularity among peers is the chief end of all mankind? Thanks Hollywood for continuing to poison our youth and making every effort to steer them towards hell in the name of making a profit.

I don't even want to link the trailer but if you really want to see it here it is.

Interesting News

I realize I’m a little late with this bit of news but I just found out that Starbucks would begin serving beer and wine. They already started in Seattle and will begin at select Southern California stores.

My mom owned a 7-11 for as long as I could remember. My sister, Vicky, took over the store, located in East Los Angeles, after she passed away. I could tell you serving alcohol doesn’t bring in the classiest of customers. I’m not saying people who purchase alcohol are gangsters and thugs. But what I am saying gangsters and thugs purchase alcohol. If your customer base is typically the working middle class who enjoy coffee and/or students who enjoy studying at a Starbucks, why in the world are you going to attempt to reach a demographic that could cause tension? Because, you know, college students enjoy studying with a bunch of cholo(s). Is Starbucks going to refer the 40oz Old English as the “Double Venti OE?” I moved out of East Los Angeles in order to get away from that demographic.

That’s it for today. Leave your comments on the topics mentioned above. I would love to hear your opinion. Should Starbucks start serving alcohol? Should there be an episode of Man vs. Wild where Bear Grylls shows us how to fight off a pack of wolves?

The Wedding Diary

2012-01-21T13:16:00.000-08:00

It’s been three wonderful years since I’ve married the most beautiful woman in the world. It only recently dawned on me that I’ve never written my intended Wedding Diary. I probably got caught up doing something unimportant. Anyway, if you ever wanted to walk through with me on my wedding day here it is.

All of the guys stayed over at my house. The night before we were partying like rock stars, drinking up a storm. Not really, we went laser tagging in Fullerton. I won, of course. The theme of the wedding was “Worship the Lord with reverence and rejoice with trembling” (Ps 2:11 – emphasis added).

We wanted to rejoice because marriage is a God honoring institution reflecting the beautiful relationship between Christ and the church. However, it’s essential to tremble with reverence and not act like a bunch of juveniles in the process, something that could easily happen with my friends and I.

9:00am – Breakfast with the groomsmen

The groomsmen and I decided to go to IHOP. We feasted and I had about seven cups of coffee. My buddy Aaron took charge and asked each of the guys to impart some words of encouragement. After a couple of jokes and gregarious laughter, which nearly caused a scene at the restaurant, my buddy Bryan (of all people), changed the tone from lighthearted to dead serious by sharing some of the most transparent and personal things in his own life while becoming greatly emotional. He shared his personal struggles in his own marriage and encouraged me to avoid certain pitfalls. Then everyone else joined in and started giving me wise counsel.

I’ll never forget that morning with my guys. All of their uniqueness and why I love each one of them were on full display. I knew this day would go beyond my wife and myself. Several people would be touched, challenged, and changed.

10:30am – Getting ready to get ready

After a rather sobering morning we headed back to the house in order to clean up and made sure we had everything we needed for the big day. While cleaning up a massive pillow fight broke out and slowed the process considerably. If you know anything about guy-pillow-fights you’ll know it usually doesn’t end without a wrestling match breaking out and maybe a couple of drop kicks. This was no exception.

1:00pm – Pictures at the park

We managed to act responsible just enough to clean up and put on our tuxes. We even got the park on time in order to take pictures. Katie and I decided to take our pictures before the ceremony in order to have the reception immediately following the wedding. I enjoy quick transitions at weddings instead of the few hours of lag time in between. Once we arrived at the park, I saw Katie in her dress from a distance, walking slowly towards me (I’m getting emotional just writing this). We had a moment to ourselves and I felt like I was dreaming. I thought to myself, “Is this angelic gorgeous white girl really going to marry me?”

Shortly after nearly falling apart at the sight of my bride we actually started taking pictures. We went through the usual routine of taking wedding pictures. (I’m supposed to leave out the part where Katie tripped and fell during the picture taking time. It was on a steep hill and she was in a wedding dress and wedding dresses are notorious for making a girl completely immobile. So this is me not mentioning that part.)

Side note: When the wedding photos were developed all of us noticed Bryan’s head looked absolutely colossal in EVERY SINGLE PICTURE. To this day he’s convinced our photographer photo-shopped his head. Whatever the case, his head overshadowed our pictures because it truly does jump out at you.

1:30pm – meeting at the church

The guys and I went to the church where the ceremony was being held and had lunch together. We carefully made sure we didn’t get anything on our tuxes and spent some time in prayer. There were a few more jokes and we were off.

3:00pm – The ceremony

Dr. Thoennes, my pastor, professor, mentor, and close friend, who was performing the ceremony, came and got me. I walked my sister up to the front row and went around with Dr. Thoennes to the back door as the seating of the family continued. Before we walked through the door and onto the stage, he gave me a big hug and I told him, “We’ve been through a lot.” (This could be an entire blog in itself)

As we walked through the doors, the processional began. Dr. Thoennes gave one of the best sermons on marriage I’ve ever heard. He mentioned all of the things we’ve been through, all the times I complained about being single and how the girls at Biola were racist. He mentioned my mom and how wonderful she was. I pretty much lost it there. He even had Katie and I turn around and look out at the crowd and take that moment in. He pointed out that the next time we would see all these same people gathered together we’d probably be at one of our funerals.

4:00pm – Off to the reception

At the reception site, the wedding party was introduced first and then finally my wife and I were introduced. I walked out like I was in the starting lineup of the Lakers giving out fist-pumps and high-fives.

Immediately afterwards, we had our first dance. Katie and I had taken Swing-dancing lessons, not so much for the wedding but for fun. We also didn’t like the 7-minute slow song and awkward stare into each other’s face while everyone was looking at us. And if you know me at all, I never like to do things like that in conventional ways. So yes, we rocked the house by taking in the moment and swing danced to our soul’s delight. It was fun and people seemed to enjoy it as well.

Once we finished our first dance we walked to the wedding party table where several people were trying to calm down Becky (sister-in-law). I turned to Katie and said, “What’s wrong with your sister she looks like a train wreck?” Katie replied, “I don’t know.” Well then, this was going to be interesting. The groomsmen began their wedding speeches. I already wrote about that HERE.

When the guys were done giving their speeches the microphone was handed off to Becky who proceeded to have a complete meltdown of epic proportion. Hey, she was only a teenager giving her first wedding speech following a bunch of grown men with graduate degrees who just finished giving their speeches. So we’ll cut her some slack, although the epic meltdown is still absolutely hilarious. If I could describe it, it sounded like a small child completely sobbing trying to explain a situation to their parents but being unable to collect their thoughts in order to do so because of their unstable emotional state- all in a voice of a wounded walrus. That sounds about right. I love my sister-in-law. I always remind her to just chalk it up as “life experience.” Besides, it was probably more memorable that she completely crashed and burned than if she were to actually say something coherent and cliche.

My new father-in-law came up to the table and they handed him the microphone. He was supposed to pray for the food but couldn’t bring the microphone to his mouth without almost losing it. He’ll deny this but we have video footage. I guess getting emotional runs in the family.

We feasted. There was some more dancing, meeting and greeting the tables, and we enjoyed some sticky rice and mango for dessert. Yes, I’m Thai. There was some more joking between the guys and I, a lot of hugging, and what would the night be without bagging on Bryan a little (or a lot).

7:00pm – The send off

Everyone lined up and made a lane for his as we walked off into the sunset. Actually, Dr. Thoennes forgot to sign the marriage license so we had to drop by his house to get that done. Once we got to his house we chatted for a while reflecting on the day and how we were feeling. He wanted to mail the marriage license for us so we didn’t have to worry about it. Furthermore, he was going to stay up and pray for us the rest of the night. I just marvel at the amazing leaders God has put in my life.

Then we were off . . . well . . . you know the rest.

Happy Anniversary to my lovely wife of three wonderful years!!!

Holiday Cheer 2011

2012-01-07T10:39:00.000-08:00

With another Holiday Season tucked under our belts we’re ready to get back to our regular scheduled programming. At least I am. But before we get back to the swing of things, it’s time for my annual Holiday Cheer blog in which I reflect on the holiday season.

I’ve already mentioned my exciting for Christmas shopping this year. On Christmas Eve we went to Katie’s grandparent’s house and partied like rock stars. Well, not really but we still had a good time of just hanging out. Grandpa Murphy is well into his 90’s and it wouldn’t be crude of me to think he could count the number of Christmas’ he has left on his hand(s). Despite this he is extremely coherent and often joyful no matter the occasion. It’s inspiring in so many ways. He’s close to glory and appreciates the things he should be appreciating and spends time doing what he needs to be doing.

Pop (aka The Chief) asked me to give the family devotional so I spent a couple of days reflecting on The Virgin Birth of Christ and gave my thoughts on it. The family seemed to appreciate it. I tried to keep it condensed and not give an entire Old Testament Survey class in one sitting like Alan did one year or go gangbusters and give a twenty-seven-point sermon like PJ did another year. I wanted to be concise and memorable (at least that’s what I’ll tell you but the real reason is I’m just too lazy to dig up more content).

The interesting part this year was that Christmas landed on a Sunday. Listening to Mom & Pop try and workout the Christmas Day schedule was hilarious in it of itself.

Mom: What time do you want to have breakfast?
Pop: How about 7am?
Jon: (giving a look that says, “I’m not waking up that early!”)
Mom: Did you want to do stockings before church or after?
Pop: Before.
Me: Breakfast AND stockings BEFORE church? That sounds ambitious and optimistic.
Mom: You’re right. (Turning to Pop): Are you sure you want to do all that before church?
Pop: (doesn’t say anything but gives the look, “I know what I’m doing. I’m the Chief.”
Mom: (picking up on the look) Okay then. We’ll do breakfast and stockings before church. After church we’ll do gifts.
Me: I don’t care I just want to watch basketball.
Mom: I don’t care that you don’t care.
Jon: So when’s breakfast again?
Mom: 7am
Jon: (same “I’m not waking up that early” look on his face)

To my amazement, we actually pulled it off. We were able to eat breakfast, pass out stockings, and I was able to catch some of the Knicks/Celtics game all before church.

Once we got to church Pop, Jon, and I were able to help out Uncle Tim and Aunt Sarah by setting up the overflow room before service. I thought to myself, “Hey, a family serving at church together! Wow, white people DO have it good!” The church decided to keep the doors close and only open them right before service. So we were all in the hallway looking like a bunch of Black Friday shoppers waiting to buy cheap TV(s).

It was a great time of singing holiday Christ-centered songs with the church family. The sermon was an expansion of the devotional I gave the night before. I thought the pastor stole my notes. Whatever. All glory to God in the Highest!

After church we got home and started opening up gifts, sticking right with the schedule Pop came up with the night before. To change things up a bit, Mom wanted the oldest person opening up gifts first this year instead of the usual youngest starting things out. I didn’t care; I knew all my basketball games were humming on the DVR just waiting for me.

Grandpa Davis started the festivities by opening up his gifts first. We went in order according to age while everyone sitting around eagerly waited for the surprises before them. It was fun just to watch others open gifts. It was a blessing to be able to take joy in someone else’s joy and to do it especially in a family context. It took a while to clean up the wrapping paper and put the gifts away. Even though we do this every year it’s memorable each and every year in it’s own unique way. I was so filled with joy and just taking in the moment I even handled the Lakers throwing away the game pretty well (relatively speaking). That’s three straight Christmas Day loses you jack@$$es!!!

We continued throughout the day eating, playing games, and partying like a bunch of dwarves on Middle Earth. Good times all around. This is a far cry from the holidays I grew up with. But God turns “ashes into beauty” and takes the traditions of men to use for His glory.

Happy New Year.

Christmas Devotional – 2011

2012-01-06T00:04:00.000-08:00

I realize this is late but I was busy. Besides, this is my blog and I have no deadlines. Enjoy.

During the holiday season we often think about family gatherings, shopping for gifts, and spending some time at church. While at church, we’re reminded of the “reason for the season,” namely, the virgin birth of Jesus Christ. During this time of year, what’s often overlooked in the birth of Christ is the “virgin” part. We could talk historically of how it was difficult for Mary and Joseph to reconcile this difficult concept or how fellow villagers would’ve started gossiping about the idea of a “virgin” becoming pregnant. Those things are clearly important to have us understand the setting of the narrative, historically speaking. But I want to focus on the bigger theological picture of what “The virgin birth of Christ” means to us today.

It was impossible for a woman to become pregnant without sexual intercourse. During the time of Mary and Joseph they didn’t have artificial insemination. This clearly was an act of God. “The virgin birth of Christ is an unmistakable reminder that salvation can never come through human effort, but must be the work of God himself.” The virgin birth was a symbol of God’s plan for salvation.

“But when the fullness of time came, God sent forth his son, born of a woman, born under the law that he might redeem them that were under the law, that we might receive the adoption of sons” (Gal. 4:4-5).

If we go back even further to the Old Testament in the days of Micah the prophet:

But you, Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are small among the clans of Judah, out of you will come for me one who will be ruler over Israel, whose origins are from of old, from ancient times. Therefore Israel will be abandoned until the time when she who is in labor gives birth and the rest of his brothers return to join the Israelites. He will stand and shepherd his flock in the strength of the LORD, in the majesty of the name of the LORD his God. And they will live securely, for then his greatness will reach to the ends of the earth. And he will be their peace. When the Assyrian invades our land and marches through our fortresses, we will raise against him seven shepherds, even eight leaders of men. – Micah 5:2-4 (NIV)

“The point of verse 2 is Bethlehem is small. God chooses something small, quiet, out of the way and does something there that changes the course of history and eternity.” The reason is that man cannot boast in his personal merits but only in the glorious mercy of God. Furthermore, Micah contrasts little Bethlehem with the greatness of the Messiah in order to magnify God’s glory. So then, not only is the “virgin birth” of Christ impossible for man but the Lord makes the point of choosing the place, which man cannot boast of as well.

This is not the only time He does this in scripture. The Lord chooses “the elder to serve the younger” (Rom. 9:12). He chooses not a great warrior to defeat Goliath but a boy, David, who was also from Bethlehem. Does the boy choose a sword or a great hammer? No. He chooses a slingshot.

Understanding that everything is from God’s sovereign grace it would be silly of us to boast in any of our own merits. The implications of God’s sovereign grace are two-fold. First, as we’ve already mentioned, we must throw ourselves at the glorious mercy of God. By throwing ourselves at the mercies of God we are not boasting in ourselves but in the Lord. We know the merits have been given to us as a free gift.

27 Where then is boasting? It is excluded. By what kind of law? Of works? No, but by a law of faith. 28 For we maintain that a man is justified by faith apart from works of the Law. – Romans 3:27-28 (NASB)

So what happens to human boasting? A transformation takes place, which leads to human boasting, turning into gratitude and praise towards the Lord. This is worship, not with song only but also with our lives as well.

1 Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. – Romans 12:1 (NASB)

The second implication of God’s sovereign grace through the virgin birth of Christ is that the Lord keeps his promises. Throughout the OT the Lord promised hope in the form of the coming Messiah. He kept that promise and fulfilled it through His Son Jesus Christ.

12 When your days are complete and you lie down with your fathers, I will raise up your descendant after you, who will come forth from you, and I will establish his kingdom. 13 He shall build a house for My name, and I will establish the throne of his kingdom forever. 14 I will be a father to him and he will be a son to Me; when he commits iniquity, I will correct him with the rod of men and the strokes of the sons of men, 15 but My lovingkindness shall not depart from him, as I took it away from Saul, whom I removed from before you. 16 Your house and your kingdom shall endure before [c]Me forever; your throne shall be established forever. – 2 Samuel 7:12-16 (NASB)

This promise was given before the fall and exile of Judah. Micah knew of this promise and yet, he saw his people reject it and fall into exile. You can tell how firmly someone believes God’s promise by whether it gives him strength and hope when life caves in around him. Micah never lost hope. He knew God would keep His promise.

Clearly, the promises of God do not guarantee us freedom from physical harm in this life. But the Lord does promise for all who believe in Him ultimate salvation, which is salvation in the end. This ought to give us hope and strength for today as we seek out God’s glory and not our own. For He keeps His promises.

Let goods and kindred go, 
This mortal life also; 
The body they may kill:
 God’s truth abideth still, 
His kingdom is forever.

The Essence of Christmas

2011-12-21T14:18:00.000-08:00

In the midst of crazy shopping and the hustle and bustle let's not forget Christ is the reason for the season. Here are a couple of good videos to remind us of the substance of Christmas.

Christmas Flash Mob by Journey of Faith at South Bay Galleria

Here's a short film titled "That's Christmas"
We all know about the real Christmas. Don't we? Mary and Joseph. Away in a manger. Donkey. 3 wise men and the shepherds. Of course you do. You probably even played a shepherd or a wise man when you were 5.

Now you're older and it's all Noel Edmunds, booze, bills and unwanted visits to relatives.

This film brings Christmas back to it's roots. The real Christmas. Where the manger mings, the baby cries and where a star really shone. The Christmas that is for everyone, everywhere.

That's Christmas (Short Film) HD from St Helen’s Church on Vimeo.

Santa Clause is Coming to Town!

2011-12-17T08:28:00.000-08:00

It’s Christmas break and I’m actually excited about Christmas this year. If you were asking, “Why wouldn’t you be excited about Christmas every year?” Well, let’s just say I had a rough background growing up that didn’t really nurture good feelings towards the holidays. A big part of my transformation for newfound Christmas appreciation is my friends and family.

My wife and I spend Christmas with her side of the family each year. My first “real” Christmas experience was 2008. After experiencing something like that for the first time in my life my first thought was, “Wow! White people really do have it good.” So the past two years, I didn’t really feel actively involved- not because my new family didn’t make that effort, but rather, it was I trying to get use to the idea of actually having a family tradition.

This year, however, I’ve already started my Christmas shopping and found some great gifts. Considering how much of a tightwad I am, when was the last time I actually got excited about spending money that wasn’t on food or Laker season tickets? Even after a few years I’m still learning how to be a part of a family. The process doesn’t bother me. Actually, it gives me a blueprint on how to start my own tradition when Katie and I start having kids ourselves (whenever that may be).

Look at that. It’s been three paragraphs and I haven’t even talked about the end of the NBA lockout, which, coincidently, will bring the beginning of the season on CHRISTMAS DAY!!!

Back to “White people have it good.” I realize that not all people look forward to the holidays because they realize, “Oh man, I have to spend time with family members I don’t like.” The holidays can be stressful for a number of reasons but I think that tops the list (my 2nd reason why the holidays are stressful is that pumpkin spice sucks). Who wants to spend their time off with family members they don’t particularly like? If I had to spend time with my psychopathic older sister it would send chills down my spine. So I get it. But is it possible to learn how to appreciate these times? If I did, I say yes.

Growing up within a fragmented family and trying to find my own way without much guidance or adult supervision was psychologically damaging. It took years for the Lord to heal the issues that bore from the whole experience and I probably still have more issues I’m completely unaware of. Whatever issues you may have within your own family, I encourage you to deal with them in a God-glorifying manner. Learn how to be an active member of the family. It’ll look different for everyone. But my excitement this year is both handing out gifts and giving the family devotion (which I’ll post here on Christmas morning). I think I’ll even use the Bible.

In any case, I hope and pray that the holidays will be a blessing for everyone and not just something to get over or simply punching in a timecard waiting to punch out. There are many wonderful theological implications for this season and it would be a waste to not see that during this time. I don’t want to give too much away from my devotion but I think you get the point. Even if your family is a nightmare, keep in mind at least the NBA is back.

What’s on TV?

2011-11-26T08:34:00.000-08:00

I wrote this right before the NBA reached an agreement. I hope you enjoy it anyway.

With no NBA season in sight I’ve had several people ask me, “How are you handling it?” In short: not well. My wife is wondering if I need an intervention because I’ve been watching the same YouTube clips of the same basketball highlights over and over and over again. Well, since there’s been no NBA season I’ve tried to cope by seeing what else is on TV.

Football

I’ve been trying to watch more football both NFL and college. My wife, and her family, are diehard college football fans. Truthfully, I can admit that the atmosphere of a college football game is just absolutely amazing. It’s a big reason why the games are exciting because EVERYONE is into the game. It doesn’t matter if it’s 30-below-zero. People are showing up for their team and cheering like crazy. What drives me crazy when I’m at a Laker game is watching people texting, not paying attention to the game, or coming late and leaving early. Why spend all that money on gas, parking, and food in addition to your tickets when you could be doing all that at home for free? It kills me. It also takes away from the fans that are into the game. I don’t care what sporting event it is, I can’t stand apathy. It has no place in sports.

Having said that, I would blow up all of football in order to have my NBA back. Before you diehard football fans get mad just know I would understand if you were willing to blow up basketball in order to save football season. I’ve watched more college football this season than in my entire life combined. And still, I can’t name a single college football player. When it comes to the NFL, I’ve tried watching the games on Sunday but the games are right over our Sunday afternoon naptime. I can’t stay awake past halftime. I don’t know how you football fans do it.

Say “Yes” To The Dress

I’ve been over to the in-laws a couple of times when the women have taken over control of the TV, which is never a good thing. The father-in-law (aka The Big Daddy) is nowhere to be found. So what do the women watch? “Say ‘Yes’ to The Dress.” This is where my iphone comes in handy because I can totally disengage and be completely justified in doing so. I can just observe the women and notice how certain characters consistently annoy them. But don’t dare ask them, “If these people annoy you so much why are you watching this show?” I watched about 5 minutes of one show and felt my balls shrinking significantly. Would I burn every single wedding dress in America, except my wife’s of course, in order to get my NBA back? Let’s move on.

The Biggest Loser

My wife enjoys this show. I used to think it’s unfair. I workout all the time and have no shot at winning any money whereas fat people start working out and it becomes a show. What in the world? But then when I started watching the show hearing and seeing the story of how people’s lives have changed for the better when they started to live a healthier life it became fairly inspiring. There are people who had difficulty putting their socks on in the morning because they were so overweight. After they’ve gone through the program, they were able to go about their daily business without much labor and seeing how it positively affects their relationships is heart-warming. Let’s say “Yes” to healthy living and “Who cares” to the dress. I even asked my wife if it would be a good idea to gain 200 pounds in order to get on the show and win some money. She gave me the “H*** no!” look. Oh well. But after one episode I got bored and asked her to tell me who wins when the season was over. You can only take watching people struggling to run a mile for so long.

The Walking Dead

Season one is currently streaming on Netflix. When I was browsing and came across the show I said to myself, “Why not” which is strange because I’m not really into zombie movies. You know what? It wasn’t bad. The characters are interesting there is plenty of conflict and character development within the group of survivors that’s appealing. Season one was solid. Now we’re about at the half way point of season two and there’s just more drama. It’s turning into a soap opera with flesh eating zombies. Although the second season is attempting to add depth by way of asking the question “How in the h*** do we live in a world overrun by flesh eating zombies?” (e.g., do we have a baby or abort it?). Those are good topics to go over for the show but with less action and an even less sense of direction about where the show is headed my interest is waning.

Fringe

When I was still hopeful of an NBA season happening I decided that I wasn’t going to watch the new season of Fringe, which I already mentioned in a previous blog. Since then I decided to pick the show back up in hopes that it’ll be decent. In short, they finally found Peter Bishop (although the Fringe characters didn’t even know they were looking for him) and quite frankly, it’s been underwhelming. No one remembers who he is or where he belongs although he continues to help them with solving Fringe cases. For three seasons the show was building up the Olivia/Peter relationship only to start from scratch for season four. Sweet. If I wanted to spend time building a house only to tear it down I would build a house and tear it down.

There have been other shows I’ve watched briefly that aren’t even worth mentioning. I can’t believe the crappy shows that inundate the airwaves. If there were this much crap in our pipes we’d be calling a plumber. I’m convinced my buddy Bryan and I could write a better show. No, I take that back. I’m convinced my buddy Aaron and I could write better shows.

In short, I need my NBA and I need it badly. If only for sanity’s sake. I know more about the issues involved in the lockout than some of the players do (I’m not joking) and this lockout is indefensible and completely illogical. Why would the players trust their future in the hands of lawyers who stand to gain a great deal of money if litigation is long and lengthy while they are getting paid zero dollars, forfeiting 2 billion dollars, with no guarantee they’ll get a better deal? It makes no sense. It only makes sense if it’s because they take this business personally.

In which case, the players are that much more detached from reality. How many of their fans put up with difficult bosses because it’s better to have a job than no job at all? How many men and women put up with companies who treat them poorly because they have to provide for their families and can’t afford to risk losing their jobs during a struggling economy? I haven’t even mentioned the people who are without jobs. It’s sickening. You know what else is sickening? When this lockout is over I’ll be watching game one.

Thankfulness 2011

2011-11-23T16:43:00.000-08:00

It’s that time for my annual “Thankfulness” list where I list things I’m thankful for in honor of Thanksgiving. Instead of writing out a list and explaining each item I’m going to do something different this year. During our list Grace Group (Home Bible Study) there was a reoccurring theme that came up of dealing with family tension during the holidays.

Some background: My perspective on the holiday season has changed throughout the years. Now that I’m a part of a wonderful, yet crazy, family I look forward to the holiday season. The only tension during family outings is the tension I cause, which happens to be pretty fun. I understand that it isn’t all fun and games for quite a few families. Growing up in a broken home without any type of real emotional connection or intimacy makes for a crappy holiday season- tension replaces harmony, awkwardness substitutes for stimulating conversations, and loneliness overtakes joy. Sometimes that’s just how it works in a Fallen world, but know God doesn’t want you to experience that.

Our church just finished preaching through the book of Colossians. The last sermon was fitting for addressing the very issues some of us face during the holidays. I’ll just give you the bullet points with some of my thoughts. The primary passage during the reflection service was Col. 3:12-17:

12 Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. 14And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. 15And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. 16Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. 17And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

1. Compassionate: "Bowels of Mercy" Love characterized by active heart felt mercy.
The “Bowels of Mercy” means mercy that is deep inside of you, turned out towards others. I can relate to this because it takes some serious digging for me to be compassionate. There are family members I just don’t want to show compassion to but that’s because I’m a jerk. So then, I need some serious “bowel” work.

2. Kind: Generous and warm-hearted, with a gracious, sympathetic disposition.
I think about my mom when I see or hear the word “kind.” She was “kindness” personified.

3. Humble: Considering others above ourselves and serving them. Not being overly impressed by a sense of your own self-importance. (Phil 2:3-8)
This was rather convicting because when it comes to people I generally don’t like I just avoid them. I never connected that attitude with a lack of humility or being too “self-important” to bother myself with people I don’t like or even people I don’t really know all that well. Humility reaches out to people, even the ones we deem unreachable.

4. Meek/Gentle: Tender, kind, and considerate; not cruel, ruthless, (might have missed some of this def.)
What a minute? We’re not supposed to be cruel?

5. Patient: Not easily provoked. Showing kindness to one who sins against you over a long period of time.
Regarding being patient, the part of the definition I get hung up on is the “over a long period of time.” How many times are we to forgive or put up with people’s non-sense? I wasn’t the only one. The apostle Peter asked the same question to Jesus (Matt. 18:21). Jesus replied with The Parable of the Unmerciful Servant, where it was clear you didn’t want to be that guy. Those who realize they’ve been forgiven much also forgive much.

6. Forbearing: to endure with others in difficulty of relationships. (1 Cor. 13:4-7)
What I said in #3.

7. Forgiving: Not exacting payment but freely and graciously treating someone better than they deserve. (1 John 4:10 and 1 John 3:16)
What I said in #5.

8. Thankful: Gratitude from the realization that all you are and have is from God. (Col 3:15,16)
Yes, so this blog comes full circle. This year the Lord extended my sphere of gratitude. I’m also thankful for the difficult relationships I have in my life because they’re all designed by God to help me be a servant extending the compassion given to me unto others. Everything comes from God, all of the wonderful blessings and the “apparent” bad that come into our lives. Either way, it’s all good.

Magic Defied Tragic

2011-11-07T15:56:00.000-08:00

It's been 20 years since Magic Johnson announced he was HIV positive. Today I spent my lunch break reading reading articles about this very special day. It still brings tears to my face when I think about it. When HBO came out with the Magic Johnson and Larry Bird Documentary I wrote this:

Finally, there was Magic’s HIV announcement. After a physical before the 1991–92 NBA season, Johnson discovered that he had tested positive for HIV. In a press conference held on November 7, 1991, Johnson made a public announcement that he would retire immediately. He stated that his wife Cookie and their unborn child did not have HIV, and that he would dedicate his life to "battle this deadly disease." Johnson initially said that he did not know how he contracted the disease, but later acknowledged that it was through having multiple sexual partners during his playing career. At the time, only a small percentage of HIV-positive people had contracted it from heterosexual sex, and it was initially rumored that Johnson was gay or bisexual, although he denied both. Johnson's announcement became a major news story in the United States, and in 2004 was named as ESPN's seventh most memorable moment of the past 25 years. Many articles praised Johnson as a hero, and former U.S. President George H. W. Bush said, "For me, Magic is a hero, a hero for anyone who loves sports.”

I remember being in high school when Magic’s HIV announcement hit me like a frozen sledgehammer. Some of my female friends couldn’t understand why I was so depressed over it saying idiotic things like, “You don’t even know him, why do you care so much?” I just gave them the “You’re absolutely dumb and it would be a complete waste of time to even try and explain it to you” look and moved on without saying anything.

How would they ever understand the connection of a fatherless boy and his sports hero, the only positive male role model he’s known (at the time)? How would they ever understand how the heart of a man yearns for the inspiration of other greater men? How would they ever understand that all young men desire to be great but need personification of that greatness to see what it looks like? How would they ever understand the heart of a man seeks advantage and we live that advantage vicariously through our sports figure? Given the historical context, HIV was a death sentence. There was little awareness of how the virus could infect a person or how they could even live through it. “My hero was going to die,” I thought to myself. No high school girl will have the ability to understand this. And I don’t blame them.

Reflecting on the life of Magic Johnson, I began to realize how much of an impact he had on my life. As I get older I try and keep things in perspective. The reason he contracted the HIV virus was a direct result of his infidelity. But instead of hanging his head in shame, he become a spokesperson for HIV awareness. As a result, the general public seems more educated on the subject.

There have been mistakes I've made in the past where I've spend a great deal of time in despair. No I'm not perfect. Either was Magic Johnson, my childhood hero. However, how a person deals with tragedy could completely alter the path of the individual's life. Magic Johnson could've given up and simply laid down and waited to die. Instead, he turned tragedy into a symbol of hope. Whether you enjoy basketball or not I believe there is a lesson here for all of us.

Best Man, Worst Moment

2011-11-03T16:43:00.000-07:00

In June of 2002, my buddy Dom, who I’ve known since middle school, married his beautiful wife Jessica (to this day I don’t know how Dom ever let his wife schedule the wedding over the NBA Finals). Bryan Benavidez was his best man and we know one of the responsibilities of the best man is to give the wedding toast. All week Bryan talked about how he was going to “bring the house down” with his toast. I emphatically replied, “Preach it!” Shortly after the ceremony, everybody began to settle at their assigned tables for the reception. Bryan calmly walked up to the front, with microphone in hand, squared himself to the audience in preparation to speak. I yelled, “Preach it brother!” which was quickly followed by a chuckle from Bryan. Personally knowing the full story of what Bryan and Dom had been through as friends, because I was there for most of those stories, for the first time in my life I was actually eager to hear what Bryan had to say. He began by saying, “I’ve known Dom for a long time and I’ve never seen him as emotional as I saw him last night.” As he attempted to continue, he was overcome by emotion, clearly welling up beyond what he could contain he raised his glass to the air for the toast abruptly ending his speech by saying, “Shall we?” while everyone awkwardly said “Uh, cheers?”

Here’s a recap of Bryan’s best man speech at Dom’s wedding:

I’ve known Dom for a long time and I’ve never seen him as emotional as I saw him last light . . . (raising his glass to the air) shall we?

I don’t think I’m overstating myself when I say Bryan’s speech didn’t “bring the house down.” Staying true to form, for seven straight years, I mercilessly mocked him like a pack of attention starved Middle Schoolers.

The wedding toast is a ritual expression of honor and goodwill towards the bridge and groom. Being chosen as the best man of a particular wedding is a great honor. By choosing a best man, the groom communicates, “Out of all the people that matter in my life, YOU are my closest friend and the person who I want closest to me on the most important day of my life.” Being chosen as the best man is an honor, which carries with it serious weight. There are many responsibilities that come with being the best man, but for the intended purpose of this blog, lets just focus on the Best Man Speech.

There are tons of things the best man does behind the scenes, not only during the wedding ceremony and reception, but in the weeks and days leading up to the wedding itself. However, when it comes to the wedding toast/speech, the best man is front and center for all those in attendance to see. Everyone knows who he is because he stood closest to the groom during the ceremony. This particular part of the wedding is extremely unique. It’s the best man’s moment to shine, not for himself, but for the groom. Meaning, if the best man does an outstanding job in giving the speech then it’s a positive reflection on the groom because the friends you have in your life are a direct reflection of your character. On the other hand, if the best man completely bombs in giving the speech then people are left saying “THIS guy is the best man? The groom must be a complete tool for picking him.” There’s really no in-between.

I’ve been to countless weddings and I can’t tell you how many botched best man speeches I’ve witnessed. As a man, it’s one of the most disappointing things for me to witness. A guy is given a great honor on the most important day of his best friend’s life and he couldn’t put more than 20 minutes of thought into his speech? Usually it ends up being completely juvenile filled with stories of childish behavior. I’m sure the bride’s parents appreciate those stories. I wonder how many “Wait a sec . . . are we really giving away our daughter to this jack@$$?” moments are at a wedding?

Sometimes the best man speech is completely incoherent- words come out of the guy’s mouth but there’s absolutely no sense of purpose or direction, just complete senseless babbling. You often see this when the best man gets nerves or is unprepared. I’ve yelled out, “Get a grip man! Breathe!!!” only to have my wife tell me to stop yelling at him because I’m making it worse. I’ve also witness the babbling go on and on and on because the best man knew he wasn’t making any sense but didn’t know how to end the speech. It was painfully awkward for everyone. I nearly walked over and pulled the plug on the microphone to put him out of his misery like Old Yeller.

In contrast, when my buddy Aaron got married he had the entire wedding party give a mini-speech at the reception. He told us in advance and gave us time to think about what we were going to say. My buddy Jordan and I immediately felt the weight of that responsibility. The wedding was in the East Coast and Jordan and I flew out there and spent the week with him. Every night before going to bed we had this dialogue:

Jordan: “Do you know what you’re going to say?”
Me: “No, do you know what you’re going to say?”
Jordan: “No, I not sure what I’m going to say.”
Me: “Me neither.”

We repeated this dialogue every night for the entire week. It was stressful because we didn’t want to sound like a couple of idiots and make Aaron look like a complete jack@$$. In short, when it was time for Jordan and I to give our speeches we did well. It was a great time and we couldn’t stop talking about the wedding and everyone else’s speech on the flight home because EVERYONE was thoughtful, articulate, and engaging. It made Aaron’s wedding that much more memorable. I often reflect about that time and how much it meant for me to be there for my friend. Furthermore, I can imagine how much it must of meant to Aaron, not only the “Thanks for not making me look like a jack@$$” but also “You’ve made the most important day of my life that much more meaningful not only for me but also for my family.”

This was a direct result of pouring in hours of thinking about what to say and how to say it. Jordan and I prayed for God’s guidance while bouncing ideas off of each other. We practiced and rehearsed the speech to each other and in our heads countless times, shaping and reshaping it until we were completely comfortable with the end product. Does it always come out the way you planned it? Of course not. There’s the need to “feel the crowd,” consider what have other members of the wedding party already said, and keep your emotions in check, at least enough to deliver the speech well. I went over all of those scenarios in my head taking into account how unpredictable emotions can be and adjusted accordingly.

Some people might say, “That’s a lot of work over a 3-5 minute speech.” My reply is that’s EXACTLY what you do to tell your friend “Thank you for this great honor you are giving me.” If there’s any film/movie/video you’ve ever enjoyed, know that those few minutes of your favorite scenes took hours to produce. That goes for speeches or sermons that have been moving, articulate, and engaging. It takes time to craft them. So you can imagine how disappointed I get when I hear other guys given such an honor at a wedding and run it through the mud.

My wife tells me, “Not everyone is gifted in public speaking so cut them some slack.” My counter-argument is, “No, not everyone is gifted in public speaking but at the very least I expect the person to be coherent, thoughtful, and well-meaning . . . and too often I see none of the above.” At least act like you’ve given it some thought. I mean it’s only your friend’s most important day of his life. Is that too much to ask? I say no.

I’ve given other wedding speeches before and it’s been an absolute blast. When I’m given a responsibility to add more meaning to the most meaningful day of my friend’s life, I take that seriously. I’m not sure if I’m “gifted” in public speaking anymore than a person who is “gifted” in lifting a lot of weight. If you walk into a gym and see a guy who’s benching 250lbs or more, your initial thought isn’t, “Wow that guy is ‘gifted’ in lifting weights.” No, you simply realize he’s put in the time and reps in order to be able to lift that amount of weight. It’s old-fashioned W-O-R-K. It’s no secret. However, there is the artistic element in giving the best man speech. Personally, I use this formula and it’s been extremely successful. If you’re ever given the honor as the best man, you could decide to use it if you want. If not, I won’t be offended, but when the time comes for you to make the speech, just be sure to make some da** sense.

The Intro.

The first element should be a catchy introduction that gets people laughing to loosen them up. This is important. People are on guard when they hand over the microphone to the best man because of all the non-sense I mentioned above. People are almost expecting you to be a jack@$$. When you lead off with some clean humor it relaxes the crowd. Of course you should always have a contingency plan if your joke falls flat. This is why getting feedback from friends and family would be helpful.

A Story

The second element is a good narrative that is unique to you and the groom, which gives insight into the groom’s character in order for others to know him better. Most guys talk about how long they’ve known the groom, “I’ve know _________________ since _______________.” But that doesn’t mean anything if you don’t attach a good story that reveals both the substance of your friendship and the contents of his character.

For example, at my buddy Jordan’s wedding I talked about the time when we were living in an apartment together during grad-school. We had a neighbor, a 22-year-old man who had autism. I mentioned he was extremely annoying. I didn’t mentioned this to be a jerk but to say that despite his annoyance, Jordan welcomed him in the apartment, befriended him, cooked him dinner, invited him to church, and even took him to a Lakers’ game. Basically, Jordan wasn’t just a nerd who studied all the time (although he is definitely a nerd who studies all the time). He cares about people and loves them with the love of Christ.

Let’s see how this story measures up with my formula. Is it a story unique only to Jordan and I? Check. Does it reveal the substances of our friendship (grad-students living for Christ)? Check. Does it reveal the contents of Jordan’s character to the audience? Check. I guarantee his wife’s parents were not thinking, “Wait a sec . . . are we really giving away our daughter to this jack@$$?” No, if anything, they felt even more confident in Jordan that he’ll take good care of their daughter by being a loving husband.

Personal Impact

The final element is the conclusion, which consists of how the groom personally impacted your life. At Aaron’s wedding, I mentioned all the times he spoke wisdom into my life and I highlighted the imprint it left. The wisdom and counsel he shared brought more self-awareness and an understanding of the circumstances surrounding whatever it was we were talking about. To this day I believe I am able to do that for other people and it's a direct result of having Aaron in my life. I feel like I have a part of all my friends inside my life. They help shape who I am, and not talking to them on a regular basis anymore doesn’t change that because the impact they had is everlasting. You can shape those three elements to your liking. But it’s important to have all three because it connects the audience to the groom through you.

Back to my friend Bryan for a minute. I mentioned that I ruthlessly mocked him for bombing Dom’s wedding speech. Even as I write this I almost feel badly about it . . . almost. Nearly seven years after that train-wreck of a wedding speech, Bryan received a shot at redemption in the form of speaking at my wedding (I had all my groomsmen say something). All my friends did great and I appreciated their contribution on the most important day of my life, particularly Bryan. He knew if he bombed this one I would be bagging on him when we’re in heaven with Jesus. He felt the pressure more than my other friends because I haven’t ruthlessly mocked anyone else for seven straight years. Despite the pressure, you know what he did? He used my formula without even knowing he was using my formula. He had a catchy introduction that got people laughing. He had a couple of short stories about his interaction with my mom when they would talk about me, a story unique to Bryan and I, which gave insight into the depths and substance of our friendship. There were times when the emotion of the moment appeared to be catching up to Bryan, but instead of attempting to talk through the raw emotion and sounding completely drunk and incoherent (like a certain sister-in-law of mine) he took a moment and patiently waited for the emotions to subside. Afterwards, he proceeded with the speech with great clarity. His timing, tenor, and tone were perfect. The transitions were smooth and he concluded the speech with how our friendship personally impacted his own life in a way that was meaningful and everlasting.

Of course I would never actually tell him any of this because I enjoy bagging on him so much. I have a reputation to keep. In short, the next time you are bestowed a great honor like being chosen as the best man of a wedding, take it seriously because if you don’t you’ll look like a jack@$$. And yes, I will be making fun of you.

4 years ago today - Mom went home.

2011-10-30T11:50:00.000-07:00

Four years ago today my mom went home to be with the Lord. I've often reflect on the impact she had on my life and the lives of others. All the things my mom taught me I still hold close to my heart. And on this day I simply wanted to honor by reposting some of the blogs I've written about her through the years since she's been gone. My hope one day is to write a biography about her amazing life and journey. But for now, blogging will have to do.

Here's an excerpt from my mom's eulogy:

On October 30th of the year 2007, my mom went into the presence of God. She is now better off but the world is slightly dimmer.

There are times in my personal Christianity where the barrier between the present world, the world of our senses, and the next world of eternality seem thick. Sometimes it is failed expectations, my personal sin, or times where everything seems spiritually dry and stagnate. During these times God seems so distant and estranged.

Then there are other times where God’s presences never felt more real. Something happens that makes the wall of this present world and eternality seem inches apart, “and the things of earth grow strangely dim.” This is one of those times for me. I have never experience so much pain and peace, so much sorrow and joy, being extremely disheartened and yet abounding in hope. The pain of losing my mom so suddenly but the peace in knowing that she is with Jesus, the sorrow in missing my mom and her support but the joy in knowing that I will see her again, extremely disheartened because I wish I could have been a better son but hopeful knowing that she would want me to be okay and continue to serve the Lord and I will honor her in doing just that.

You could read the rest of it here.

During the second year without mom, I decided to write her a letter updating her with what's going on in my life. I didn't do this nearly enough when she was around.

Mom,

If you were still here, I would tell you about the beautiful wife who I married and how she’s an answer to your many years of prayer. I have no doubt that you would love Katie and her family (especially her mom, Lynn. I could see you guys talk into the night about whatever it is that mothers talk about into the night and laughing about stories of my foolishness).

You could read the rest of it here.

Here are a couple of random memories that came up as I was just going through life.

Normally I try to avoid the cafeteria at school all together because the lack of food quality is downright depressing. I could ensure you that when Junior Jr. comes along he will not be eating school lunches. Today, however, the cafeteria was serving corndogs. No they weren’t all that appealing. The corndogs triggered a fond memory of my mom. Every time she took my younger sister and I shopping at the mall, she bought us corndogs as a reward for enduring hours of wondering aimlessly through department stores. My feet were so swollen I couldn’t get the shoes off of them when I got home.

Then I started to miss my mom while I was thinking about this.

Click here to read the rest.

Here's one of my wife's Facebook post:

Jr and I were in Montebello today getting his car serviced and then getting both of our cars washed. When we got to the car wash, the lady inside greeted Jr enthusiastically, and gave us a little discount... all because she knew your mom. :) Jr and I both enjoyed laughing at the fact that even years later- at the car wash of all places- we get benefits because people are so grateful for your mom and who she was! I'm so sad that I never got to meet her here on earth, but I'm so grateful that I'll get to some day in heaven. She sure was a special woman. :)

Click here to read the rest.

One of the most amazing memories of my mom was how she led one of my uncle(s) to the Lord.

You could click here to read the story - A "Prodigal Uncle"

Most recently, I wrote about on my recent trip to Thailand impacted my life. I had no idea it would and the memory of my mom's life had everything to do with it.

Realizing that your nationality is a gift from God to use for His glory totally explains my mom’s passion for her people. She was an evangelist to the core but there was a particular passion for her people, Thai people. She was never prideful about being Thai, she just enjoyed it, loved it and cherished it. She didn’t have tattoos written in Thai (nothing wrong with tattoos, by the way). She didn’t marginalize people for not being Thai. It didn’t matter to my mom who you were or where you came from; if you didn’t know Jesus you were going to hear about Him. And even if you already knew Jesus you were still going to hear about Him. I’ve often said that if George Whitefield were an Asian woman he would be my mother.

Click here to read the rest.

I have to admit reposting these blogs got me a little emotional. Every so often I wonder how life would be if she were still around. I have deep regret she never met Katie or her family. I'm sadden she never lived to see her vision of becoming a missionary in Thailand where I have no doubts she would lead hundreds to the Lord (if not thousands). But God has a plan in all of this. And I trust Him fully. Maybe that's why handling her lose is possible because I know that God knows all these things. More importantly, my mom trusted the Lord and would want me to do the same. And that's the legacy she left and that's the legacy I'll continue.

A Tribute To The Single Life

2011-10-25T15:05:00.000-07:00

This is looooooooooooooong over due. My intention was to start a series on The Christian Dating Scene, but I got side tracked on my way back from The Motherland. Sorry about that. This is my attempt to kick-start this series. I’ll start by giving a tribute to the single life. Yes, there were times during this era in my life when I was extremely frustrated. For example, seeing my friends getting married off like it was a speed-dating contest kept me wondering, “When is it going to be my da** turn?”

Of course that’s a reflection of discontentment. You’re taught as a Christian to be content in what ever state you’re in, especially if you’re single. However, finding contentment in your single life when friends around you are getting married, seeing that someone updated their relationship status to “engaged,” every time you log on Facebook, and watching a baby dedication at your church every two weeks can make finding that contentment seem like a daunting task.

Furthermore, when people who have been married for 20 plus years tell you to be content, your initial reaction is, “Easy for you to say, you’ve been married for 20 plus years.” You know the answer is to “focus on Jesus” but you’re tired of hearing it. You may be tired of hearing it but it’s true. Here’s a different way to look at it. What helped me during my struggles of wanting a wife was not focusing on what I didn’t have but what I did have. I had amazing friends who cared about the state of my soul. I had a wonderful and godly mother who loved me more than life itself. I was attending Biola University where my primary responsibility was to learn and study God’s word. That’s not a bad life.

During that time, I was able to attend youth camp with my previous church in Yosemite, go on a missions trip to New York six months after 9/11, go on a missions trip to Japan the year before that, and spend over a month in Israel, Jordan, and Egypt learning the geography of the Bible through Talbot School of Theology’s Bible Lands program. In addition, I was able to throw myself completely into my studies and completed two Master’s degrees in three years, went on a missions trip to Thailand, and made life-long friendships throughout my college career.

I understand people have girlfriends and boyfriends throughout college but that wasn’t God’s plan for my life. Maybe I would’ve been too distracted to pour into my studies, maybe I would’ve distracted a girlfriend (I sure distracted my roommates), maybe my life-long friendships wouldn’t have been as solid. There are a host of reasons when God didn’t bring someone in my life until after grad-school. But you know what? I don’t really care what those reasons were. The results are undeniable, which affirms God’s infinite wisdom, knowledge, and kindness towards me.

Giving myself completely over to the things God did give me resulted in their maximum enjoyment and everlasting effect. Had I spent the time moping about not having a girlfriend, it would’ve been a missed opportunity to get the most I could have out of my single life. Don’t get me wrong, I did spend quite a bit of time moping about not have a girlfriend, but by God’s grace I had good friends to slap me when I needed to be slapped.

It was a unique time and one that can’t be replicated. Learning how to connect with my peers with substance aided in personal self-awareness, discerning between authentic and shallow relationships, and ultimately prepared me to thrive in the marriage life. I’ve seen people rush into marriage only to see it disintegrate within a few years. There can be lots of reasons why a marriage fails. Ultimately, though, I couldn’t have felt more prepared for something as serious as marriage had I not taken my single life seriously. Single life is not simply, “waiting around for someone” in order to get married. It’s a staging ground to prepare us for responsibilities of a different kind, responsibilities that carry with them eternal weight and deep emotional consequences far beyond getting a C in class or simply getting through Finals week.

I’ve often heard married people say, “I wish I could’ve _________________ while I was single.” Standing at the altar with friends and loved ones before God and man, I looked back at my single life and said, “I did everything I’ve ever wanted as a single man. Now, I’m ready for the next chapter in my life.” I can tell you that my wife is glad I was productive during my single life. I hope more people at the altar can say the same thing because the single life can never be replicated.

Having said all that, I'm delightfully married and love my wife like no other. I don't ever want to be single again. I'm not "counting money in front of the poor" when I say that. Marriage life has been wonderful but I believe it's due in no small part to maximizing the opportunities I had in my single life. It's a gift that needs to be stewarded well, for if we are not faithful in the little things, how can the Lord trust us in the bigger things?"

11 For the LORD God is a sun and shield;
the LORD bestows favor and honor;
no good thing does he withhold
from those whose walk is blameless (Ps 84:11 - NIV).

McDonald’s Growth

2011-10-23T12:54:00.000-07:00

After Morgan Spurlock’s documentary “Super Size Me,” (where he nearly committed suicide by eating McDonalds for every meal of the day for a month), the growing “health movement,” people being more aware of the contents of their food, popular shows like “Biggest Loser” and best sellers like “Eat This Not That,” you would think McDonalds would finally go bankrupt because you can only feed people crap for so long until they realize what they are actually putting into their bodies.

However, McDonald’s net income actually grew 9% in the last quarter. As a result:

Investors rewarded the news, sending shares up more than 3 percent to $91.96.
McDonald's has performed well throughout the recession and its aftermath, partly because the chain has managed to reshape its image from a burger-and-fries joint into a hip, healthy place to eat. The world's largest burger chain, which other fast-food companies often copy, has introduced new menu items like smoothies and oatmeal, remodeled restaurants, and converted more locations to 24-hour operations [emphasis added].

Jim Skinner, McDonald's CEO, goes on to say in a statement that the third-quarter results are "a clear indication that our strategy is working." I commend McDonald’s for their “outside the box” type of thinking and “reshaping its image” to align themselves with the sign of the times and readjusting to customer changes. They recognized people were saying, “Look, we’re not eating crap anymore.” This led to the reshaping of the company in order to meet the needs (or wants) of the customer. It seems so simple to me.

If it’s so simple then why can’t the NBA fix their current system and “reshape” things in order to gain revenue? I feel an angry tangent coming on so I’ll refrain. This doesn’t mean I’m going to start eating at McDonalds again- far from it. I’m 35 years old now, and I get sick just driving past a McDonalds. (Not to mention my wife would kill me if the food doesn’t kill me first.)

I simply wanted to point out the principle of being open to “reshaping” a company that has been successful for decades. (Of course, there will always be plenty of stubborn businessmen who resist change. I’m looking at you NBA. Okay that’s the last sentence on the NBA, I promise.). Whether you agree with the product they’re selling is not the point. Being a successful business for any length of time requires invention, flexibility, and creativity. We know that as customers whether we’re aware of it or not.

From an individual perspective we, too, can be stubborn businessmen who don’t want to change and feel like everyone else should conform to our ideas, which results in torpedoing our own business (like a certain professional sports league that shall not be named).

As I’m getting older I want to be open to creative ways in living my life. Maybe that’s why I’m studying finance. It’s a new field and a new challenge. I like thinking about new ideas and exploring them to their end. I love the fact the Bible does not mention “How” you should run a church service but “Why” you should have a church service at all. As a result, church service styles have changed greatly over time (the “How”) but at it’s core the substance has not, the “Why.”

Applying that principle in my own life, I have Bibles and sermons loaded on my iphone. During my commute time I turn off the radio and pray like a madman, which makes me wonder why I even bought a new car radio. I set aside a block of time just to make phone calls to my friends I don’t talk to on a regular basis. Sometimes they answer, most of the time they don’t. Sometimes they call back, sometimes they don’t. Either way, I’m calling because fellowship, connection, and drawing from other people’s perspective are important to me. It’s how I’m constantly “reshaping” my soul.

I don’t spend hours studying the Bible like I did in grad school but I don’t feel guilty about it either. Although I would still love to do that, I realize my current life-stage and situation simply doesn’t allow it. Consequently, I’ve had to be more creative with my time and use other inventions to grow in Christ, whether that’s listening to sermons while at the gym or working around the house, making phone calls to people I know I should be talking to, or praying whenever given the opportunity. I pray the Holy Spirit would give me creativity in that regard and the ability to "reshape" how I approach Christianity. It helps to know that the “How” in the “How I do things,” has changed but the “Why” in the “Why I do this,” hasn’t. I hope that makes sense.

The Avengers – Trailer

2011-10-20T21:23:00.000-07:00

At the end of Captain America: First Avenger we had a teaser from The Avengers Movie releasing later this summer. I remember leaving the theater wanting to buy a custom of one of the characters but couldn’t decide which one. The Avengers Movie is the most ambitious comic movie to date. Ever since the release of Iron Man (2008) and The incredible Hulk (2008) fan boys have been anticipating the superhero team-up for years. Here’s the basic premise:

When an unexpected enemy emerges who threatens global safety and security, Nick Fury, the director of the international peacekeeping agency known as S.H.I.E.L.D., finds himself in need of a team of superheroes to pull the world back from the brink of disaster.

Now the first full-length trailer arrived a week ago and people are buzzing over the new footage. Rightly so, each of the main members of The Avengers have had their solo movies, so watching all of them on the same screen interacting with each other is pretty exciting.

I was never a big fan of The Avengers growing up, but the way Marvel Studios has set up this movie is unparalleled. I’ll sum it up in this short phrase, “I’m in.” I don’t really care that I didn’t read the comics growing up. I’m sold. The fact that any studio has this much balls to put up this much money (budget at $220M) while producing solo movies with separate origin stories for each main character shows me they’re serious about making a good movie.

This doesn’t mean I don’t have concerns about the movie. I realize that I’m only basing my concerns off of the first trailer, but it’s the only thing I have at the moment. Despite being a trailer I can still see potential problems along the way.

Concerns:

Is This Iron Man 3?

I really enjoyed the first Iron Man movie. Robert Downey, Jr.’s character Tony Stark was impressive. The journey of his transformation from a billionaire playboy to selfless superhero was compelling. Then Iron Man 2 came out and basically nullified everything good that happened in the first movie. Now I’ve seen plenty of sequels inferior to their predecessors, but it’s rare to see a sequel so awful that it torpedoed everything good about the original. That’s what Iron Man 2 did for me. It tainted the masterpiece that was Iron Man.

Seriously, how are you going to have a compelling transformation story of a narcissistic jackass turned sacrificial hero only to turn him back into an even worse narcissistic jackass in the sequel? Halfway through Iron Man 2, I thought their goal was to have us actually root against the hero. Mission accomplished.

In the Avengers trailer, Tony Starks is clearly pushing some of the other team members buttons and getting on people’s nerves. I hope this doesn’t turn into Iron Man 3. I understand you need diversity within a group in order to make them compelling. You also need that one wild card to stir the pot and make the team dynamically interesting in the way they interact with each other. Clearly, Tony Stark is that guy. But if he goes overboard and continues the narcissistic jackass rout, his character will simply be annoying instead of compelling.

Mark Ruffalo vs. Edward Norton (Hulk vs. Hulk)

The original 2008 The Incredible Hulk was a solid movie. Edward Norton as Dr. Bruce Banner was sensational. Norton is one of my favorite actors so I was excited when I heard he was cast as Banner. Then negotiations to sign on for The Avengers broke down, which resulted in Norton not resigning with the franchise. This led the studio to cast Mark Ruffalo to take Norton’s place. This is like downgrading from Dwight Howard to Andrew Bogut. Bogut is a serviceable big man but he’s not in D. Howard’s class. Ruffalo is a serviceable actor but not in Norton’s class. If you were going to pull out all the stops for a big budget movie you’ve been planning for years, wouldn’t you get the best actors possible, especially a movie heavily relying on previous origin stories as backdrop? So if Marvel is hoping that we won’t notice downgrading an A-list actor to a B-list actor they’re sorely mistaken. Whatever the issue was ($$$), Norton not returning as Dr. Banner was a big disappointment. Lets hope The Hulk spends more time as The Hulk instead of Dr. Banner.

Scarlett Johansson as Natasha Romanoff (aka The Black Widow)

After watching the trailer I asked myself, “I wonder how many times S. Johansson will use the flying head-scissors move on an opponent, end up in a couching position after finishing him off, and whipping her hair back like she’s in a Salon Selective commercial?” Because we didn’t see that at all in Iron Man 2.

I don’t want to give the impression that I’m not looking forward to the movie because I am. Here’s a list of things I’m really looking forward.

Tom Hiddleston as Loki

The Loki in the Thor movie was a spineless manipulating twit. When I heard that he’ll be the main villain in The Avengers, I thought, “How is that wimpy fool going to cause a crisis big enough to assemble The Avengers?” After some short clips from the trailer, it’s clear that Loki looks emotionally damaged, much more cynical, and extremely darker. He doesn’t look like the spineless twit in the Thor movie but someone really hell-bent on kicking some serious tail.

Speaking of Thor, there is a quick scene with Samuel L. Jackson’s character, Nick Fury, directly asking Thor, “What are you prepared to do?” No doubt this is an awkward situation for Thor with his stepbrother attempting to destroy the earth and all. I can already see T. Starks’ wisecracks about this situation, “Wait a minute! This dude is your brother?” It’ll be interesting to see how this all plays out.

Iron Man (The Suit)

I already mentioned my concerns for the character. What I’m really looking forward to is what Iron Man’s suit will be able to do this time around. In each Iron Man movie (or in this case a movie with Iron Man in it) there has to be some type of upgrade to his suit, right? Something new and cool we haven’t seen yet? The couple of flying sequences in the trailer looked great, especially for only a trailer. I’m guessing there will be an initial attack where Iron Man gets his rear end handed to him only to go back to the drawing board finding out ways to improve his suit and utilizing those improvements just in time for the final battle scene. Okay, this is fairly predictable, but still, it’s going to be good when it happens.

Tony Starks

The flip side of my concerns with T. Starks is he can pull off the wild card member well. He can give the team dynamic enough tension where the interactions between members won’t become static but more interesting while never crossing the “complete narcissistic jackass I can’t route for” line. There’s zero gray area with this character. Either the character is well written and Downey will pull off an amazing performance where the audience will be eager for Iron Man 3, or the character will pick up where he left off in Iron Man 2. Everyone will end up hating him (the other team members and the audience) because he’s the same old narcissistic jackass, and we’ll hope he ends up blowing up or dying in the final battle scene in a blaze of glory Scarface style so we don’t have to endure Iron Man 3. There’s no in between.

Jeremy Renner as Hawkeye

Jeremy Renner has become quite the big deal. In 2009 he was in The Hurt Locker (Nominated for Best Actor). In 2010 he was in The Town (Nominated for Best Supporting Actor) will co-star with Tom Cruise in Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol (and is rumored to take over the franchise) and will take over The Bourne Identity franchise in The Bourne Legacy. He’s had an amazing run and I don’t seeing it stopping with The Avengers. Renner’s character, Hawkeye, doesn’t have superpowers so he’ll rely on guile and wit (much like the comics). I’m looking forward to a plain human being kicking some super powered villains’’ butts.

If you’re wondering “How did you get all of that in one trailer?” Short answer: No NBA. What else am I going to do with my time? Here’s the trailer:

This Week In Movies - The Thing

2011-10-14T14:41:00.000-07:00

The movie “The Thing,” which is actually a prequel to the original 1982 movie titled . . . wait for it . . . “The Thing.” I’m not sure how they expect us not to get confused. I enjoyed the original 1982 horror flick with Kurt Russell. He rocked in that movie.

Also, I remember watching it with my grandma who happened to love horror flicks, especially if they were B-Movies. For some reason she never did enjoy high budget horror flicks and probably wouldn’t be interested in most horror flicks made today. Na . . . Who am I kidding? She would love the horror flicks today!

As I became older and more importantly became a Christian, my taste for horror flicks faded. Don’t get me wrong, I still enjoy classics like Aliens and the iconic role Sigourney Weaver played as Ellen Ripley and the original 1987 Predator film starring our former Arnold Schwarzenegger and his kick-butt role as Major Alan “Dutch” Schaefer.

How many 80’s flicks to you still hear quoted? (e.g., “Get to the chopper!” “Come on kill me, I’m right here . . . DO IT NOW!!!”)

Anyway, what was I talking about? Oh yeah, The Thing coming out this week. Here’s a quick synopsis of the movie:

Paleontologist Kate Lloyd has traveled to the desolate region for the expedition of her lifetime. Joining a Norwegian scientific team that has stumbled across an extraterrestrial ship buried in the ice, she discovers an organism that seems to have died in the crash eons ago. But it is about to wake up.

Here’s “the thing” about prequels that I don’t enjoy. If we’ve seen the original movie, then we all know where the film is going to end up. Prequels by there very nature are predetermined. I understand watching the journey is part of the fun but it only applies to films with depth, character, and a compelling story. For example, even though most fanboys of the Star Wars franchise were disappointed by the prequels it was still interesting to watch because of the iconic characters the previous movies established (e.g., Darth Vader, Luke Skywalker, etc.). We wanted to know “How did they get here?” despite the fact that we knew where they would end up.

Ridley Scott is currently working on the prequel to Alien called Prometheus.

The film will be successful (financial speaking) for the same principles, which I mentioned above. The Aliens in Scott’s films were kick-butt wicked and downright scary as h***. Furthermore, Sigourney Weaver’s character, Ellen Ripley, empowered women to the degree that would rival the Feminist movement. So naturally, people are interested in the “How did the Aliens come to being?” because we’re interested in the aliens themselves and the aliens gave rise to Ellen Ripley who was a compelling character.

This bags the question, “Does The Thing carry the same weight?” Although Kurt Russell rocked the house in the original I’ll have to answer that question with, “very little.” Sadly, most Hollywood prequels these days are “cash grabs,” a sorry attempt to make more money and past success. I may check out the movie when it streams on Netflix but not before. And I’ll only check it out to pay homage to the original. But if you decide to go see it before it streams on Netflix, let me know if it stinks.

A review by ScreenRant is here.

Here’s the trailer:

Conversations Part II of II

2011-10-13T07:23:00.000-07:00

For Part I click here.

We had a professor who talked about not “living life within parentheses,” which meant abstaining from the mentality that said, “If I get this over with then I’ll really start living.” Examples could include, “Once I finish college then I’ll start living my ‘real’ life.” Sure, then you’ll miss all the opportunities to build relationships and not see the character-building moments while you’re in college. Another example would be, “Once I get married then I’ll start living my ‘real’ life.” Actually, I thought this very thing in college. In short, it was dumb to think this. That’s not to say marriage hasn’t been wonderful because it has but to believe God’s end goal is to marry us all off is shortsighted (This topic deserves its’ own blog).

My buddy Aaron Brown has taught me a great deal, which is why I love talking to the guy. I remember bouncing theological theories and research topics off of him, as well as tackling the complexities of women together (the last being the hardest). Through our interactions I’ve often appreciated his wisdom and insight into the particulars. It was more than discussing abstract concepts few people cared about but about the deep condition of our hearts and how it affects our perspective. Often times I would vent my frustrations about something and he was almost always able to know what I was feeling but also explain to me why I was feeling that way. He never gave the pop psychobabble, “How does that make you feel?” non-sense. Aaron KNEW how I felt and he KNEW it was important to communicate why I felt those things and often times challenging me, in a tactful manner, to seek the Lord and find resolution with whatever issue I was dealing with at the time. He was always able to shine a light on the path I was traveling. I’m the one who still needs to travel on the path but it’s assuring to know you have friends to help you along the way. There are not many friends who offer a broader scope into life’s mysteries and Aaron Brown happens to be one of the many I have been blessed with. As we’re going through the same life-stages it’s important for me to maintain my relationship with him in order to gain more perspective about life and God. This is what I believe, ultimately, are the purposes of friendship.

I’m truly grateful the Lord brought me to BU and allowed me to harvest friendships that will last an eternity. If there’s a friend who has impacted your life that you haven’t talked to in a while, I’m sure they’ll appreciate a phone call. And you’ll be glad to give one. Besides, with no NBA basketball due to the lockout what else are you going to do with your time?

P.S. – There will be more reflections on my BU days in future blogs. Be on the lookout.

Conversations Part I of II

2011-10-12T15:30:00.000-07:00

Now I’m just as busy as the next person and can easily get caught up with just “doing things” in order to get things done. As a result, I can just as easily forget what’s really important in life, namely, the people that matter most to me.

This past weekend I had a couple of conservations with some old friends who are extremely dear to my heart. I’ll never forget my time at Biola University and how pivotal it was in laying the foundation for the rest of my life. I was a young Christian, confused about many things regarding my faith (e.g., What is God’s calling on my life? How am I to understand and relate to God, intellectually and emotionally? What is the role of the church in my life? Etc.). Through the education in my classes and the mentoring of my professors at BU I was able to figure out most of those things. Of course that doesn’t mean I’ve figured them out exhaustively. But what it does mean is I have a strong theological and biblical foundation to build upon in further study, which I will continue to formulate and synthesize throughout my lifetime.

After graduating from college and entering in the normal hustle and bustle of “real” life you tend to forget the really important things in life because you’re just “busy.” What’s unique about the relationships I’ve developed at BU is that they bring into remembrance God’s entire transformative work in my life during that critical time. The community I still hold dear to my heart is a personification of my personal communion with God. So when I take a moment to speak with friends on the phone who may not live close anymore it forces me to calm down, forget everything else that’s going on in my life, reflect on all of the things I’ve learned at BU and turn my heart to the person on the other side of the phone because they’re the only person that matters at that moment. The close friends from BU act as a “Stone of Remembrance” for me, marking the faithfulness of God throughout my life. I’ve often thought about the many lessons I’ve learned from Aaron Brown. I also think about the conservations I had with Whitney (Uhler) Cox, hearing things from a woman’s perspective and trying to understand its’ complexities, which were many. Trying to figure things out on your own could be frustrating but learning within a community makes the journey worth it.

A couple of weeks ago, Whitney sent out a mass email requesting prayer for her son who was having some health issues (he’s okay now). Instead of replying to an email I decided to give her a call. We talked about all the things we appreciated about BU and the people God brought into our lives. Furthermore, we talked about the ever-changing life-stage most people go through, from being single and in college to graduating looking for a job, getting married, having kids and so forth. Upon reflection, it was ridiculous of me to ever complain about 8am classes or feeling like I never had enough time to get everything done. For some reason we believe that things get simpler as time passes. The exact opposite happens. Things don’t get simpler as we grow up they get more complicated, much more complicated. I understand that’s simply where college students are at and we were all there too. However, with some years under our belt, some time for maturation, and increasing perspective “stressing out” about exams and research papers seem small fry.

Through the conservation with Whitney, however, I realized it wasn’t a waste to “stress out” about typical college things. Actually, it helped lay the foundation for the next stage of life. Living with my roommates and having student responsibilities along with maintaining a part-time job prepared me for adulthood and the responsibilities of being a man taking care of his home. Each life stage you are currently in prepares you for the next. If this is true, then it stands to reason that by putting forth your best efforts in what ever stage you’re in, you’ll be better off when the next one comes.

For Part II click here.

Two Universals, Too Late? - Fringe

2011-10-09T14:01:00.000-07:00

As the TV show Fringe heads into it’s third season we quickly find out the main premise is “Where in the h**l is Peter Bishop?” I don’t watch a lot of TV but I found the second season of Fringe fairly interesting. Here’s a quick summary of season 2’s premise:

In Season 2, the occurrences are found to be in conjunction with activities of a parallel universe, which is plagued by singularities occurring at weakened points of the fabric between worlds. The Fringe team deals with more cases that are leading to a "great storm" as the parallel universe appears to be at war with the prime one, engineered by human-machine hybrid shape-shifters from the parallel universe. Walter is forced to tell Peter that he is from the parallel universe, a replacement for his own Peter that died from a genetic disease, and that it is his prior experiments that caused the singularities in the parallel universe.

Did you get all of that? By the end of Season 3, Peter had entered a machine (one he could only use of course) and opened up the two worlds in order to have everyone work together instead of attempt to blow each other up to preserve their respective universe.

In any show you need an overarching storyline that helps drive the narrative. Within the overarching storyline there are “episodes” used for character development and background information while simultaneously developing the arch. The episodes themselves are essential but should never become more interesting than the overarching storyline developing in the background. As the season progresses the developing arch transitions from the background to the foreground thus revealing the conclusion of the season/story.

The problem in the Season 2 was that the episodes themselves became more interesting than the arch (e.g., parallel universe). After a while, every time an episode made in attempt to give insight into the parallel universe situation it became repetitive and fatiguing. I said to myself, “Alright, already!!! Hurry up and blow up one of the universes so we could move on!!!” At that point, I didn’t even care which universe was going to blow up or which Olivia ends up with Peter.

During this time, you followed Peter and tried to empathize with his internal conflict of which world in belonged to. You see his interaction with his father Walter and his increasing affliction for Olivia. You were pulling for his relationship with Olivia and found that his acceptance of Walter reassuring. You were invested in Peter (and other characters as well).

So guess what happened at the start of Season 4? Here is a summary:

Season 4 begins in an alternate timeline, one in which Peter did not survive his childhood illness in either universe, according to the Observers. Though major events in their past have still occurred to the main characters in this timeline, the exact means by which they occurred has changed without Peter's influence; Walter was released from the mental institution by Olivia, but without any point of stability, has become recluse and unwilling to leave his lab. The Observers note traces of Peter still appearing in this timeline and set out to eradicate them. Meanwhile, the Fringe division in the prime universe discover a new type of shape-shifter similar to those used by the parallel universe.

Sweet! So after being completely invested into Peter and wondering how the doomsday circumstances were going to play he simply “never existed?” Warner Bros. is playing with my emotions more than my ex-girlfriend. I was exhausted by the whole parallel universe situation AND IT’S STILL NOT RESOLVED!!!! Do they really expect me to watch an entire season of “Where in the h**l is Peter Bishop?” that might not be resolved by season’s end? That would be H**L NO!!!

I had high hopes for Fringe but if they’re going to play with my emotions like a crazy girlfriend then I’m playing the “We just need some space” card. I’m going to take a Sabbatical from the show until they resolve some of their issues. Once they “figure some stuff out” we’ll talk but not until then. So then, for now, please let me know if/when they find Peter Bishop. I realize that it could only take one episode but if they’re going to drag that premise out for an entire season I’m not sitting around and waiting.

The Motherland VII - Spiritual Adoption

2011-10-05T15:00:00.000-07:00

For Part VI Click Here.

During my trip to The Motherland, my uncle’s love (aka The Thai Tycoon) and generosity towards me was overwhelming. I couldn’t believe how much he took care of Katie and I and the enjoyment he received from doing so. I thought to myself, “This is how my father should be treating me.” When I was a child, I remember my uncle starting from scratch. Now he’s projected to own half of Thailand by 2016.

On the one hand you have my uncle who started his own business and simply decided, “I’m not going to be poor.” Now he’s branching out and starting different business ventures for the mere challenge of it. Does he need more money? Of course he doesn’t. It’s about next adventures and starting something new and seeing it become successful.

On the other hand, you have my father who decided that gambling was the road to success. As if people winning built Las Vegas. There couldn’t be two sharper contrasts between my uncle and my father. “The plans of the diligent lead to profit as surely as haste leads to poverty” (Prov. 21:5 – NIV). My uncle inspires me. My father simply leaves me nodding my head.

Psychologists would charge me $300 per hour to inform me that I have a host of issues as a result of my family background. I went ahead and saved my money. It’s not that difficult to know when you have a father like mine you’ll probably going to deal with anger, bitterness, and resentment and have abandonment issues. I was a slave to those things. So imagine when I became a Christian and I read:

Because you are sons, God sent the Spirit who calls out, “Abba, Father.” So you are no longer a slave, but a son; and since you are a son, God has made you also an heir. (Galatians 4:6-7 – NIV)

You shall not mistreat any widow or fatherless child. (Exodus 22:22 – ESV)

He executes justice for the fatherless and the widow, and loves the sojourner, giving him food and clothing (Deut. 10:18 – ESV).

Father of the fatherless and protector of widows is God in his holy habitation. (Ps 68:5 –ESV)

These verses probably mean more to me than the average person who grew up with a good father figure. The Lord has healed much of my heart and has given me perspective through the eyes of His sovereign grace. I’m no longer chained to the slavery of abandonment nor ruled by a heart of resentment. I’ve been freed by a Spirit of adoption and filled with a heart of gratitude. I have a different Father and I am my Father’s son.

As an adult, there is victory in my life. I don’t need to follow the same path as my father. I now have a heavenly Father who knows me better than I know myself. But there is a question that remains. How will this affect me as a future parent? I’ve never had to deal with this question because the idea of parenthood was extremely remote. However, as that reality potentially draws closer, I will be faced with that question in the form of a screaming baby in my hands.

I’ve actually thought about this question some. I look at parenthood as an opportunity to see how I might’ve turned out if I had a good father teaching me the things that need to be taught to every child. I don’t fear parenthood as much as I make out. Although I admit this is a recent development. I embrace parenthood knowing it’s an opportunity to break a cycle of abandonment, to begin a different Jamreonvit legacy, and to be the father I never had but always wanted. That doesn’t mean I’ll be the perfect parent. Parenthood doesn’t require perfection but only the understanding of God’s grace poured into your life and how to impart that same grace to your children. That’s going to look different for every individual, for every household but that’s part of the fun . . . trying to figure these things out for yourself.

In conclusion, this trip to the Motherland was an awakening of sorts for me. It was awakening to the realities of who I was, who I am, and ultimately who I will become. Nothing in the past binds me. Yet, everything in the past binds me. How will this all play out? Who knows? God does. That’s why I’ll keep blogging because the fun is figuring this stuff out.

Thank you for all of you who read my blog and who have followed The Motherland series faithfully. I hope that it gives you insight into my life and that it was a source of encouragement. I pray that God ministered to you in some way and even give you some insight into yourself.

Praise Him.

The Motherland VI – Father to the Fatherless

2011-10-05T14:55:00.000-07:00

For Part V Click Here.

There are very few moments in my life when I think extensively about my biological father. My thoughts towards him usually don’t last for more than a couple of minutes at a time. I have vague and unpleasant memories of my father. I also have vague and fragmented memories of my grandparents on that particular side of the family.

During this trip to The Motherland, I learned that my father was from a privileged background. Apparently, my grandparents did fairly well in life financially speaking. It made sense to me when I began putting some of the broken pieces together. The memories of living in a nice house only down the street from my grandparent’s nicer house started to become a little clearer. There were thoughts of my sister and I racing up and down the street and riding rafts to grandpa’s during flooding season.

However, there was one memory that stood out for some reason, namely, the memory of my grandfather’s funeral. It was in Thailand, and I was only a small child. I didn’t have very many memories of my grandparents. During the time of his passing, I just remembered my father being extremely sad. When someone loses a parent, sadness is a normal and legitimate emotional response. I didn’t have a problem with my father mourning over the lost of his father. But there’s a difference between mourning over the lost of a loved one and being completely aloof, coldly detached, and strangely distant from the rest of your family members.

People handle grief differently. I understand that. But the way my father handled his grief during that time was a foreshadowing of things to come. He didn’t take the opportunity to teach his son about the frailty of life, that everyone has a finite amount of time and that time shouldn’t be wasted. He wasn’t a pillar of strength for his family during a difficult time. He wilted under the despair, clearly seen by his son. It left an impression on a young boy beyond his years. Maybe he didn’t bother using it as a teachable moment because I was just a kid. Maybe he understood that those lessons would’ve been far beyond my ability to comprehend. Maybe he simply loved his father and no longer having him was just too much to bear.

If that were the case, those valuable lessons every son needs to learn never came. Incidentally, shortly after that time, I have little memory of my father ever being around. I’ve only met with him a hand-full of times in my life. From what my family tells me, he squandered his inheritance from his father’s estate, never was able to stick to a job, and had major gambling issues. He sounds like a real role model.

Maybe that’s why it was difficult for me to cope with my emotions growing up. Maybe that’s why it was hard to deal with rejection from girls in high school and college. Maybe that’s why it was burdensome to connect with my mom at a young age. It might be that my father never taught me these things. Worst yet, maybe my father DID teach me these things by being absent and detached. It’s no coincidence I was absent and detached throughout my teenage years. I tried to never take responsibility for myself and made every effort to look for the easy way out. I was my father’s son.

Throughout the years I would occasionally get a phone call from him. The phone calls were never “How are you doing?” type of calls. The phone calls were usually my father giving me some sob story of how he fell on hard times and needed some money. Sweet! As you could imagine, the phone calls didn’t last very long. A lasting memory of my father that I have burned into my cranium was the time shortly after my mother passed away. He called and said, “I’m sorry about your mother, do you have money I could borrow?” For a split second I actually thought my father had some decency in him after all when he said, “I’m sorry about your mother . . . “ but then when he proceeded to ask for money in the same breath I was speechless. He never asked me if I were dating anyone when I was growing up. He never asked how college was going. I didn’t hear from him when I graduated with two Master’s degrees from grad school. Not a word from him when I got married. He doesn’t even know I just bought a house. But when my mom passed away, her body not yet laid to rest, my father thought it was a good time to ask for some money. Amazing. I didn’t respond but simply handed the phone back to my sister Vicky.

I’ll never forget that phone call. It was the last time I spoke to my father. My sister Vicky refuses to give him my new contact information even though he’s asked several times. I think a lot about that moment more then I care to admit. The reason is because there’s a part of me that wants to ask him, “Do you have no decency? …no dignity as a man? Your son’s lasting memory of you is you asking him for money when his mother died. How does that make you feel?” I predict his response would be something like, “So does this mean you’re not giving me any money?”

For the conclusion to The Motherland series click here.

Be Anxious In Everything

2011-09-27T16:47:00.000-07:00

As the school year gets into full swing with the mounting responsibilities that follow, I’m sure I’ll find things to be stressed out about and convince myself that I have it bad. The reality, however, is that God’s goodness and mercy pours over me every waking minute of my life.

Eat Drink and Be Marry

But lets indulge the “stressful” areas of life for a minute and come back to God’s goodness later. First off, I just found out that my favorite restaurant made the “Worst Restaurant in American” list. Sweet! Now every time I invite friends to Cheesecake Factory, instead of it being a beloved gesture of communion and fellowship it’ll suggest to friends and family “Wait a minute! You’re inviting us to the WORST restaurant in America!” Look, I don’t care how these people came up with this list. The food their rocks! I don’t care if each slice of cheesecake has enough calories to feed a small village for a month. If I cared about my health at that particular moment, I wouldn’t be going to Cheesecake Factory.

In the same vein, Jesus was against drunkenness. However in the 2nd chapter of the gospel of John, Jesus turned water into wine. Why? If He were against drunkenness this would seem counterproductive. But it wasn’t… because it was a wedding and weddings call for cerebration (Cerebration = Wine). So if you’re going to cerebration with friends and/or family, it won’t hurt to have a slice of cheesecake every now and again, just don’t get drunk off the cheesecake and we’ll be fine.

Death and Taxes

Secondly, I recently started a Tax class that H & R Block offers. This is preparation for my Tax class for the CFP program at UCLA. After attending the first class session I thought to myself, “What the h**l did I get myself into?” The class meets on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday nights from 6pm-9pm. Usually, classes that meet really late at night let you out early. So does this class let you out early? Nope. It’s going to be intense, and I have no background in the subject. In addition, the President’s proposed tax plan is going to almost make this class irrelevant because of the potential changes. Consequently, the proposed tax plan has also made the stock market extremely volatile, which could have long-term affects on the already slowly recovering economy. This is stressing me out on two fronts. First, I have investments both long and short-term that will be effected by this plan, namely, getting screwed by taxes and I’m not even in the “wealthy bracket.” Secondly, this will discourage other people from investing because they’ll get screwed over in taxes, thus slowing the economic recovery while making the market stagnate at best or send it plummeting back down at worst. Sweet! Never thought I’d see the day when I actually cared about politics. My wife is rubbing off on me.

Moreover, as if the class wasn't stressful already, there are people in the class who talk very loudly. I can't believe there are full-grown adults are so oblivious to their surroundings. This class goes until Thanksgiving. What's the over/under in weeks before I punch someone's lights out? Three? Four? Four and a half? How do you kindly say, "Shut up . . . you're getting on everyone's nerves and you don't even realize it!" to someone? Please enlighten me.

Life Without NBA Basketball

Third of my list is the fact that the NBA is nearing the third month of the lockout and training camp is only two weeks away. The entire season could be canceled if the owners and players don’t come to a solution quickly.

I grew up in the heart of East Los Angeles with my buddies Dom and Bryan. None of us had any Christian influence, and Dom and I were from broken homes. Bryan was Bryan. Given the facts, you’d think that we would end up dead at a very young age. However, by God’s sovereign grace and mercy we ended up turning out semi-okay (Well, at least Dom and I did anyway).

One of the ways that the Lord kept us from getting in trouble was giving us a love for basketball. Although we still managed to still find a fair share of trouble, I could only imagine if we didn’t have basketball the kind of trouble we would’ve been in. The love for the game wasn’t restricted to just playing, even though we worked hard and put in several hours of play well. We also loved watching the game at the highest level. And the highest level of basketball is the National Basketball Association (“The Association” for short).

I know I’ve had friends and relatives tell me before about how much they dislike the NBA for whatever silly reason, but I really don’t care about their opinion. Loving The Association helped keep my boys and I out of trouble during a time when we were young and vulnerable, living in a place where trouble seeks out victims to consume. Instead of going out and getting in trouble we got together to watch games. It’s no coincidence that we most often got into trouble during the off-season when we had more time on our hands. So, The Association has some meaning for me well beyond a mere game. It helped unify and strengthen friendships that I still have today. It gave me heroes to look up to when I had no father figure. It gave me fond memories of my mother and I going to Laker games together. It gives me a starting point to initiate conservation with other basketball fans and build relationships. It gives me the perspective of viewing basketball as not only a sport but also an Art to be appreciated. Finally, the life lessons that can be drawn from the game are too numerous to count.

Now as the current NBA Lockout threatens the 2011-2012 season, I’m supposed to sit back and not care? If you think that, then I don’t know what you’re smoking but I have to cry “Foul!”

The other night I was watching my father-in-law (aka Big Pappa) go on a college football binge with his buddy from church. After the third straight college football game both of them were dosing in and out of la la land looking like they were about to fall into a coma. It made me think about the days when I went basketball bingeing. I miss basketball. This lockout has been like a dark cloud over my head the entire summer. Now that we’re about to start losing actual games, I feel this big hole right in the middle of me.

I check out ESPN’s website for updated news, and even the website is getting awkward because they’re trying to scrape up material to write and all they can do is rank all 450 NBA players. Like I care about who is ranked 421st in the league, really? Some of you might be saying, “Why don’t you just watch college basketball?” My reply would be, “Did you see the championship game, Butler vs. UConn, last year?” That was some of the ugliest basketball I’ve ever seen. Kevin Durant would’ve scored 125 points in that game. I don’t want to settle for JV. I want to see basketball at the highest level and that means NBA basketball!

My mother-in-law has already asked me what I am going to do without basketball. For the first time in my life, I had no answer, no comment, no quick-witted humor, no response, no comeback, nothing! I searched and searched. Still nothing. I simply have no comeback when billionaires and millionaires don't know how to split 4.5 billion dollars annually during an economy so crippled that unemployment rates are highest in decades. It's indefensible and down right depressing for the NBA fan. Especially if I can't even offer a witty comeback.

Perspective

Are there bigger problems in the world? Of course there are. Sometimes we get so caught up in our little world that we forget the struggles of others and fail to see the blessings, which are right in front of our faces. As I mentioned before, I am showered by the goodness of God every day of my life. Every breath is a gift from Him. I have a good job teaching young children not only academics but also social skills that will help them function in real world situations. I have the most beautiful and wonderful wife in the world who puts up with all my non-sense. I have a great church and godly leaders who also put up with all my non-sense. And I don’t think I could ask for a better group of friends even though they’re currently scattered throughout the United States.

I know that I want to pour myself into the lives of other young men, feeling as if they could benefit from the theological training I received from Biola University and Talbot School of Theology. There are always seasons when things get rough but they’re always for a purpose. The Lord doesn’t allow for “randomness.” There’s a purpose in everything that happens and knowing that God is both sovereign AND good, we can rest assured and confidently say, “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us” (Rom. 8:18 – NIV).

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. (Philippians 4:6)

This Week In Movies

2011-09-23T16:37:00.000-07:00

If you know me personally you’ll know that I love movies and I love to dissect them like the frog in my high school Biology class (which I hardly showed up for). Well, I should say that I love good movies and if you’ve been following my blog for any amount of time you’ll know I complain quite a bit on the quality, or lack thereof, of movies lately. Let’s take a quick look at what’s out this week.

Abduction

When Lionsgate decide to make Abduction with Twilight heart-throb Taylor Lautner, I immediately thought this movie was going to be a Twilight version of the Jason Bourne movies (which rocked!). If you’re going to make an action flick you better make sure to market it to men who watch to see someone kicking some tail. When you cast Taylor Lautner as the lead character you’re slapping men who enjoy action flicks in the face. And I don’t like getting slapped in the face. We have the common sense to know when Lautner is the lead in a movie the studio is marketing to young women. Thanks but no thanks. I’ll take a pass. Although I have a feeling my buddy Bryan will go to this stupid move because he has daughters. Good luck.

Read Abduction reviews here.

Moneyball

There are only two things I know about Major League Baseball. First, I live in L.A. so I know the Dodgers are currently awful. The second thing is everyone seems to hate the Yankees for some reason. Outside of those two things you could convince me Babe Ruth was still playing. However, the movie Moneyball seems interesting. I know it seems like the typical “Bad News Bears” us against the world typical sports movie but I like movie that challenges the conventional type of thinking in order to achieve greatness. Besides, Brad Pitt is in the movie. Yes, I’m a heterosexual man AND a Brad Pitt fan. Also, my buddy Chris Hunt is an A’s fan and we haven’t hung out for a while. This would be a perfect excuse to get him out of the house.

Read Moneyball reviews here.

Machine Gun Preacher

The title alone sparks interest. As a Christian man I have a problem with a preacher using any type of gun. But there is something in me that wants to see how this plays out. A former drug-dealer and criminal comes to know Christ and decides to become a missionary in East Africa sounds astonishing. Of course this is Hollywood, which is notorious for taking good premises and running them into the ground. I’m taking the “open but cautious” approach, which usually means I’m renting it.

Reviews were not available.

Motherland V – A Mother’s Legacy

2011-09-23T07:18:00.000-07:00

For part IV Click Here.

Realizing that your nationality is a gift from God to use for His glory totally explains my mom’s passion for her people. She was an evangelist to the core but there was a particular passion for her people, Thai people. She was never prideful about being Thai, she just enjoyed it, loved it and cherished it. She didn’t have tattoos written in Thai (nothing wrong with tattoos, by the way). She didn’t marginalize people for not being Thai. It didn’t matter to my mom who you were or where you came from; if you didn’t know Jesus you were going to hear about Him. And even if you already knew Jesus you were still going to hear about Him. I’ve often said that if George Whitefield were an Asian woman he would be my mother.

My mom’s plan was to retire from working here in the States and then become a full-time missionary in Thailand. I would’ve loved to see her passion lived out. I’ve always wondered why the Lord didn’t allow this to happen. “Look at all the people she could’ve led to You, Lord!” I would say. But that wasn’t in the plans. As I went to Thailand bearing that in mind, I remembered the faces of people she shared the gospel of Christ with. I remembered the people she led to the Lord. I remembered the church she attended in Bangkok. And above all, I remembered her passion for Thailand and her people. I always thought her passion for Thailand and Thai people was, “Her thing.” I had my own “thing,” which I wanted to accomplish, my own plans.

In my previous post, I mentioned my own realization that our nationality is a gift from God and that I’ve come to love my “Thai-ness.” During this trip, that reality was brought home for me. My uncle (aka The Thai Tycoon), the one who will own half of Thailand by 2016, built another warehouse for his fireworks company outside the city of Bangkok. It was in a neighborhood my mom enjoyed because of the open fields and nice weather. The warehouse was colossal. He basically built it from the ground up and is currently building another one. My uncle gave us the tour of the facilities, showing us the offices and the unfinished portions, describing what they would look like afterwards.

In a small section of the premises, my uncle had built shacks as living accommodations for some of his workers. They may look sad initially, but when compared to where those workers would be living without working for my uncle, they are far better. I immediately thought about what my mom would do if she were there on the grounds. There’s no doubt in my mind she would have been in the kitchen cooking tons of food and taking it to the workers everyday. And you know what else? You guessed it. She’d be preaching the gospel of Christ to every single person and loving every minute of it. Although she would have known that she had workers to cook for her or do anything else for her, she would have refused and said, “I can do this myself . . . just give me my Thai Bible! I need to preach!” She would have been a living example of coming to serve instead of being served.

Speaking of my mom, my uncle (her younger brother) showed me the second story of the warehouse right above his office. He told me that he built the entire second story just for my mom. He walked me through the master bedroom, the living room, and the guest room he had built. It was all for my mom. My uncle relished the opportunity to give back to his big sister for taking care of him for all those years. Sadly, she would never get the opportunity to use it.

I stood in the master bedroom for a while and I couldn’t move. Then I slowly walked around imaging how my mom would have set up the room, how she would have packed things and allowed them to clutter, where she would sit and read her Bible, the closet she would have sat in, constantly praying for me and wondering when I’d ever get married. I imagined the kinds of books she would have had on the shelf, the hundreds of pairs of shoes that my sister stopped wearing that she would have had to wear because she didn’t want them to go to waste, and the pictures of her children (mainly me) she would have had up all around the room. No, I couldn’t move. Completely overcome with emotions, I broke down and cried. My uncle embraced me and told me its okay and said, “You’ll have to be the one to use [the room].” I couldn’t respond but only thought to myself, “Maybe I will. But if I do, I know I’ll have a lot to live up to.”

After wiping off the tears and collecting ourselves, we went down to my uncle’s office and made plans for dinner. He likes making plans for dinner and I like that he likes making plans for dinner because when his favorite nephew is in town, he will spare no expense to make sure I get the royal treatment. And yes, we feasted that night.

Other thoughts regarding my family history came to mind. It was difficult to process while I was there in Bangkok. It was like asking a neurosurgeon in the middle of brain surgery, “Hey, how are you doing that?” and the surgeon giving a look back that says, “Can’t you see I’m in the middle of something?” When you’re in the thick of things it’s difficult to explain. So after getting back home I thought about that moment on the second floor of my uncle’s warehouse and how beautiful my uncle made it for my mom. But instead of wondering why the Lord never allowed it to happen I remember Jesus’ words:

1 Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. 2 My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? 3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am (John 14:1-3 – NIV).

No matter how beautiful we can make our homes here, Jesus has prepared a place far better and beyond our comprehension, which will display His glory in the ultimate way, namely, meeting Him in glory.

But when my mom went home to the Lord, she left something behind. It was the seed of her passion for Thailand, a seed to have a passion for your people. Will that seed grow? I have no way of knowing with certainty. I thought for certain my mom would live to see my children and win countless souls to Christ in Thailand. That dream is gone. But maybe, just maybe . . . the seed she planted in her son might still grow and see that dream someday realized. Maybe.

The Return From The Motherland part IV

2011-09-21T21:48:00.000-07:00

For part III click here.

There probably wasn’t a single moment in Bangkok when my mind wasn’t on twenty different things. Okay, maybe when I was eating I was only thinking about eating but that’s it. Some of my thoughts included seeing my family, having memories of my mother, and wondering about my father.

Seeing my family was one of the most wonderful experiences I’ve had. It’s probably because I’m older and appreciate relationships and family more. In addition, having grown up in a broken home makes me see the value of having a strong family unit, even family outside the immediate sphere of influence. Furthermore, it helped me realize my own ethnicity. There was this sense of “Oh yeah, I’m Thai!” when visiting my family in The Motherland.

Actually, I didn’t even realize that I was Asian until I got to Biola University. Namely because I couldn’t get a date and quickly realized that race was an issue (I’m only semi-joking). But even then I only had the epiphany of “Oh yeah, I’m Asian.” It wasn’t specific like the realization I was “Thai,” which was a much more positive experience. You might be saying, “How could you not know your own ethnicity you moron!” First, I would agree with you that I’m a moron. Secondly, I grew up in East Los Angeles and went to a Middle School and a High School that was predominantly Asian and Hispanic and everyone hated each other equally. Finally, I was born in the United States and like most children who have or had immigrant parent(s), you simply want to fit in as best as possible and sometimes in the process of trying to fit in Western culture you forget your own culture, whether intentionally or unintentionally.

Growing in my appreciation for my “Thai-ness” doesn’t mean that I’ll “go gangster” and have “Thai Pride” tattooed across my chest in Thai letters like some ex-con. However, I’ve not only accepted my own uniqueness but also embraced with joy. I love being Thai and I love much of the culture of Thai people, MY people. This made me think about the Abrahamic Covenant that the Lord had with Israel. Israel was supposed to be a light to the other nations, an example of a Theocracy. Israel was chosen by God to bring other nations under the same Theocracy of Yahweh. The Abrahamic Covenant sought to unite racial differences not by blurring cultural distinctions but by bringing different ethic groups under the banner of One God while maintaining cultural distinctions. The lie that Satan has put in my people is that “You can’t be Thai AND a Christian. It’s a Western religion.” Buddhism is a major part of the culture in Thailand, people associate being Buddhist with being Thai. And I tell them, “No! You can still be Thai AND be a Christian!” The beauty of the Abrahamic Covenant is that it transcends culture without destroying it. Even in the New Testament we have the Apostle Paul’s body analogy regarding the church, namely, that diversity exists within unity (Rom. 12:3-8, 1 Cor. 12:12-17, Eph. 4:11-16).

Yes, I’m created in God’s image and that comes first in the hierarchy of importance regarding the doctrine of humanity. But God also created different ethnic groups and calls all of us to worship Him. The Lord made me Thai for some reason and I’m sure it’s beyond wanting me to enjoy Thai food (although Thai food rocks). There is purpose in everything that the Lord does. Our ethnicity is not “a throw away” in the plan of God. We have it for a reason. Although I don’t fully see the reason for my “Thai-ness” yet, I am at a place where I’m willing to learn and wanting to grow in appreciation for my own uniqueness and seeing how it fits with the bigger picture of the body of Christ.

The Return From The Motherland part III

2011-09-17T13:05:00.000-07:00

Click here for part II.

The beginning of the second leg of our trip started off nicely. My uncle (aka “The Thai Tycoon” or Triple T for short) had purchased breakfast at the resort for us during our entire stay. Sweet! It was wonderful every morning to start the day eating good food and having a nice time talking to my amazing wife. However, that was probably the only relaxing part of our time. As I mentioned before, we did everything at high speed in order to squeeze every minute of everyday like we were making real orange juice.

The Floating Market

It was also a pleasure to see my other uncle (aka The Administrator), who works as an administrator for Toyota overseeing major accounts in major parts of the world not in the United States. Do you know how I know he’s big time? He’s required to play golf with the other bigwigs in the company. Sweet! For a couple days, he brought his wife (auntie Kanda – who speaks five languages fluently) and two boys (my cousins) to go sightseeing. First stop, The Floating Market. It’s a big tourist attraction in Bangkok although the locals hardly ever go. It makes sense. Why would they want to go to a market on the water when they could go to a regular market on land? Whereas the foreigners would say, “We don’t have anything like this at home, lets go to a market that’s actually on water.”

Yes, it is literally a market on different boats, each with different items ranging from fruits, food, and other merchandise that tourists may be interested in. Before we got into the boats we decided to have breakfast, which was a bowl of noodles (or a couple bowls in my case) eaten by the river. Katie even enjoyed the bowl of noodles, until she saw the ladies who served us washing the dishes in the dirty river after we ate (minor detail). I just laughed it off and told her since I’m Thai I was immune to any diseases in Thailand and she’s also immune by virtue of marrying a Thai guy. That’s just how it works.

Once on board the driver (or is it sailor?) had to navigate through narrow lanes of water going from store to store and boat to boat. If there was anything we wanted at either the store or another boat, we simply signaled the driver to stop and then could make our purchase. After some time, more boats started piling up and then traffic jams began to occur. Since there are no traffic lights or road rules to abide by, it was the “every man for myself” mentality. I lost count of how many times I thought we were going to tip over and fall into the dirty river due to crashing into other boats. Furthermore, I couldn’t believe that no matter where we are at, whether by land or sea, we ran into traffic! I HATE traffic!

(Side note: When I came back home I was talking to my brother-in-law, Mike, about the trip and he mentioned seeing the pictures of The Floating Market and recalled seeing the movie Anaconda. He decided he wasn’t about to visit the Floating Market because it looked too similar to where the Anacondas were in the movie. I assured him there were no Anacondas but only crocodiles and most of them weren’t giant crocodiles. They only have those in the Philippines.)

The Old City

Afterwards, my uncle (aka The Administrator) and aunt (aka The Linguist) took us to The Old City north of Bangkok. It’s a place in Bangkok where there are still remnants of . . . you guessed it . . . The Old City. Since I was Thai I was only charged the Thai price. However, foreigners get a price hike at around 500%. You could probably have guessed that it was difficult for my wife to pass as a Thai person.

We took a lot photos and simply enjoyed the sights. Or at least my wife did. I was busy pretending to be in a Mortal Kombat movie and reenacting all the scenes and quoting the video game lines, “Get over here!” “Finish him!” It’s not everyday you get to wander around century old cities and pretend you’re a ninja with superpowers.

Riding Elephants

Now if you’re at The Old City, you simply can’t leave without riding an elephant. Katie’s never rode an elephant before so she was pretty excited about it. As we were waiting in line we noted how cute the elephant looked and wondered how they would make as pets, until we saw the wheelbarrows of elephant feces they hauled off. I don’t think I’ll complain about picking up the dog feces for a while.

Finally, it was our turn, and we climbed up to ride the elephant. Of course we got a block down the road and the driver was already asking for a tip. Really? One block and that requires a tip? No doubt he was thinking, “Hey, this guy is married to a white woman. He MUST be rich.” The cool thing was the elephant extended his truck and grabbed the bill and gave it to his trainer. Smart animal. Why can’t the dogs do this at home?

I felt privileged that I took my wife on her first elephant ride. Now if anything were to happen to me, and my wife remarries, her new (and much less handsome) husband wouldn’t be able to say that. Yes, it was I. I took her across the world and we rode a freakin’ elephant! Going horseback riding isn’t half as exotic. And horses don’t have trunks, so I win.

The Crocodile Farm

The next place we visited was the crocodile farm. The crocodile farm doesn’t only have crocodiles but also tigers and elephants. Mainly, though, it was a farm full of crocodiles. We had an opportunity while we were there to see a show where elephants reenacted ancient war scenes and played soccer. (Interesting combination, I know.)

As we watched the show, I thought to myself, “If elephants can play soccer should we really consider it a sport? I don’t see any elephants dunking a basketball.” After the show you could overpay to feed the elephants sugar sticks, you know, the very sugar sticks that the trainer gives them for free after we’re all gone. Admittedly though, feeding the elephants was fun but not nearly as fun as feeding the crocodiles raw chicken meat while standing on a platform about three feet high directly over them. I know if we were in the States there would probably have been a hundred safety violations. But this isn’t the States, it’s Thailand and that’s how Thai people roll. If there’s money to be made, safety be da****!

You know when you’re at a pond and you throw little pieces of bread to watch the fishes come biting? And when you start throwing bigger pieces they come swarming and start fighting each other over the food? Well, just imagine that but with crocodiles. It was pretty sweet. It was like watching the nature channel but being there live. I wanted to throw a dear in there just to see what would happen. I know I’m horrible.

Believe it or not, we did all that in ONE DAY. So you could imagine by the time Katie and I got to the hotel we didn’t say much to each other and simply crashed. I had dreams of riding a war elephant and fighting giant crocodiles that night, and I didn’t even drink. What a vacation!!! If you think we’re done you’d be wrong . . . more on The Return From the Motherland in the days ahead. Stay tuned.

Where Have All The Good X-Men Films Gone?

2011-09-15T07:19:00.000-07:00

Due to several traumatic experiences during my childhood, I only have a few pleasant memories that are not completely fragmented that I can draw upon every now and again. Some would say it’s “repressed memory,” or “Lacunar amnesia.” Whatever the case, I’m not about to pay a psychologist $350 per hour in order to retrieve memories I probably don’t even want.

However, one of the few good memories during my childhood I still have intact was reading the X-Men comics late at night and watching the cartoons early Saturday morning in my pajamas with a giant bowl of cereal, the entire box to my left and the gallon of milk to my right. I can’t tell you how many bowls of cereal I went through those mornings, only that it was pointless for me to put the milk back in the refrigerator. I was like a drunkard at a bar binge drinking, “Bartender . . . just leave the bottle.”

So you could imagine when 20th Century Fox announced that they were going to make X-Men into a feature film it brought back memories of everything I read in the comics and watched in the shows. It also brought back memories of my cereal/milk binging days.

In the summer of 2000, X-Men the movie was released. Directed by Bryan Singer, it provided a solid foundation for future X-Men movies. The movie itself wasn’t spectacular and it had a few issues, which I won’t get into here, but it was solid and I enjoyed it. Remember, we were still trying to recover from the Joel Schumacher vomit-awful Batman movies that nearly torpedoed the entire comic book movie genre. So “solid” was a good start.

In the summer of 2003, Fox (not surprisingly) released a sequel called X2: X-Men United. Now this film has been one of the few sequels to surpass its’ predecessor in both quality and box office success. The characters were well-developed, the dialogue was good, and it had a decent story. I really liked this movie. Nightcrawer’s opening action sequence in the White House to start the narrative was lights out! The ending also left you excited for future installments.

The X-Men franchise was clearly on solid footing and I couldn’t be more excited to see what the future of X-Men movies had to offer. The franchise took an interesting turn, however, when Bryan Singer decided to jump ship from the franchise that he helped launch into comic book movie glory and went to another beloved comic book character, Superman. Singer said that it was always a boyhood dream to be able to direct a Superman movie. I wonder if those dreams included running the storied character into the ground and the film being both highly criticized and a box office failure? I’m referring to “Superman Returns” in 2006. This was an amazing feet because Warner Bros. has been trying for years to get this franchise off the ground again.

Singer’s actions also had an adverse effect on the X-Men franchise because he left. As a result of his leaving, Fox had to rush the production, complete what was left of the story, and hire a director (Brett Ratner in this case) to pick up the pieces. In 2006, “X-Men: The Last Stand” was released and it was just down right crappy. There’s really no other way to put it. It was so awful that it nearly retrofected my good childhood memories of the X-Men by threatening to turn them into a traumatic experience. Brett Ratner was an awful director but I don’t blame him entirely considering the circumstances.

Of course Fox realized that the X-Men brand was a cash cow and continued to produce X-Movies in the form of X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009) and X-Men: First Class (2011). Wolverine was awful and a sequel, The Wolverine, is due for release some time in 2013. Since I felt like I’ve been burned by the last two X-Movies, I decided to wait for First Class to go to DVD in order to rent it. A franchise can only burn its customers for so long and get away with it. After watching it the other night, I was left unimpressed. Singer came back as a producer for First Class and I was hoping he could help recapture the magic of the first two films. Nope.

First Class was not only a disappointing movie (although Michael Fassbender as a young Erik Lehnsherr/Magneto was outstanding) but it was a disappointment on how the X-Franchise took a turn for the worst. Why do good movie franchises inevitably run themselves into the ground? Maybe it’s all the red tape a film has to go through and all the hands that have to get involved, from the studios, producers, writers, etc. Maybe it’s the system of the film industry that’s broken? Whatever the case, it’s unfortunate.

Is there a lesson in all of this? I say yes. When you have a vision or project, stay the course in much the same way that Christopher Nolan’s reboot Batman franchise has. Nolan has clearly said that his third Bat-film will be his last and that he will bring the trilogy to its conclusion. He started something and now he’s going to finish it. I have no doubts that The Dark Knight Rises will be epic on many levels. It makes me think of things I’ve started and have yet to finish or even things I want to start but wonder if I’ll finish. In either case, regarding my life, I would much rather be a visionary like Chris Nolan, rising a franchise back from the dead and seeing it from start to finish, instead of a short-sighted Bryan Singer, leaving a franchise for dead.

The Return From The Motherland part II

2011-09-14T14:38:00.000-07:00

For Part I Click Here.

After a wonderful week in Phuket we went back to Bangkok to visit family. My family living in Bangkok is all on my mother’s side. I currently have three uncles there, which I talked shortly about in a previous blog .

Now Phuket was relaxing, and Bangkok was anything but relaxing. I don’t mean that we didn’t have a good time because we did, immensely, but we kept a fast pace the whole time we were there. Once we arrived in Bangkok we were stuck in traffic for nearly three hours. It made me feel like I was back home on the I-5.

The original plan was to stay at one of my uncle’s condos. That plan had to be scratched because the condos were going through some renovations. So my uncle, being the Thai Tycoon that he is, arranged for Katie and I to stay at one of the finer Resorts in Bangkok. When he first called to make the reservation, he found out that the resort had no rooms available, but guess what? My uncle is a close friend of the owner of the hotel, and the owner opened up a room for us. Yes, my uncle is very well connected in Thailand (and that’s an understatement). My uncle owns the top Fireworks Company in Bangkok. He also has real estate investments and other business ventures that are too long to list here. I predict that he’ll own half of Thailand by 2016.

My uncle is extremely generous. Actually, he was so generous it was down right overwhelming. I kept thinking about God’s goodness and how the Lord enjoys showering us with His blessings. I’m my uncle’s favorite nephew. I’m his big sister’s son and he loved his sister (my mom). As far as he’s concerned, I’m just an extension of my mom.

The first night we were in Bangkok, we had dinner at a Chinese restaurant, did some catching up and went over the plans for the rest of the week. Afterwards, he just handed me a large sum of money. I didn’t want to take it but he wouldn’t take “no” for an answer. Then I thought to myself, “I can’t believe I was penny-pinching while I was in Phuket.” For example, the resort we were staying at had an arrangement with the local taxi(s). The taxi(s) were not allowed to pick up anyone, which resulted in us basically being forced to use their taxi to the airport. And yes, it was expensive. I thought to myself, “Wait a minute! This is Thailand! There’s got to be someone willing to bend the rules for a discount.” As I walked around town talking to cab drivers and telling them about our plight, one finally said (translated), “Okay, meet me down the hill and make sure that no one sees you.” I replied, “Okay, give me twenty minutes to meet at the rendezvous.” Katie and I proceed to gather our luggage and check out of the resort. As we were walking out to the lobby the resort staff quickly began to usher us to their taxi service like ushers at church putting you in a seat you don’t want to sit in. We told them, “No thanks, we’re going to have a look around first. We’ll be back . . . [the next phrase I said under my breath] in a few years.” As we were carrying all our luggage down this steep hill, I look back and see my wife being a good sport carrying all she had while trying to keep her balance and maintain a good attitude. I yelled back at her, “Remember honey, WE’RE SAVING MON-EY!”

Once we hit the meeting point, the cab driver immediately pulled up in his cab, parked his car in the middle of the street, and popped open the trunk. We started throwing all our bags into the trunk like we were stealing large sums of cash, slammed the trunk, jumped into the back seat, and burning rubber leaving skid marks while making a quick get-away. Total savings? $8.00. While we looked behind to see if anyone was following us I kept saying out loud, “We saved $8.00!!!” You might be thinking, “Why go through all that to save a measly $8.00? That’s not even enough for a coffee date.” Actually, after my uncle simply handed me some cash for just being his nephew, I was thinking the same thing.

As we continued to enjoy the evening my uncle would recall for Katie how difficult I was to please when I was a child, always refusing to eat Thai food and only wanting McDonald’s or steak. Yes, I was a brat. Now that I’m a bit older we actually had adult conversions talking about future plans, business ideas, and retirement. It was a new experience for me to talk about “adult stuff” with my uncle. It was great. It made me appreciate all the things he’s done in his own life and inspired me to do the same thing back home. Katie got a kick out of my interaction with my uncle. She said, “If I were to picture you as a 60-year-old Thai-man with limited English you would totally be your uncle.” After a wonderful dinner and some time catching up with my aunt, uncle, and cousin Pink we were off to bed. The next day began our second leg of the trip.

Click here for part III.

The Return From The Motherland part I

2011-09-05T16:43:00.000-07:00

The trip to Thailand was about two weeks long. We started things out in Phuket, Southern Thailand. It’s a beautiful tropical place. However, it’s also extremely touristy. Actually, you see more foreigners than Thai people there. Fortunately we stayed at the

Avista Resort, which is off the main strip and tucked away on top of the hill keeping us away from the madness. Nice.

Katie's review of the Resort is here.

We had a nice time relaxing at the beaches and enjoying the nice restaurant at the resort. One of the main things to do there was take a boat ride to some of the local islands and go snorkeling. If you know me, you know that I don’t like boats, water, or being anywhere near where a potential shark could be. It also didn’t help that I just got through watching Shark Week on the Discovery channel back at home. I even posted this on my Facebook page:

My wife wants to go snorkeling but I just saw Shark Week ... conflict ahead.

Here are some of the funnier responses I got:

Mike (brother-in-law): Take a pocketknife.

Rory: I wouldn’t worry about it unless you’re dressed like a seal.

Victoria (sister): Oh my goodness! That makes me nervous! I just saw shark week too!!!! Def pocket knife! Remember to punch them in the nose and swim like a mad man!!!! Don't deprive Katie of an exciting once in a lifetime adventure!!!

Andre: Don't worry dude, if it happens just make a movie showing how your still able to play basketball.

David: with a peg leg. ;)

Frankie: If u bit by a shark, then we'll all see u on SHARK WEEK!!

Josie: I saw the episode where the dog got attacked and made it, so I think you'll be just fine :)

Facebook is pretty fun for times like these. It felt like everyone was on vacation with us. In short, we went on the snorkeling trip and visited many of the surrounding islands. They were beautiful with white sands as soft as powder and clear blue, warm water. I hear sharks don’t like warm water. Real nice! During the tour we heard the guide mention that they filmed the movie The Beach there about twenty-seven times. Most importantly, I made it back in one piece.

The rest of the time in Phuket, Katie and I took the local bus and walked around town taking in the sights. The beach was right down the street from the Resort where we were staying. One of the days we spent at the beach, and I simply read a good book and occasionally looked up and admired the beauty of God’s creation. There were moments I was overcome with emotions because I saw not only God’s goodness around me but also upon me; His grace not only sustaining the world and everything in it, but also His grace and kindness toward me as an individual. The fact that I didn’t encounter any sharks was the cherry on top on the Sundae of God’s goodness.

The Book of Colossians

2011-08-24T08:26:00.000-07:00

My church is going through a transition next week by moving to three services instead of two. Furthermore, we are starting a new series by going through the book of Colossians, which I'm extremely excited about. I'm always excited about anything the Apostle Paul writes. This got me thinking. I actually don't have a lot of commentaries on the book of Colossians. Maybe it's time I get a couple of more. Maybe even dust off some of my New Testament Greek study tools. In any case, it's going to be a wonderful time in God's word and I have high hopes for this up-and-coming series. So much so that I already listened to a sermon by John Piper in the first few verses.

The title of the sermon is The Fruit of Hope: Love. Here are some excerpts:

The question we are asking in the month of July is: What is the fruit of Christian hope?

Last week we answered that the fruit of hope is joy, because in Romans 12:12 Paul commands Christians to "rejoice in hope." In other words, God never commands a Christian to be happy if there is nothing to look forward to. But the gospel is the good news that there is always something to look forward to—something so good that any suffering that may be required of us will seem light and momentary by comparison (2 Corinthians 4:17). And since there is always a secure and happy future laid up for the Christian, the command remains in force: Rejoice always, and again I say, Rejoice!

Does Christian Hope Produce Love or Escapism?

You could read or listen to the rest of it here: http://www.desiringgod.org/resource-library/sermons/the-fruit-of-hope-love#/listen/full

Today's message . . . It teaches and shows that a strong confidence in the promises of God and a passionate preference for the joy of heaven over the joy of the world frees a person from worldly self-centeredness, from paralyzing regret and self-pity, from fear and greed and bitterness and despair and laziness and impatience and envy. And in the place of all these sins, hope bears the fruit of love.

I pray that through hearing the word of God, sitting under its' authority, and fellowship with the saints, the Holy Spirit would transform me into a more heavenly-minded person and less into the worldly-minded person I am. I believe this to be God's will and may my love for the things of God and God Himself grow as I am confident that He will answer this prayer.

The Descent Into Airport Hell

2011-08-23T15:50:00.000-07:00

We decided to go with United Airlines on my return trip to the Motherland. I never had to book a flight to Thailand even though I’ve been there a million times. It was always my mother or Tim Dinkins that took that job. I just remember going to the international terminal at LAX every time. So it was an absolute surprise to me when we got dropped off at the international terminal to find out that our flight on United wasn’t leaving from there. Guess what? They still fly international flights out of their own terminal, which was three terminals down. Did our ride already leave? Of course. Did we have to walk all that way through crazy LAX carrying all our luggage? Of course. Was I happy? Of course not. Not a great start to our trip.

When we finally got to the correct terminal we had to go through security like everyone does. All the TSA agents had the “I hate the world and everything in it” look on their faces and were being complete jerks to most people. There was this elderly Asian lady ahead of me in the security line who did know English very well and wasn’t sure whether or not to zip or unzip her luggage while putting it through the scanning machine, so she decided to unzip it. Apparently, you’re only suppose to unzip things that have liquids. By the time she got up to the scanning machine a TSA agent was upset and angrily zipped up her luggage and shoved it through the scanning machine. She was flustered as a result, feeling as if she did something wrong. This could’ve been her first time at LAX, or at any airport for that matter. She clearly didn’t understand English very well, but instead of being patient and gracious in situations like that, I find that often people get angry that they don’t know English and assume that it’s stupidity. I felt like saying to the TSA agent, “Hey jackass, why do you think the rest of the world hates us? Because of jackasses like you! That’s exactly why we need this kind of security.” Then I thought about being thrown into a small room and having my anal cavity checked out and decided to refrain.

I pushed my bag through and something in my bag was unsettling to them so they pulled me aside to open it and check it out. It turned out to be my lotion. A TSA agent grabbed it and started looking at it like it was potentially C4. I calmly told him, “It’s lotion. You know, the stuff that prevents dry skin.” He replied, “It’s too big, you’ll have to check your luggage to keep it or you could leave it here.” With complete apathy I replied, “I’m not checking my bag, so Merry Christmas.”

It blows my mind. TSA agents are already viewed as the “bad guys” at the airports but they’re really looking out for our safety. They know this, so why be jackasses about it? Why have the attitude that says, “I know my job is your safety but I hate you anyway.” Don’t they realize that the terrorists have already won? Maybe they just embraced the villain role like the Miami Heat (we all know how that worked out). But terrorists don’t honestly think they’re going to take over the world. They’re not even trying. All they want is to have us live in fear and change our way of life. Or in this case, make TSA agents into the biggest A-holes in the world and have airport travel sucked into the tenth level of hell. So when we treat each other like jerks, it’s a victory for the terrorists. I say, “Screw that!” and let’s actually treat people with patience and dignity and in so doing we’re saying, “Screw you!” to the terrorists.

About 12 hours later we landed in Tokyo. If you don’t know already, even though you get off an airplane to get to a connecting flight you still have to go through security check again. Once we got to the scanning machine I began to basically undress myself when the Tokyo TSA agent kindly stopped me half way and simply asked me to walk through the metal detector. I said, “You mean you don’t want me to undress in front of everyone so you could humiliate me all in the name of ‘safety’?” With a kind smile he said, “no.” Sweet! Score one for Tokyo airport. But then when my wife and I were trying to find something to eat, and all they had was Japanese food and McDonald’s. Really? In such an international airport that’s all you have? I’m taking that point back.

About 8.5 hours later we finally arrived in Bangkok. I’ve never been to the new airport so this was a new experience for me. And you know what? It’s absolutely beautiful. Especially when you compare it to the old dump they used to have. They had every store you could think of including about twenty-five coffee shops. The layout was nice and the vegetation was even nicer. Score one for the Thai people!

You’re probably thinking, “Are you seriously talking about the airports when you went to Thailand?” I can assure you that this is only a warm-up for the things to come. When you read the blogs on the actually trip you’ll see why. There are about a zillion things I need to process- my mom, my dad, my own nationality, the rest of my family, other family history, the influence of Christianity in Thailand, where can I get some of my favorite Thai desserts, Etc. I promise it’ll be worth the wait. Until then, remember to tell the terrorist “Screw you!” by loving someone today, especially if you are at an airport.

Prayer Progress Report

2011-08-03T13:43:00.000-07:00

As I mentioned at the beginning of summer, I made a goal to have a better prayer life, which usually means praying more. So how’s it going? I’m glad you asked. A couple of weeks ago our church elders challenged the congregation to fast before our Sunday evening communion service at church. The reason for the fast was to pray about being more prayerful. What? Pray about praying? It’s so simple it’s profound! Anyway, unfortunately I couldn’t partake in the church-wide fast because I had to attend my buddy’s wedding. Desiring to still participate, I decided to fast during the week leading up to that weekend. (I wasn’t going to fast during a wedding when Jesus Himself said that it wasn’t an appropriate time to fast. Wedding Time equals Party Time.)

An interesting experience happened during the week long fast (lunch only). The hunger pains were there but it wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. In fact, the hunger pains were a constant reminder of why I was fasting to begin with, namely, improving my prayer life and in so doing improving my relationship with God. Also, I tried to let the hunger pains remind me of God’s presence as well. This way, I didn’t really feel the need to quickly break my fast because I wanted that constant reminder to keep me from acting like a fool.

This experience stirred my interest on the subject of fasting, and I decided to reread John Piper’s book, “A Hunger For God” in order to have a better theological understanding of the topic. I won’t break down every component of the book here but just point out some things that helped me understand fasting a bit better and gave me a continued desire to add fasting as a spiritual discipline. Regarding fasting, Piper says, “The true mortification of our carnal nature is not a simple matter of denial and discipline. It is an internal, spiritual matter of finding more contentment in Christ than in food” (33). Piper goes on to say that it isn’t really about “not eating” either, because food is a gift from God. It’s about saying to the giver that, “You are more satisfying than the gift itself.” So then, fasting doesn’t always need to be about food (or a lack thereof) but simply denying yourself of good things for the ultimate Good Thing, God Himself.

Fasting isn’t often mentioned as a spiritual discipline today because it’s often associated with the mourning and sadness of the Old Testament. Although maybe true, Piper says, “The new fasting, the Christian fasting, is a hunger for all the fullness of God (Eph. 3:19), aroused by the aroma of Jesus’ love and by the taste of God’s goodness in the gospel of Christ (1 Peter 2:2-3)” (42). Fasting could include not watching TV, working out less, or abstaining from anything that you usually fill your time with to focus primarily on the Lord. Ultimately, “the new fasting is the fasting of faith . . . [and] faith is a spiritual feasting on Christ with a view to being so satisfied in him that the power of all other allurements is broken.”

I appreciate that Piper brought out the point about “faith” in fasting. Being a complete glutton myself, it took faith to move forward in my spiritual life in the area of fasting. It’s been an amazing experience that I hope more Christians will share. Truly believing that the power of Christ can break “all other allurements” is indeed satisfying.

Thoughts On Some Up Coming Movies

2011-07-30T13:24:00.000-07:00

I don't know about you but watching the movies that Hollywood is pumping out is like watching McDonalds make their Chicken McNuggets. It's just gross. Okay, so the movie Battleship is a film inspired by the Milton Bradley board game, which James Cameron criticizes Hollywood's lack of creativity. I didn't really need James Cameron to tell me that Hollywood is lacking in the creativity department. I mean, when I was a kid I had the game as well but I don't remember any alien spacecrafts or Brookly Decker in the game. How dumb is it to make a movie off of a board game? Maybe people think that if Disney could a movie franchise based off a ride then there are no bounds. Apparently there are no bounds for good reasoning either. I think I'll take a pass on this one.

The Rise of the Planet of the Apes is a reboot of the Planet of the Apes series in the late 1960(s). I also remember the series when I was a kid. Even as a kid, I remembered the corny dialogue and the K-Mart halloween level ape costumes used for the show. Now there Hollywood decided to reboot this series with an origin story I said to myself, "Why would I watch a movie knowing that in the end we (humans) get our butts kicked." I mean, are we not the good guys? At least I like to think so. At least in Battleship I know that we'll win in the end because any Human vs. Aliens movies we come out on top, right? How in the world is this a selling point for anyone? I've never caught the Harry Potter fever. Boy wizards are just not my thing. But I could understand why others would be into it. But Apes kicking the crap out of us? Out-smarting us? And taking over the world? Really? Who's going to sign up for that? Animal rights activists? The people from PETA? Do they even watch movies?

The Smurfs Movie is already out and you're not going to believe this but it's getting terrible reviews. The people that are young enough to remember the cartoon are now too old to care. Furthermore, if the current kids generation doesn't know about The Smurfs why would they care? This movie is about three decades too late. But this is just another example of Hollywood saying, "We got nothin'."

In the end, I hope that we don't keep watching and paying for crap because Hollywood would making crap and jacking up the prices to boot. It's like Starbucks over-charging for their coffee. If there are people willing to pay, they'll be people willing to sell.

The Christian Dating Scene

2011-07-22T09:19:00.000-07:00

No, this isn’t about the movie The Break Up because I haven’t seen it and have no interest in ever seeing it. This is about “The Christian Dating Scene (CDS).” You know, the scene where we over complicate things and end up with unnecessary heartache. When I was in the CDS I was extremely frustrated by the apparent lack of clear communication between genders. Asking a girl out for coffee has become such a big deal that you feel like it needs local news coverage. Instead of it being a “getting to know you with no expectations in a non-threatening environment” experience, it has become the “pre-proposal stage of a life-long commitment to each other” session. It’s maddening. Once I finally convinced someone to marry me, I told the CDS, “I’m outta here! I’m going to the land flowing with milk and MY honey. Peace!” So anything that happened in the CDS I would say, “What do I care? I’m married now.”

However, I still see the same mistakes made by Christians in the CDS and it’s like watching a Michael Bay film when you know there will be poor dialogue, a bad story and lots of things blowing up. The reason I believe that Christians tend to be poorly equipped in handling dating is because of the lack of training they receive in their churches or from their parents. But I don’t entirely blame the church or our parents either. Here’s why- the social context is in a constant state of flux. Our parents didn’t have to deal with social media or things like Facebook and texting, which accelerate the dating process. They actually had to talk face to face. As a result, they were able to get to know each in more authentic situations by seeing each other in different social contexts and truly seeing the other individual for who they were. Furthermore, when you are having a conversation with someone, you can see their body language, facial expressions, and how they react or engage with certain topics, which helps deepen the communication process. This doesn’t happen as much these days. Now, emailing, posting on someone’s Facebook wall, or texting is considered a form of “communication.” Although a quick way to get a short message across, it does not foster true intimacy. You think you’re getting to know someone when in fact you’re not.

I can’t speak for all churches but my church does an excellent job teaching and preaching the Word of God. But since “dating” isn’t anywhere in the Bible we don’t touch on the topic mcuh. Several years ago we had a “dating conference” addressing the issues with the CDS. After we had the conference you know what happened? Nothing. That was the last I heard of my church addressing the topic. And what do I care? I’m married. But it’s also that very attitude that I believe contributes to the mess that the CDS is still in. We don’t train or equip young Christians to handle the CDS. We believe that if we teach enough Christian principles and preach from the Word of God they’ll be able to figure out how to apply it to their social context. In most cases this is true. But if this is true of Christian dating, then why are there so many Christians who are hurt, left confused, and feel the bitterness or loneliness as a result of miss-handled relationships? If the church (or anyone else for that matter) doesn’t train our Christian singles then they’re left to yahoo dating articles and romantic comedies to help them figure things out. That’s not an inspiring prospect.

It’s a serious issue that very few people address. Yes, there are “bigger” issues to tackle like feeding the hungry, social justice issues, preaching the gospel and the like. But in the midst of these “bigger” (and more important) issues there is an entire demographic in our churches that needs to be ministered to in a very specific way. They need help contextualizing the teaching of God’s word directly and specifically into the dating context. I’ve always wanted to write a book on the topic that’s very different from the Christian Dating books I’ve read (I’ve read more than what I would like to admit.). So maybe I’ll start blogging about some of what I wanted to write. In no way do I feel like an expert in Christian Dating. But it is a topic I have thought long and hard about. As a single Christian man I experienced frustration, loneliness, and defeat in the area of Christian dating. It didn’t matter whether I was simply trying to get a date or was in a dating relationship. My heart was broken several times and it’s never fun. I wasn’t the best in handling relationships myself, also breaking the hearts of others. There were many “not my best moments” moments while in the CDS. Maybe if I had my own book (you know, the one I haven’t written yet), I could’ve avoided a lot of the heartache and non-sense I went through. In addition, I plan on soliciting help from my buddies Jordan Wessling and Aaron Brown (if I can ever get Aaron to call me back). They have great insight into some of the problems and solutions within the CDS that I hope to tap into and synthesize here on my blog.

So let me say this; I’ve addressed that there are issues in the Christian Dating Scene that won’t get any better if left unacknowledged. I will now begin offering some possible solutions to specific situations that I hope will be helpful for young Christians who are tired of all the non-sense, ambiguities, and the general messiness that potential romantic relationships bring. So, next week will be the first in the series The CDS. It will be kind of like The O.C. or Beverly Hills 90210 whatever generation. Instead of trying to complicate things through manipulation and fornication to spike ratings, however, we’ll try and simplify things and honor God in how we handle relationships.

Please feel free to comment away in the comment section and give me your thoughts or questions you may have. Thank you.

35 & Counting

2011-07-15T08:23:00.000-07:00

I recently had my 35th birthday. Holy cow!!! 35!!! When most people find out my age they have two thoughts. Their first thought is, “You look a lot younger.” The second thought is, “You act like you’re still in High School.” And they’re right on both counts. I can’t believe in 5 years I’ll be eligible for the 40 and over league (which I plan on dominating).

My sister’s birthday is actually a day before mine. She’s a year younger. I remember growing up and having to share the party and the birthday cake. I would tell my mom, “Hey, other kids have their own party why can’t I have mine?” To this day I still believe that she planned it that way in order to save time and money by having only to plan one party and buy one cake- a tactic I may use myself when the kids come.

As time passed, I’m not sure when I stopped celebrating my birthday. It just became another day in the life of The Jammer. The birthday party simply lost its luster. I didn’t want to be reminded of inching closer to death. Not to mention you get to a point in your life when, if you plan a birthday party, you usually have to pay for that party. No thanks, I thought. If I wanted to hang out with friends I’d just call them and hang out. Simplicity is beautiful.

I realize that I may sound a little morbid or a complete party pooper. I’m really not. I just don’t care for my own birthday. But one of the great perks of getting married is that you marry into a family, unless that family is crazy of course. My family is only semi-crazy. This year my wife planned a wonderful dinner at the in-laws and invited some friends. We feasted on grilled steak that the father-in-law (aka. The Big Boss Man) grilled up with wonderful sides dishes as well. Food. Is. Good.

My wife baked a cake and had the laborious duty of setting thirty-five candles on it. She could’ve just got the number candles and put a 3 and a 5. Then we could’ve used them again for when the kids are 3 and 5 or when I turn 53. I guess she wanted me to have a challenge in blowing out all those candles. After the cutting of the cake we started opening gifts, most of which were cards and gift cards to Cheesecake Factory. Yes, my family knows me well. My buddy Jason Smith actually gave me a hand made card with different pictures of a day trip we took to Santa Barbara with our wives. It was quite moving. My little niece, Maddie, even gave me a card. It was a drawing of me as an orange stick figure. Maybe she went with orange because she couldn’t tell whether I was yellow or brown. I think orange is a good compromise. I proceed to examine the card and tell her all the nice things about it. My mother-in-law (aka The Mother-In-Law) later told me the way I handled Maddie showed her that I’m going to be a good father someday. I told her, “As long as they don’t cry or ask me for anything I think I’ll be a great parent.”

Upon reflection, I would’ve never thought I’d be here. What do I mean by “here?” If you knew me in high school you would’ve thought that I’d either end up in jail or be some kind of deadbeat and you’d be right. When Christ captured my heart the narrative in my life took a drastic turn. I marvel at the work He’s done in my life and continue to grow in increased wonder at His kindness towards me. As a result of God changing my life, I now have a home, the best wife in the world, and a family that cares enough about me to do something for my birthday. Yes, God is amazing and He desires to do a work within our lives in order to bless us all the more. This is our God. Amazing.

A Journey With Jordan

2011-07-08T15:26:00.000-07:00

One of my close friends (Jordan Wessling), who I consider a brother, is getting married this coming weekend. As his wedding day gets closer and closer I feel more of a burden to pray for him and his soon-to-be wife. Recently, I started reflecting on his life and what he’s meant to me.

There were the days as Undergraduates at Biola University where we simply attend classes and studied all day coming together at night to discuss what we’d learned in class and bounce theological ideas off of each other. There was also the occasional water fight with other students in the same dorm and the constant talk about the “Christian dating scene,” which we could probably write a book about. Hey, that sounds like a good idea!

We even went to graduate school together at Talbot School of Theology, although we were in different programs. We moved to off-campus apartments along with other friends and continued our studies for another couple of years. We never got tired of trying to figure out different theological ideas and the nature of women, the latter being the most ambitious of subjects.

Jordan has helped me grow in my intellectual life, never allowing me to fall into a system of beliefs without truly thinking well about and have good reasons for my beliefs. He would meet complex theological/philosophical issues head-on and often study the night away to figure out answers. Throughout graduate school, we would often try and figure out difficult ideas together and even share our research as we wrote about related or similar topics. We differ quite a bit on some theological issues but regardless of those differences I consider him nothing less than a brother.

Despite being an absolute geek, however, he wasn’t socially awkward. Far from it, he was usually the life of the party. I was always amazed at how he could simply mingle with the crowd no matter what the crowd may be. While undergraduates, he was involved in a ministry that street witnessed to homeless people in Hollywood. He got along with everyone at the dorm we lived in no matter the social group (e.g., artsy, geeks, jocks, etc.). When we moved to off-campus apartments we met an Indian neighbor who had a 22-year-old son with Autism, named Abdul. Abdul was one of the most annoying people I’ve ever met but Jordan handled him with care and Christ-like love often times inviting him into our apartment and cooking him dinner. I’ll never forget the times when I vented my frustrations about my fruitless efforts of pursuing Katie. He would offer advice and patiently listen to my constant wining about it.

To further illustrate our friendship; there was this dark time in our lives called the “Girlfriendless Era.” Jordan got a book by Henry Cloud called, “How to get a date worth keeping” (dumb title). He read it and dissected it like one of his philosophy textbooks. The basic premise of the book was to balance the notion from Joshua Harris’ “I Kiss Dating Good-Bye”(or what I like to call “Saying hello to bad exegesis” or “The Chief end of all men is to avoid dating forever”) that dating isn’t really that bad. Frankly, Cloud wants you to date EVERYONE! It would be beyond the scope of this blog to go any further into the book but Jordan and I simply tried the premise of dating several people, not for the purposes of marriage but for the purpose of simply getting to know other people. By the end of the month we had gone on so many “dates” that we were emotionally exhausted and dead broke as a result of going on these “dates” We would debrief after every “date” and shared our experiences and decided to modify some of Cloud’s ideas because we were tired of going broke (I keep putting “dates” in quotes because it’s not what people normally think of when they hear “date.” Again, I can’t get into right now.). It was a great time of learning and self-discovery. And it was great to walk through that with a friend (Sorry, I cant’ really get into the results right now either because, well, it’s about Jordan right now). He even coined the term “Cloudian Dating.”

Jordan has had commitment issues in the past. So to hear that he’s making the life-long commitment of marriage to the woman he loves is a delight to me. We’re all growing up. I guess it had to happen some time. As a result of Jordan’s marriage, I realize that I’ll be playing a diminished role as a friend. He’s priority is his wife, as it was meant to be. He’ll attend a different church and have different immediate friends with other ministers that will serve as his pastor(s). That’s just the reality of the ever-changing life-stage we all go through. What won’t change is my commitment to Jordan as a friend. I can always commit to praying for him and his marriage, have times for occasional phone calls to catch up and bounce ideas whether theological or practical, and when time permits, enjoy each other’s company and reminisce of pre-mortgage days and when our wives used to think we were funny.

One of the most memorable times during my wedding weekend was the morning of my wedding day when I spent it with my groomsmen (Jordan being one of them of course). It was a time of “sober joy” in which we had fun but we also took it seriously. My guys shared some difficult things about both their failures and successes as a husband. No one was being pretentious but simply being real. Their desire for me to not make the same mistakes but share in the wonderful experience of a good marriage that honors God was clearly evident.

Jordan hasn’t given a lot of thought on how he wants to structure this weekend. It’s maddening. But that’s also Jordan and you simply just roll with it. This weekend, I’m here to support him and do anything that’s asked of me. I look forward to his new advantage and will be there every step he needs me to be in whatever capacity. I’m just grateful that I get to play a small part of a weekend that I hope he won’t soon forget. If I had a drink in my hand I would lift it up right now and give a toast. You know what? Lets do it. Right now I’m holding up a Mike’s Hard Lemonade and saying, “To Jordan, one of my most dearest friends, you think too much, you’re flakey, and you didn’t help clean up the apartment nearly enough. But I love you to death and wouldn’t want you any other way (expect maybe help clean up a little more). Cheers."

What A Day Part II of II

2011-07-06T21:09:00.000-07:00

Click here for Part I

Moreover, that was only the first part of my day. I had to get to my second job (working at my sister’s 7-11 store). My sister Vicky had me train a 17-year-old girl who was working there for the first time. The store is located in the heart of East Los Angeles, not really the best part of town. Great. I had to wear my “big brother” hat as well as my “be nice to A-holes” hat.

This was 4th of July weekend so the store was as busy as the freeway I just got off. As I was showing the new employee the ropes I also had to make sure the 1700 people in the store weren’t stealing, the slurpee machines were all working, and help the 85-year-old woman pick out all her scratcher tickets. I’m truly astonished by people who actually think they’re going to win big with these scratcher tickets or lotto tickets. If most of those people started doing the math, for every $10 they win they probably spent about $100.

For several hours it was a complete madhouse but by the grace of God I was able to maintain my composure although there were several times I wanted to light up some of the customers. Like the drunk guy who couldn’t fill out his lotto sheet because he was too drunk. The line was out the door and this guy wanted me to fill out his lotto sheet for him. I said, “Sure, would you like me to make dinner reservations for you too?” Or the young guys trying to flirt with the new worker. I had to interrupt them mid-sentence saying, “Would you like a bag? (before they could reply) No? Okay have a nice day. Next in line please.” Then there was the dude that didn’t even know how to play the scratcher tickets he bought and wanted me to check to see if he won. Really? Isn’t that like going up to a blackjack table and not knowing what the cards mean? Everyone, including the dealer, would think you’re in idiot and they would be right.

At the end of my shift, I took a deep breath and was thankful the Lord got me through that day as I drove home in my air-conditioning-busted car. What a day, indeed. I’m hoping the Insurance field will help me out of my second job. Even though I love my sister to death and enjoy helping her business succeed, if I continue to work there any longer I might commit a homicide. However, regardless of the rough spots on this day, it was a good day.

What A Day Part I of II

2011-07-06T21:08:00.000-07:00

I recently finished my first finance class on Personal Financial Planning. The class got me interested in the Life Insurance field so I signed up to take the Licensing Exam in L.A. The exam was on a Friday and I was studying like crazy that week staying up late nights and thinking to myself, “What in the world did I get myself into?”

Studying for this exam brought me back to my college days at Biola University. However, instead of my college buddies keeping me company during the late nights it was the dog (Buddy) that stayed up with me. It’s probably more productive that way. During college, when the exam got closer and closer I would get stressed out and start trying to distract my buddies from studying. Since there wasn’t anyone to distract I had to focus on studying. Bummer. During the late nights, while Buddy was trying his best to stay awake he would fall sound asleep by my feet. While asleep he would begin dreaming about whatever dogs dream about. I know this because his eyes were closed but he was still growling.

Finally the morning of the exam arrived. I got up extra early to get some more time in studying. Googled the directions to the test site in L.A. and took my wife’s GPS. The test was at 1pm and I left about two hours early. The Google directions and the GPS were saying two different things but I didn’t realize that until half way there. Despite leaving two hours early I was pressed for time. Only in L.A. is there “rush hour traffic” without it being rush hour. My air conditioning is currently not working so it felt like a million degrees in my car. If I’m late for the exam they close the doors and you have to reschedule.

Let’s recap: I’m running out of time despite leaving early, stuck in L.A. traffic while confused about the directions, and it’s a million degrees. That’s not exactly what you want to be going through before taking a big exam you’ve been studying for all week.

I had to call my wife for clarification on the directions. I mean we are talking about downtown L.A., not exactly the easiest place to get around if you don’t know where you’re going. After getting off the freeway, I decided to follow the GPS and it directed me right into a single lane construction site over a set of train tracks. Guess what? . . . wait for it . . . a train arrived and the one lane ceased to move. I was shaking my head in complete frustration while a Cal-Trans worker saw me and sympathized with me by saying, “That’s Eff(ed) up huh?” I nodded in agreement.

After the train finally passed by I was praying up a storm. Not so much in seeking the Lord that things will work out but to repent from cussing up a storm from the train delay. I finally got to the building and parked across the street for $9.00. Normally I wouldn’t mind parking further away if it meant not paying for parking but since I was pressed for time I gladly paid.

Entering the building there was a security check, of course. I finally made it to the test room after 27 total turns within the building. Despite the angst I made sure that I was friendly to everyone. Apparently, the workers there didn’t feel obligated to do the same. You simply hand them your ID and they check your name off of a list and tell you to sit at a computer. If you ask for help they have the “I can’t believe you’re asking for help on something you’ve never done” type of attitude.

Finding my computer I logged in with my password and begin the exam. The test site condition was slightly above a meth-lab and guess what? The air conditioning was not working and everyone was complaining about it. Sweet! Instead of listening to everyone complaining about the lack of air conditioning I thought about the time while I was in High School playing summer league. It was a tournament at Whittier High School and we played three games in one day (9am, 11am, then 1pm). The gym was about a million degrees but we played through it and won all three games. I said to myself “If I went through that basketball tournament I could go through this.” I love this game, so many life lessons to be learned.

I quickly finished the test with 33 minutes to spare. You turn in your paperwork back in the front and the employees rudely tell you to sit in the waiting room. After about another 30 minutes of waiting a person comes out with a batch of papers, which are the test results. They proceed to call people’s names but because of the lack of toner in the printer they had to tell you whether you passed or not in front of everyone. So I watched with eager anticipation as several people went up to receive their test results with a couple of “It looks like you passed” and a couple of “Sorry you didn’t(s).” The person handing out the results completely butchered my name, not surprising, and tells me I passed and to proceed to finger printing.

I joyfully walk up to the fingerprinting lady and tell her “Hello, how are you doing?” She says, “Fine” with a “Why the h*ll are you talking to me?” tone. So I just shut up and let her take my fingerprints. As I do cartwheels all the way to the parking lot I realize I actually paid $9.00 for parking and become upset again. In perspective though:

Life Insurance Exam = $37.00
Fingerprint scan = $60.95
Parking = $9.00
Passing your exam on the first try? = Priceless

My wife packed me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with some trail mix. Remember that it was a million degrees so when I got to the car all the chocolate in the trail mix had melted to the point where I couldn’t open the bag because it was so sticky. Fortunately the peanut butter and jelly sandwich made it. Now I have the “pleasure” of driving out of downtown L.A. traffic while eating my sandwich. I don’t get how some people think that honking their horns in anger repeatedly and flipping every off would help move traffic along. I would simply tip my sandwich to them as I passed by.

Click here for Part II

The Summer of Prayer

2011-07-05T22:18:00.000-07:00

It’s summer time! Oh wait. I have to teach summer school for the second straight year. Maybe I shouldn’t be that excited. Last year, I missed out on a vacation with the family to Mammoth, a beautiful place I’ve never been to. Sweet. Of course I had a close encounter with God while teaching nine boys with Autism. Go figure.

Despite teaching summer school again, I always have goals that I set for myself for the summer time (e.g., How much can I bench press? How high can I jump? How much can I improve my shot? How could I read the pick-and-roll better? How many books can I read off my “must read” list? How many people can I dunk on? Okay, I made that last one up but you get the point.).

I recently finished 2 Samuel and at the end of the book, king David angered the Lord for “numbering the people” (2 Sam. 24:1). The Lord sent a pestilence (an Angel) that killed 70,000 people. David admitted that he did something foolish (ya think?) and built an altar to the Lord. David then sought to purchase a sacrifice off a guy named Araunah. Araunah offered it to David for free but David said, “No, but I will surely buy it from you for a price, for I will not offer burnt offerings to the Lord my God which cost me nothing” (24:24). The rest of the chapter goes:

David built there an altar to the Lord and offered burnt offerings and peace offerings. Thus the Lord was moved by prayer for the land, and the plague was held back from Israel (24:25 - emphasis added).

I was, again, amazed that God could actually be moved by our prayers. In addition, my church is starting a preaching series on Prayer. So far, it’s been extremely helpful. My prayer life has always been inconsistent and at times, a downright struggle. So this summer, instead of having goals that really don’t mean that much in the eternal picture of things, my goal is to bolster my prayer life in a way that my soul will benefit as much as my body does from hours at the gym.

The elders of my church have done an outstanding job of teaching us about prayer. Instead of giving you an exposition on prayer right now, let me just tell you that it’s a struggle for me. If God weren’t real, there are still many benefits to being a Christian. There is a social benefit from meeting with people at church. There is an educational benefit from reading our Bibles. But if God weren’t real, then prayer makes no sense. At the core of my struggle is simply a lack of faith in believing that God truly hears my prayers and answers them (even though I don’t always like the answer).

I don’t know what bolstering my prayer life will look like or what “results” I’ll have. Maybe that’s the difficulty of it all. When I hit the weight room I not only see the results but I also feel stronger. I’ve gone through seasons in my life with rich prayer time but don’t “see” or “feel” any different. Maybe I’m not supposed to see or feel anything and simply believe that I’m honoring God with my prayer time. Even though I don’t have everything figured out, I know that through my prayer time, time in the Word of God, and listening to the sermons at my church it might all come to me. In the meantime, I’m just going to enjoy concentrating on praying for things I know I need to be praying for. And maybe that’s what it’s all about, simply enjoying that time with God and allowing your mind to meditate on things that really matter.

This may be especially true now that the NBA is headed towards a lockout and we might not even have a season next year. I even asked my wife, “What am I going to do if we lose the season to a lockout?” She replied, “Pay more attention to me or I’m locking YOU out.” Well then, without an NBA season I could simply devote myself to my wife, more prayer, and time in God’s word. Or maybe I’ll just pray that the lockout could be avoided completely. Either way, I know in the grand scheme of things that it’s the state of my soul and my relationship with Jesus is what matters, not the state of the NBA. Of course if the Lakers get Dwight Howard in a trade this summer, I’ll recant the previous paragraph.

That’s A Wrap

2011-06-29T19:15:00.000-07:00

What a great NBA season!!! And an even better NBA Finals! In the aftermath there has already been plenty of ink spilled over Lebron’s 4th quarter disappearing act, his post game comments, and everything else All-Lebron. Sadly, the Dallas Mavericks, you know the team that won, are almost an afterthought. Dallas Coach, Rick Carlisle said it best, “When are we going to stop talking about the reality show that is Lebron James? And when are we going to start talking about this team?” Emphasis on the word “team.”

I don’t want to talk about Lebron. Throughout the Finals it felt like the Miami Heat were Wade’s team anyway. I want to talk about the big picture. There’s a reason why everyone outside Miami wanted the Heat to lose. There’s a reason why most people are rejoicing and happy to see players like Dirk Nowitzki and Jason Kidd win a championship. There are people giving Rick Carlisle his due for an outstanding coaching job and rightfully so.

Most of us know about The Decision 11 months ago by Lebron James, Miami’s “Welcome Party” and Lebron predicting “not 5 . . . not 6 . . . not 7” championships (maybe you should've stopped at "not 1?"), and Wade and Lebron mocking Dirk’s sickness in front of the Dallas camera crew before game 5.

Bill Simmons said it best:

Let's say you're in college and one of your buddies says, "See that girl over there? I'm taking her home tonight. And I'm doing this because I'm the funniest and best-looking guy in this room." And let's say he's COMPLETELY serious. Guess what you're doing if it doesn't happen? You're making fun of him. Relentlessly. Really, that's what 50 percent of the Miami-related vitriol was about; the other 50 percent was because LeBron tried to stack the deck by playing with his biggest rival (we didn't respect it), and because he broke Cleveland's hearts on national TV (we didn't like it). To this day, LeBron hasn't shown any real regret about last summer; that's the main reason everyone rooted against him. He couldn't handle it. He caved. And now we're here.

People hate arrogance and see humility as a virtue. It’s rare to see a superstar in Dirk, who is humble and uncomfortable with getting attention. When he left the court at the end of game 6 to be by himself, no doubt to weep uncontrollably because he was overcome with emotions, the team had to convince him to come back out. Dirk would’ve been completely content being by himself with his thoughts and the 13 years of pain as a result of coming up short for all those years. After coming out of the locker room, Dirk received his Finals MVP trophy, well deserved. The camera cut to Dirk’s shooting coach Holger Geshwindner standing there observing the cerebration while tearing up. It was the look of a proud father who has put in all the hard work in his son and realizing the blood, sweat, and painful tears was all worth that exact moment. It made me think, “How does EVERYONE not love this game?” It’s so much more than basketball but the story of human emotions and epic tales triumphs and failures.

We look at Miami and see arrogance and entitlement. We cheer Dallas because their star is humble and his supporting cast knew their role. The “Team” beat out “Pure Talent” once again. But what does this say about us as society? Doesn’t this point out to some objective reality that arrogance is bad and humility is good? Anyway.

Now with the NBA Draft over and the NBA heading towards a lockout and possibly losing an entire season it’s caused me to reflect more on why I love this game because, you know, we may not have it much longer. The virtues in basketball are often direct parallels to virtues that could be found in everyday life, which is another reason why I love the game so much.

For the record, I don’t think Lebron is a bad person just a 26-year-old who has been worshipped his entire life who lacks some self-awareness. Okay, enough about Lebron. My point is there are always good narratives throughout the NBA. It’s not just a game but stories within stories that are interesting, complying, and often times (for me) provoking. Whether it’s the Lebron James “taking his talents to South Beach” story, Derrick Rose rising to superstar statue or Dirk’s journey to redemption, the narratives aren’t scripted, which is the beauty of watching the stories unfold before your very eyes as they take shape in front of you. Lets hope these stories continue and not end because of the lockout. That would be a bad ending to any story.

The Return to The Motherland

2011-06-10T06:57:00.000-07:00

It’s official. I’m taking my wife to The Motherland – Thailand, in order to see my people. I honestly thought about when this would happen ever since we got married. There’s this sense of obligation to take her there in order for her to see a special side of me. Yes, looking at the price of airline tickets made me want to vomit but when else were we going to go? We plan on “starting a family” this time next year (I hate that phrase. Why does it only become “a family” when you have kids? Why can’t it just be my wife and I and the dogs? I mean besides the fact that I hate the dogs.). So we needed to do this now before the kids come and ruin our lives.

Furthermore, I know if my mom were still alive she would’ve FORCED me to take her to The Motherland and tell me how much of a tightwad I am and to quit complaining about the price. My mom would’ve come along and “shown her the town” and displayed her passion to see her people hear the Gospel of Jesus Christ. It was truly a beautiful thing to watch. She would share the gospel with whomever she came into contact with. You simply wondered, with deep conviction, why you didn’t have the same passion. She also would’ve made some phone calls and made me preach at about twenty different Christian churches. I would then be thinking, “I didn’t know there were twenty different Christian churches in Thailand.” She would’ve also taken us to restaurants that no GPS could even find and she would probably know the owner as well. I’m missing my mom as I’m writing this.

Truthfully, this trip makes me a little nervous because my mom isn’t here. She was the one who planned the trips and set the itinerary. Even during my mission trip with Tim Dinkins in the summer of 2005 (the last time I was there), he was the one who set the itinerary. Like my wedding, my wife does the planning and I just show up. It can’t work that way this time because she’s never been to The Motherland. The responsibility falls on me to make sure this trip is productive and fun for my wife. This goes against my philosophy to avoid responsibility at all cost but I realize that this trip should be an experience that my wife will forever remember as 1) a trip to meet part of her new family on her husband’s side 2) experiencing fun and exciting new things 3) and seeing a side of her husband that she would never get to see otherwise. Daunting, but I think I’m up for it (maybe).

Having family in Thailand is great. I talk about my uncles quite a bit. One happens to have several business ventures. One day, I’m just going to spend an entire summer there and ask him to teach me how to make money. I call him, “Uncle Fat Cat.” He speaks Chinese, French, and Thai (of course) but his English is down right awful. Every time he tries to speak to me in English I just tell him to speak to me in Thai because it’s painful to listen. It’s like he’s having a seizure every time he tries to annunciate something. I have another uncle who’s a big time manager over at Toyota. I call him “Uncle Big Time Toyota” or “UNK-BTT” for short. He’s in charge of all the accounts in most of Asia. Yet, he won’t hook me up with a car. Yes, my uncles have deep pockets but they don’t give handouts. Maybe that’s why they have deep pockets. I have a third uncle in Thailand. He’s a wild card, that’s why I call him “Uncle Wild Card.” The reason that he’s a wild card is because I have no idea what in the world he does and he refuses to tell me. So I make-believe that he’s a manager of an underground fight club. I haven’t even mentioned my aunts and crazy cousins yet. This should be interesting.

My wife has never been to Thailand and has always wanted to go. As I’ve already mentioned, if we don’t go now we’ll probably never end up going. It’s an opportunity for me to show my wife (white-blonde-from-California) the inner workings of the Thai culture. She loves experiencing new and exciting things and I think a trip like this qualifies. I want to give her memories that she’ll cherish forever, memories she could look back on before the kids come and ruin our lives. She gets excited with the thought of visiting The Floating Market, riding Elephants in the wilderness, seeing exotic beaches and rafting down wild rivers, all of which is yawn-city for me because I’ve done those things a thousand times (Well, I don’t get tired of exotic beaches but still.). Most people at this point say, “How could you EVER get tired of doing things like that?” My response is, “It’s the equivalent of people in Orange County who get tired of Disneyland.” People who don’t live in or around the OC get excited about the thought of going to Disneyland. Although I don’t live in Bangkok, it’s the same thing with riding Elephants and visiting The Floating Market. Furthermore, I remember watching a Thai-horror movie as a kid with a giant alligator attacking and eating people at The Floating Market. It scared me from ever wanting to go to The Floating Market the same way Jaws scared me from ever wanting to swim in the ocean. It was so bad I didn’t want to even swim in swimming pools. I know I have issues but lets move on.

I never really look at myself and notice that I’m Thai. I just think I’m “me” plain and simple. However, there is something about our heritage that informs us about a little of who we are. I don’t agree with the idea that we need to find our complete identity in our ethos, but I also don’t agree we should completely forget about it. God created us with diversity for a reason and I’ve learned to embrace that very unique part of me- although if I had my choice, I would be 6’8 with a Lebron-type of build and talent. Instead, God choose me to be a 5’10 Thai-guy with little to no talent. Whatever. I’m over it (sort of). Maybe my wife leaves this trip knowing the Thai culture a little better and as a result knows me a little better. For an amazing woman such as her who loves me the way she does, that might be worth the whole trip. You know, before the kids come and ruin our lives.

Ceremonial Travesty

2011-05-27T06:59:00.000-07:00

Graduating from college is a great accomplishment. However, graduating ceremonies somehow don’t quite invoke the feeling that something great has happened. Instead, graduation ceremonies usually elicit dread, angst, and an overwhelming feeling of “Lets get this over with” attitude by all parties involved. There’s got to be a better way to do this, right? I know what would fix it. Two words: Open Bar.

Recently I attended the Cal State Fullerton graduation ceremony for my brother-in-law, Jon Davis. Now I’ve been to plenty of GC(s) to know how this is going to play out. Thankfully, CSFU separates academic departments in order to have smaller ceremonies, which is a great idea, because if they hadn’t the entire school we would’ve been there all day, and I would’ve committed a homicide.

I have no idea why GC(s) need to be as long as they are regardless of how many people there are. Why does the staff need to be introduced? It’s great to show them appreciation for educating our students but no one at that particular time cares or will remember. Why do we need the same generic “Go now and change the world with this new found power” speech? During these economic times it should be, “Good luck trying to find a job.”

To keep myself from going completely insane I did two things. First was imagining Dwight Howard in a Lakers’ uniform. Secondly, I decided I was going to log Jon’s GC in this blog. So here we go.

On the drive over the father-in-law (aka The Chief) was driving like he was in the Daytona 500. I still don’t know how he has a better driving record than I do when I never break 40. We arrive at the parking lot and of course we have to walk about 17 blocks to get to the ceremonial site. By now everyone has to use the bathroom and since there are a million people on campus, no sensible college would actually open their real bathrooms to the public. Instead, they had porta potties. Classy.

I tried to handle my business as quickly as possible and held my breath like I was sinking on the Titanic. As I came out, the mother-in-law (aka. The mother-in-law) asked me, “Is it nasty?” I replied, “It’s a porta potty, of course it’s nasty.” At least CSFU was nice enough to also include a portable sink. As you know, though, portable sinks only have a finite amount of water. So guess when it ran out of water? That’s right, when I went to use it. Wonderful.

The family finally finds a nice spot where we can’t see a da** thing. We’re there on time but guess what? That’s right, the GC started late. Not only are they unnecessarily long they also never start on time. In order to pass the time, the family started talking about where to eat afterwards. Apparently, the mother-in-law made reservations at Cheesecake Factory at noon and Taps in Brea at 1:30 in case we missed the noon appointment. Savvy. When the mother-in-law mentioned that the Taps appointment would cost $33 per plate The Chief had a look on his face like someone just took a dump on the hood of his truck. It was priceless. The mother-in-law quickly reminded him that they didn’t pay anything for Jon’s education because of his full-academic scholarship and when Becky graduates they could go to McDonald’s. I thought to myself, “That’s a great way to look at it. When Becky graduates in 2014 I’ll have an excuse to order Chicken McNuggets again.” Maybe by that time they’ll decide to use real chicken. I’m not holding my breath.

As the GC begins, there is always the mention of the rules about how to conduct yourself during the ceremony (e.g., no standing, no running up and down the aisles, no flashing, etc.), which the majority of people decide they’re going to break anyway because . . . well . . . it’s their baby graduating so rules no longer apply to them. The way some parents conduct themselves at GC(s) is worse than a Little League games sometimes. Shortly after, Jon texted us, “Get me the h*ll out of here,” which immediately followed by the chair of the department announcing and acknowledging “Jon Elden Davis III” for receiving a full-academic scholarship (I’m not making this up).

After several hours of announcing name after name after name after name and parents reacting like groupies following a rock band we noticed that we could see the end of the line. I was rooting for the end of the line knowing that it’s a sign of free cheesecake getting closer. Once the last name was announced everyone celebrated like it was 1999. We all thought it was over. Then an administrator asked everyone to sit back down but was taken aback when the reaction was a chorus of boos. I was yelling, “We have reservations!!! What do you think you’re doing!? I want my cheesecake!!!” There were a few parents that gave me the look of death, you know, the same parents that were breaking all the rules of conduct during the ceremony. My wife had to pull me down to sit before they called security. I honesty thought there was going to be a riot. Apparently, the administrator didn’t get the memo that everyone in attendance doesn’t care about 99.9% of everything that goes on. They’re there only for their kid and that’s it. Adding insult to injury, the person reading the final speech couldn’t read English and took an additional 20 minutes. Pure torture.

In conclusion, I’ll never minimize the accomplishment of graduating from college because so few people do it. I wouldn’t have gone to my own GC if my buddy Aaron Brown hadn’t talked me into it. Anyway, congrats to my brother-in-law Jon Davis for finishing his college career. I’m certainly glad that I married into a family that expects nothing less from their children. The Chief was clearly proud but he also had the demeanor that said, “This is just one of many more accomplishments that my son will achieve.” This got me thinking. Maybe I should have higher aspirations for my own future son instead of simply not landing in jail? In any case, we only have one more graduation to attend, which is Becky’s. She’s not due until 2014. By then, hopefully I’ll figure out a way to sneak in alcohol or they’ll just adopt my Open Bar idea.

The Home Stretch

2011-05-23T20:13:00.000-07:00

One of the wonderful benefits of being a teacher is being on the academic calendar. There is a clear start and finish to each year and there is something refreshing about that. During this time of year, which I call “the home stretch,” mental and emotional fatigue begins to settle in, and it gets harder and harder to get out of bed every morning. This year in particular, I’ve felt like hitting the wall unlike in years past. I had a co-worker tell me today, “You look woren.” “Is it that obvious?” I replied. I have been trying to medicate myself by adding bacon to every meal.

Maybe it’s working a second job, trying to finish up my teaching credential, studying at UCLA (live campus – I dislike online classes) to get my certificate in financial planning (CFP), helping lead our Grace Group (home bible study), and the Lakers season going up in flames that’s contributed. In addition, I’m preparing for a basketball tournament at the end of the month so I’m putting in extra hours at the gym.

Maybe I’m over committed to too many different things. I probably should cut back on some things. Whatever the case, summer is almost here and there are about 25 days left in the school year. Summer is truly the light at the end of the tunnel that gives hope to all teachers (as well as students). By this time, most families are planning their vacations, California State Testing (CST) is over, and the students are almost completely checked out, you know, like the Lakers checked out at the end of the season. Anyway, I don’t think I’m being over ambitious.

By late June, I’ll be finished with my teaching credential, which is a big accomplishment considering that most of those education classes were like being trapped in a Saw movie. I wanted to saw off my own foot several times throughout the program and probably would’ve if I actually had a saw handy. By the end of June I’ll have my Life Insurance license, which is a key component to financial planning. Furthermore, I’ll have more time to focus on my 2nd career as a CFP (I know that I need to write a blog about this and I will soon), get some sleep, and drive my wife crazy.

It’s just my motto of “Work hard now, Play even harder later.” And everything I do is setting up that motto to become a reality. In retrospect, it’s been a great year. The kids were great (most of them), the parents were nice (most of them), and the year went rather smoothly (most of the time). So into the summer I’ll be taking memories from this year such as the time Diego (2nd grader) said, “Mr. Jay, I want to learn how to count, so I could count my money, so I could become a police officer, so I could eat doughnuts.” I replied by saying, “Yes, it’s important to count your money and eat doughnuts.”

Or the time when I had a 5th grade girl say to me, “Mr. Jay, what’s wrong with your Lakers? They’re falling apart” with me quickly making her write standards the rest of the hour while chanting, “Ko-be, Ko-be, Ko-be.”

Or the time I was in a Kindergarten class, my memory of the kids telling each other “Relax! You gotta RE-LAX when you’re at school,” instead of going to their teacher all the time to resolve their relational conflict. Hearing 5 yr-old(s) say that to each other never gets old.

Also, watching the student mature throughout the year is a rewarding feeling. Or at least the ones that actually mature. I try to have high expectations with them, push them hard and have fun in the midst of all the madness that goes on during the school year. I guess, for right now, there's nothing else I would rather be doing. Especially now that the Lakers' season went up in smoke.

In short, I have 25 more days left- then some much needed rest, a little bit more work, and some play and we’ll do it all over again next year (hopefully, if they hire me back).

The Newlywed Panel

2011-05-14T08:57:00.000-07:00

My wife and I were recently asked by our friends to be on a “Newlywed Panel” at church for a Q & A for young couples who are either engaged or have been married under two years. I find it absolutely hilarious that anyone would ask any type of input about anything from an idiot like myself. But, as our friends continued to explain, “We need more diversity on the panel,” translation: “We only have white people on the panel because we are a pre-dominantly white church and you’re the only Thai-guy at church who happens to be married.” Okay, that makes more sense to me. My wife and I happily accepted even though being chosen was based on “Affirmative Action.”

The panel is this weekend and we were emailed a list of possible questions that might be asked in order to start thinking about them now. I had no idea they actually wanted us to be thoughtful in our responses. I might not have accepted. In any case, I thought this would be a good idea to answer some of the questions here as I verbally (written) process important aspects of my marriage so far because, you know, I barely made the cut-off of being married for slightly over two years.

Disclaimer: The answers to these questions are unique to that of my wife and I and in no way reflect what needs to be done in all marriages unless otherwise stated.

Questions:
How have you found ways to still make time in your day to be alone with the Lord now that you are sharing a schedule?

It actually hasn’t changed for me because I’ve always read my Bible either in the afternoon (during lunch) or late at night. My wife goes to bed around 7pm (or at least it feels like she does) and gets up at 4am (or at least it feels like it). While she’s asleep I’m wide-awake, and while I’m asleep she’s wide-awake. That actually works out for personal devotional times, although I don’t even try and have conservation with her past 7pm because she’s completely incoherent by then.

Did you minimize your commitments to ministry involvement to spend more time with each other?

I minimized my commitments before I was married. My philosophy of avoiding responsibility hasn’t changed because I got married. Although, strangely, I find myself committed to more things despite my endeavor to avoid it… God’s sovereignty I guess.

What are ways you have found to help foster intimacy and vulnerability in your marriage?

I think my wife is hot. Therefore, I don't need to "foster" intimacy. Vulnerability? Lets move on.

What was the hardest adjustment you each made as you transitioned into married life?

I can’t speak for my wife but the hardest adjustment for me was adopting two dogs I didn’t want and having to continue to pretend I actually like them, which takes a lot of emotional energy.

What is the most unexpected thing you’ve learned since getting married?

Sex isn’t everything. Yes, that was truly unexpected.

What surprised you most about your spouse?

. . . that she actually wanted to marry me.

What is the biggest conflict that you disagree on right now? How have you been working through it?

After the Lakers’ season went up in flames, I went full-bore sackcloth and ashes and mourned for a couple of days. My wife finally said, “Okay, you haven’t talked to me, hugged me, acknowledged me, or helped around the house since the Lakers lost!!! I’m your wife!!! I HATE you!!!” Okay, I made the last sentence up, but still. Now I don’t expect any woman to understand a man’s connection with his team so why bother trying to explain it? It’s just going to make them irate. You simply learn which battles to fight and this wasn’t one of them. I just acknowledged that she was probably right and started pretending that I wasn’t still dying inside and praying to God that we could somehow get Dwight Howard in a trade this summer.

What is a daily/weekly habit that you do together or for each other?

We each have things we do around the house for each other. For example, I mow the lawn, take out the trash, and pick up the dog feces, you know, the dogs that I didn’t want. She cooks, cleans, and runs the dogs. It truly feels like we’re a team simply “doing life” together. She’s the Gasol to my Kobe (except this year, of course).

What is the best advice you could give for the honeymoon?

Sex isn’t everything.

What advice do you have about leaving and cleaving in relation to in-laws?

That would depend on the in-laws. If they are crazy then leavvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvve! Don’t look back. They’re only going to suck the life out of you. If they are semi-sane or solid Christians, then drawing from their experience and allowing them to support you would only help you grow as a married couple. My in-laws have been great. They’ve been supportive and have assisted in our transition to married life. Most importantly, they’ve provided cable television.

For the men: What have you learned about what leadership of your wife looks like?

Being in the leadership role comes with it a lot of responsibility. A good husband/leader may look different from person to person but the things that are essential are a strong devotional life with the Lord, relying on prayer, and having godly peers that will keep you accountable. Everything else is just details. And remember, sex isn’t everything.

A Tribute to Paula Jo Dinkins

2011-05-08T08:08:00.000-07:00

The Dinkins family will always have a special connection with me because they are a missionary family from Thailand. That’s right, Thailand! I met Tim Dinkins at Biola University and even went on a mission trip to Thailand, Chiang Mai, with him and his sister Amber in the summer of 2005.

During that summer trip, we became closer and built a bond. It was funny to see how Thai-people reacted to a white guy (Tim) speaking to them in Thai with the expression that said, “I can’t believe I’m talking to a white guy in Thai” on their faces. Although we don’t talk regularly anymore, I know that Tim will always be that special Thai/White brother I never expected to have. Through Tim I met his wonderful parents, Larry and Paula Dinkins. They immediately fell in love with me and constantly encouraged me to pursue ministries and use the gifts that God gave me. They also built a great connection with my mother. Larry and Paula’s passion for ministering to Thai people was clear and evident. It didn’t matter if Thai people were in California or Bangkok, they were going to love on these people with the love of Christ.

When my mom passed away, I remember Larry, Paula and Tim attending the funeral and mourning with me. I had no doubts that they, particularly Paula, would be praying for my family and me constantly. Shortly after my mother’s funeral, I visited with the Dinkins family and we talked about the wonderful memories we had regarding my mom and the impact she had for the kingdom of God. I remember it like it was yesterday.

Recently, Paula Jo Dinkins passed away and vivid memories of my own mom returned. All the wonderfully shared moments I had with Paula also came to mind. Here is an excerpt of her life:

Paula Jo Dinkins, 59, passed into the presence of Jesus Christ, the Savior she loved and served, on March 30, 2011 after a nine-year battle with Multiple Myeloma (MM). Paula is the feminine form of ‘Paul’, and like the apostle we can say that she has fought the good fight, and has finished the course, and has kept the faith (2 Tim. 4:7). Now she has fully entered the joy of the Lord in very presence of God.

Dealing with MM is no small task. However, Paula Dinkins clearly did not “waste her cancer” but, by the power of the Holy Spirit, used it for God’s glory.

Paula truly “bloomed where she was planted” (even in difficult soil). Part of her coping mechanism was to keep her passions aglow as well as maintaining a keen sense of humor (Paula received the most humorous award her senior year in high school). She channeled her passions into her home church, local Thai churches, . . . monthly OMF prayer meetings, and a bi-monthly evangelistic knitting circle called, “Pearling with Paula.” Paula’s garden, handcrafts, and tea were other passions as she volunteered in the herb garden at the Huntington Library, painted canvases, designed stationary, and knitted masterpieces. In March, Paula reached the milestone of 600 visits to Curves, a place where she built relationships with many new acquaintances. She loved sharing Christ with strangers. On her final deputation trip to Dallas Seminary in early March she led a man on the plane to the Lord.

Paula was able to do this because she had a passion for the Word of God, which can be seen by the 35 personal Quiet Time journals collected shortly after her death. Larry Dinkins says this about his wife, “Paula introduced herself as the ‘Woman behind the man, the missionary wife and mother of four missionary kids.’ As her husband, I could not have asked for a more supportive and loving wife.” I hope the life of Paula will be an inspiration to all the young Christian ladies out there.

I had the opportunity to speak to Tim shortly after Paula’s funeral. It was no doubt a difficult time for Tim, as well as the rest of his family, but there was this sense of joy in him that I marveled at. When we saw one another we embraced each other like the good old college buddies we are. I didn’t say anything at first but simply looked at him, while firmly griping his shoulder in affirmation, with an expression that said, “I am extremely blessed to have known you as a brother in the Lord and your faithfulness this day builds my faith.” There was a slight pause to take in the moment, and then Tim told me, “Our mom(s) are talking about us in heaven right now.” I replied laughing saying, “Yes, they have a lot to talk about.” Realizing that they were hundreds of people waiting to talk to each family member, I kept it short and quickly moved to the reception area where they had all the food.

While I was cutting in front of the food line gathering everything I can while making it fit on the tiny plates they gave us, I was reminiscing about the direct contrast between a funeral of a Christian and the funeral of a non-Christian. Yes, we grieve at the loss of loved ones but not as others who have no hope (1 Thess. 4:13). As time passes and more loved ones pass away, despite the pain, it makes the return of Christ that much sweeter.

An Excellent Wife

2011-05-06T07:05:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of responsibilities placed on a man, especially a man trying to live for the glory of God. There are all kinds of things that attack his identity and pulls at his affections in all kinds of different directions. One of the things that can be a drain on him is a shameful, argumentative, and contentious wife. In contrast, an excellent wife could be someone who strengthens the character of the man in an edifying, life-giving, and honoring manner.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones. (Proverbs 12:4 ESV)

I noticed that there are no gray areas in this particular verse. Your wife is either your “crown” or she brings you shame and weakens your very bones. But what does the wife being a “crown” for the husband mean?

In the ancient world, crowns were made of very costly material, symbolizing royalty and sovereignty. I don’t think it is referring to a “trophy wife,” a wife who simply stands there and looks pretty. Once, I asked my buddy Chris Hunt while he was engaged, “What is it about Katie (his girlfriend at the time) that makes you want to spend the rest of your life with her?” He replied, “She makes me feel a hundred feet tall.” I think my buddy Chris’ reply helps to illustrate how the wife is a “crown” to the husband. There is something empowering when you are crowned. The crown represents power and honor.

This is in direct contrast to the idea that “it is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife” (21:9). This is a parallel in meaning with the “continual dripping” in 19:13. The effect of the passage illustrates how a wife’s argumentative habit makes the husband’s life a constant irritation. These passages, no doubt, serve as a warning to young men seeking a wife to not marry someone crazy. As a person who has dated crazy women before, this is sound advice.

All this to say is that my wife is my “crown.” She is understanding and supportive. I’m currently working two jobs and go to school full-time. She also has a career and is attending school full-time. You can imagine that we don’t always get to spend a lot of time together. The other night on my way home from the 2nd job, I asked her if it was okay for me to workout because I hadn’t worked out in a couple of days due to the insane schedule. Some wives would turn into a gun-blazing, vampire warrior faster than Kate Beckinsale in the Underworld movies. But not my wife. She was perfectly fine with me working out late because she understands that’s a big part of my life. This meant the world to me. I felt empowered, and I was extremely grateful. The workout helped my body and mind to recharge. Interestingly, on my way home from that workout I contemplated all the many blessings I have in my life, and my wife was at the top of the list.

Speaking of a list . . . here are a few things that my wife does without fail. She gets me breakfast every morning, runs the dogs about 20 miles a week, reads her bible at 5am every morning, works out like an Olympic athlete, eats healthy food, makes me eat healthy food, cooks dinner every night, prepares lunch for me the next morning, makes more money than I do, edits my blogs and removes anything offensive, has embraced the Lakers as her own, keeps the house clean (including cleaning up all the dog vomit), does the laundry, tells me that she loves me everyday, and actually believes I’ll make a good father someday (stranger things have happened).

If you’re wondering, “What do YOU do in this marriage?” Well, this blog isn’t about me, right?

Possession and Joy

2011-04-09T23:03:00.000-07:00

One of the most amazing passages, to me, is Isaiah chapter 61. Unpacking everything in this chapter would take too long for this blog so I'll only mention a couple of things. Throughout the first half of the book of Isaiah, there has been great judgment pronounced by the Lord to the nation of Israel. Historically speaking, “rebuilding the ancient ruins” was a great comfort to Israel since their city (nation) laid in ruin. Although the physically restoration comes in the form of Israel becoming a nation again, the spiritual promise to all of God’s people of becoming “oak(s) of righteousness” and “priest” and “ministers of our God” (v. 6) is of eternal value.

The imagery of restoration is that of wealth, possession, and affluence in verse 6b-7 also points to signs of not only prosperity in this present life but also for the one to come. If the pre-fall world and 2nd coming of Christ world show the same types of imagery of affluence for God’s people then it stands to reason that God wants to bless us in some capacity in order to catch glimpses of the eternal. This also further displays God's grace in kindness towards His people. Although sin ran rampant throughout the nation of Israel, it did not reign in God's deep desire to bless His people.

Another point in the opening chapter the Lord says, “For you will be like an oak whose leaf fades away or as a garden that has no water” (Is. 1:30) because of the unrighteousness and injustice practiced among them (1:21). But now we arrive to chapter 61, one of the most amazing passages of restoration and transformation from “an oak whose leaf fades away” to becoming “oaks of righteousness” (61:3). How is this possible? It’s possible because it is the Lord that does “the planting, . . . that He may be glorified.”

If you were to ask some of my close friends how to describe me they probably wouldn’t use the phrase, “oak of righteousness.” I’m fully aware of my shortcomings daily and, at times, it could get extremely frustrating. But remember, it’s the Lord’s work and He’s not done and He promises to finish and give us garments of “salvation” and “righteousness” (61:10) and the judgment due to us will be lifted. This of course is looking to the future work of Christ in the New Testament. But the fact that it is being mentioned here in the Old Testament, I find amazing.

In affirming that the Lord does the work in us in no way frees us from our personal responsibilities. In trusting divine sovereignty we do not neglect human responsibly. Oswalk puts it this way:

Most of us want God’s power for holy living while retaining a firm grip on the steering wheel of our lives. We would like to be “better” Christians but are unwilling to become bond-slaves. God’s awesome power to be loving when we are not loved, to be kind in the midst of cruelty, to be clean in the midst of filth, to be self-forgetful when everything around us says to “take care of yourself at all costs” is not available to those who would use it for their own ends.

Passages in the New Testament also confirm the tension between our acts and God’s power:

Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good. (Titus 2:13-14)

What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? (James 2:14)

May our conduct and works reflect the power of God that works within us.

A 2nd Job Part II of II

2011-04-07T22:11:00.000-07:00

For Part I Click Here

Interestingly, people still come up to me and give me their condolences regarding my mom. They also tell stories about how wonderful she was for the community. She was an icon in East Los Angeles. Yes, I miss her very much. My sister has a picture of her in the office. The first couple of weeks it was difficult to see the picture because it was a reminder that she’s no longer here. But it’s also a reminder that her kids are keeping up the family business and are working together to do they best they can without her. I think she would be proud.

An unexpected opportunity to share the gospel has also come from going back to the store. I still have friends in the old neighborhood that come by. It’s been great to be able to share the gospel the way my mom did her last few years. Speaking of the gospel, isn’t it at the heart of the gospel to love the unlovable? Isn’t that what the Lord did with us, . . . though we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

The apostle Paul says, “I am a debtor both to Greeks and to barbarians, both to wise and to unwise” (Romans 1:14 – NKJV). To be in debt means to owe someone something (e.g., mortgage, student loans, etc.), usually to a creditor. The Lord gave Paul grace so why, in this passage, would he call himself a “debtor” to Greeks and Barbarians? A clue in answering this question is in the first verse of chapter one where it says, “Paul, a servant of Christ Jesus, called to be an apostle and set apart for the gospel of God” (1:1 – NIV – emphasis added). Paul didn’t call himself nor did he set apart himself. It was God doing the work in Paul’s heart. Paul didn’t qualify for the grace of God nor did he do anything to be disqualified from the grace of God, “it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast.”

The beauty of receiving God’s grace is not that we owe God anything but that it wipes out what we did owe by virtue of our sins. So then, the “debt” we now owe is to offer this amazing grace to other unqualified people, to the Greeks and Barbarians and selfish customers of our day. Understanding this grace we have received will show in how we greet and interact with people. If we understand grace we won’t cut our eyes towards people for their differences or selfishness, feeling like we “qualified” for God’s grace while they didn’t.

Now, putting hands and feet to this wonderful concept of receiving God’s grace while working at a 7-11 store in the middle of East Los Angeles means I will show patience and compassion for everyone, knowing that I didn’t qualify for the grace of God. No matter how moronically a customer behaves, I need to extend grace because I am a “debtor” to them. It’s not because they gave me anything but because “His divine power has given to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us by glory and virtue.”

A 2nd Job Part I of II

2011-04-07T22:05:00.000-07:00

If you’ve been following this blog for any amount of time you’ll know that I’m terrified at the prospect of parenthood. So my defense mechanism is to make fun of parenthood. But this isn’t about parenthood (sort of). One of the prospects that I find frightening is the loss of one income (the wife’s – who actually makes more than I do) and the addition of an expense (Junior Jr.). Yes, I just referred to my future child as “an expense.” And I will certainly remind him of this when I’m bailing him out of jail.

Instead of waiting to end up in the negative, I decided to get a second job and start saving for the bail bond now. The easiest way to a second job is to work for my sister, Vicky (only I can refer to her as “Vicky” and everyone else has to call her “Victoria.”), who took over our beloved mother’s 7-11 store. I don’t need to be trained because I worked there as a teenager. I also remember absolutely hating working there and having to convince my mom NOT to leave the store to me by threatening her that I would sell it for pennies on the dollar when she passed away.

Vicky was always better at managing the store anyway. I never had the stomach for all the nonsense that goes on with running a store. Actually, that was one of the reasons why I went to college, to get out of that hellhole. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciated how the Lord provided everything for us through that 7-11 but I just hated working there. At this point, you might be asking, “If you hate working there so much, why are you going back?” Good question. The first reason I mentioned- it is the easiest job to get without any additional training involved. Secondly, I can spend more time with my sister. Although she’s consistently going 100 mph and worrying about 45 different things all at once, it’s still nice to see her. Finally, I felt that it’s been years since I last worked there and had hoped my maturity (if any) would help reign in my pure hatred for working there.

If you’re wondering why I hated it so much, it was because I was a lazy teenager who didn’t like to work at all. In addition to that mindset come along annoying and evil customers. Now, not all customers are annoying and evil. Actually the vast majority of customers are just average-hard-working-Americans-with-decency. But it’s those few that make my skin crawl. For example, there’s always that 70-year-old lady who holds up the line by wanting 57 different types of lottery scratchers because she has nothing better to do with her time. I love the fact they only come in when it’s really busy, too. Or, how about individuals who want to have their Lotto tickets checked but their tickets looks like they’ve been through the washer so the machine can’t read them? Here’s the thing that bothers me, if you truly believe that playing the Lotto might win you millions of dollars, wouldn’t you guard that ticket accordingly instead of allowing it to become so damaged the machine can’t even read it? Now if you don’t believe you’re going to win, then why play it at all? Most people who play the Lotto play it regularly. What they don’t realize is that if they simply invested that same money they would probably be wealthy.

Lotto sheets can print out 10 draws on one sheet. But there’s always THAT GUY who wants to have them printed out in single sheets. The dialogue usually goes like this:

Me: “Hello, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I would like a $5 Lotto ticket but instead of printing it on one sheet, saving time and paper, I would like you to print them on 5 single sheets thus holding up the line and annoying everyone around me.”

Me: “No problem, sir. Would you like a punch in the face with that?”

Not everything bad is Lotto related. Consider, for example, the customer who gets caught stealing and begins to become defensive and says, “I don’t know how that got into my pocket.” Or the homeless person laying in the parking lot that you kindly ask to leave and tells you to “Eff off, this is a free country!” Okay, technically the homeless dude isn’t a customer but still.

Or the person that insists that the coffee must be fresh, which apparently means made at the time of his arrival instead of 20 seconds ago. We definitely have different ideas of what “fresh” means.

I remember the time when we used to have to serve the Big Gulps and Slurpees behind the counter. Now the customers serve themselves. You would think pouring soda into a cup or turning a lever to fill a slurpee cup would be easy. Apparently for some customers it’s very difficult. The slurpee, when overworked, needs time to recharge and has a light indicating it. It’s a big flashing red light that says, “DO NOT USE IDIOT!!!” But do they see it? Of course not, so the slurpee isn’t quite as “slurpeey” as usual and they leave the half-filled cup there without saying a word. The station is always a mess even though we have trash dispensers all over that area. I haven’t even mentioned the hostile customers like gang members, beer runners, and robbers but that goes without saying. Those are some of the reasons why I hated working there. But since I’ve been back, it’s been great to see my sister and an opportunity to meet some of the new workers at the store my mom helped build.

For Part II Click Here.

John's Lament

2011-03-31T17:57:00.000-07:00

My buddy John Rinehart, whom I co-lead a Grace Group with, wrote a contemporary lament for today. It was read in last Sunday's worship service at our church. I wrote a lament when the Lakers lost in the 2008 Finals to the Celtics but I think John's lament over the state of our soul is slightly more elegant. I felt that it would be good to post it here and share it with all of you. So I share with you John's Lament:

Oh Lord, have mercy on us,
Not according to our righteousness, but your steadfast love
For we have sinned,
And all our evil ways are before you.

We are a people who love violence:
We entertain ourselves like men of old,
We’re amused by fighters, who act more like animals than like men.
We too would have rushed to the Coliseum in Rome to support the bloodshed,
Praising the strong for their victories and dismissing the weak without a second thought.
We don’t hate violence, in fact, in doesn’t even faze us anymore.
We watch movies filled with murder and bloodshed,
Our men think manhood is physical strength or sexual conquest, not holiness.
We find more men in the gym working on their bodies,
Than in church working on their souls,
Or in their homes working on their families.

Your wrath, O Lord is due on us, for we reject you at every turn.
You hate divorce and yet our hearts are so hard that over half of marriages end this way.
We treat it as normal and have whole professions and industries that accommodate it,
Some of us even get divorced again and again.
We twist your word when we don’t like it, excusing our sin and disregarding your truth.

“Not even a hint of sexual immorality” your Word says,
And yet it seems that there is not even a hint of sexual purity left.
It seems that everything that can be done, will be done,
And we are lost and blind without you.
Our promiscuity and sensuality is hatred toward our neighbors, not love.

We use and manipulate others for our gain, rather than serve and protect others for their pleasure.
We do not guard our hearts, but instead turn our ways to the right and the left,
Straying from your path,
Wandering from your way,
Going our own way,
Never giving thought to our end,
Never thinking that we’re sheep headed for the slaughter.
We distort your image, thinking it impossible that you might be a God of wrath,
Denying that we deserve judgment and that you, Lord, are sure to bring it.

O Lord, how we need repentance, reformation and revival.
Your people are dragged away by the currents of this world,
And the further we stray, the less we can hear or even remember your voice,
For you once called to us,
You once spoke to us,
You once convicted us,
And now our silence is full of noise, not full of your voice.

O Lord, your people flee from the cities of influence,
We run to the suburbs where land and homes entice us,
We want freedom and space, not truth and grace.
Your mission becomes our occasional hobby,
Instead of a lamp to our feet and a light to our path,
The light of your word is like a candle almost gone out.
We run after other counselors, not you, the Wonderful Counselor,
We take the advice of magazine editors, newspaper columnists and TV personalities,
While your Word collects dust.

We read little and think even less.
We avoid your calling and delegate ministry to professionals,
As if the priesthood of all believers was a bad theological idea.
We, like the Israelites, would ask you for a King of a Pastor who is omni-competent,
Or at least funny and mildly passionate about something.
We ignore our omnipotent King of Kings,
Not because we couldn’t correctly identify this title for Jesus on a Bible exam,
But because we fail to submit to you as you demand.
We resist the truth that you are King and we are not.
We lie in saying that we are Christians, when we won’t let Christ be King,
We won’t bend the knee to anyone, and so this ugly pride is everyone,
Which leads to our abundance of anger, complaining and strife.
We are a broken people wandering around in the dark,
Like sheep without a shepherd,
Made in the image of God,
And yet so repetitively scratching the itch in our souls with anything but truth,
The splinter cannot be removed without our Master Surgeon,
But instead we think our idols can heal,
Only to be left by them more wounded.

O God, have mercy on us, according to your steadfast love,
For the sake of your name, forgive our transgressions,

Forgive us for playing at our worship, worshipping our work, and working at our play,
We don’t keep your Sabbath,
We treat it like it was a good idea for people who didn’t have the internet,
But for us, we need to keep going.
We don’t trust you.
We don’t believe you.
We don’t know you.
We think your yoke is heavy, not light,
To follow you is a list of rules to keep, not a new life to lead.
The promise of your Holy Spirit was also for days gone by,
Not for our strength in the fight,
Nor for water when we’ve run dry.

We love to drink,
And are impressed to think,
Of what we carry in our hands
With no concern for the drunkenness of our land.
We love mirrors,
Because in them we see our gods,
The love of self,
Self-image and Self-help
Not self-discipline or self-control,
Self-esteem, not Christ esteem,
On whom do we lean?

For the one who walked the dusty streets,
And saw what had become of what was made,
Was not received, but instead was beat,
For speaking the truth and calling out spades.
So Lord, come quickly and save us from,
Your judgment and wrath which are to come.

Lord, without you we will be,
Punished for all eternity,
So please have mercy on our offense,
And lead our land to repentance.

Iron Sharpens Iron – Review

2011-03-21T19:43:00.000-07:00

I started teaching public school before I received my teaching credential. When my district told me to go back and get my credential so they could rehire me, I complied and enrolled at National University. Most of the classes were/are completely useless but there were a couple of classes in which I said, “This would’ve been useful a couple of years ago.” After getting thrown into the fire of teaching, you learn as you go. Most young teachers I’ve met said they actually learned the useful things while on the job.

To some degree, that’s how I felt reading Iron Sharpens Iron: Leading Bible-Oriented Small Groups that Thrive by Orlando Saer. In no way is the book useless like my credential classes at National, but after co-leading a small group for a couple of years I had the same, “This would’ve been useful a couple of years ago.” But for those of you who never have lead a small group Bible study, this book will be extremely useful to you. I’ll just point out some key points that I found helpful.

Why have a small group?

At Grace EV Free La Mirada, we encourage our members to join a “Grace Group” (small home Bible study). The reasons are (also stated in Saer’s book):

• We are built for community and smaller groups help nurture and foster that community.
• Accountability: We all play a role in each other’s sanctification.
• Small groups give an opportunity to care for one another (i.e., prayer, accountability, personal needs, etc.).
• A good place from which to reach the lost: members can work together to advance the gospel.

Being a leader of a small group Bible study is big responsibility far beyond simply leading a discussion of Sunday morning’s sermon. It takes work to avoid the group becoming stagnant. There was a time in our small group when the group grew stagnant and sluggish. I couldn’t tell you what was the cause at the time because of my lack of experience leading a small group but in retrospect I can see several factors that could’ve caused it. Saer gives categories to these pitfalls and tells you how to avoid them.

Having good social events beyond your regular meeting time in order to cultivate friendship and community is a helpful part of maintaining a healthy group. This makes accountability and sanctification become more natural. Saer also gives ideas for group outings and fun events but he also warns of the group simply becoming a “social club.”

Managing the Group

There are issues to consider when starting a new group.

1. Focus: What kind of group will it be? - Is its primary purpose to help enquirers, to train believers, or to study the Bible together and support each other?

2. Life Expectancy: Is it open-ended or fixed-life? – To stop groups getting stodgy, many small group ministries build in a ‘shelf life’ of maybe 1 or 2 years, after which groups are mixed up.

3. Study Programme: Who is responsible for setting it? - Usually the church leaders set this up but it’s important to keep a balance of “sticking with the program” and meeting the needs of the group.

4. Personnel: Who is involved in organizing the group? Who is the leader or co-leaders and what are their roles? Clear roles are important in that the members of the group clearly need to know who to look to for leadership.

5. Time and Place: Where and when do we meet? I prefer any time when the Lakers are not on but that hasn't worked out well. Praise the Lord for DVR.

6. Size: How big should the group be? - This could depend on the size of the room/house you meet at. This could also depend on how well connected everyone is to each other. Are you meeting the needs of your current members? If not, then add more people might not be a good idea for the time being. But if you guys are rock solid, then meeting another person's needs might just be what your group needs to continue to grow.

7. Make-up: How diverse is the group going to be? Do you want a good mix to avoid it simply being another sub-group (e.g., college group)? I say yes. It's important to be diverse not simply for diversity sake but to truly represent the body of Christ well.

These are all valid questions that Saer has pointed out. Wrestling through much of these issues myself has actually been enriching instead of burdensome. I can confidently say that co-leading a small group with my friends John Rinehart and Mark Joseph has been one of the must enriching experiences in my Christian life. I didn’t really want the responsibility of co-leading anything because of the work involved. What I didn’t anticipate was the transformation it would cause in my life. I find myself more caring towards the members of the group, and I have a deep seeded desire to see the group continue to grow as it has been through these couple of years.

In short, Saer has some great points. Remember to always keep God at the center of everything and that this time is to honor and glorify Him. Saer goes on and gives several practical steps in leading a discussion, preparing for leadership, and managing a group but the overall theme of the purpose of small groups is what I wanted to point out here. No doubt the Lord has used Grace Groups at our church to help people connect better with other members of the church. They act as the “frontlines” of ministry. When there is a crisis regarding a member of the church the first question asked is, “Is this person in a Grace Group?” If so, then it is followed by a second question, “Who are the leaders?” It’s been an amazing an honor to serve others in this capacity.

Champs and Chumps

2011-03-15T18:29:00.000-07:00

Gery Woelfel of the Journal Times tells the story of Kim Hughes, former Clippers assistant and interim head coach who was diagnosed with prostate cancer while he worked for the Clippers.

Hughes' new doctor, Stuart Holden, at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles, was receptive to doing the surgery the following week.

But then Hughes encountered yet another major obstacle.

"I contacted the Clippers about medical coverage and they said the surgery wouldn't be covered," Hughes said. "I said, ‘Are you kidding me?' And they said if they did it for one person, they'd have to do for everybody else."

When Dunleavy learned the Clippers wouldn't cover the cost of Hughes' surgery, he mentioned it to his players.

Several of them, including now Milwaukee Bucks forward Corey Maggette, Chris Kaman, Elton Brand and Marko Jaric, were taken aback by the news and decided to offer their assistance.

"Kim was one of our coaches and he's a really good friend of mine, too," Maggette said. "He was in a situation where the Clippers' medical coverage wouldn't cover his surgery. I thought it was a great opportunity to help someone in need, to do something that Christ would do.

"It shows your humanity, that you care for other people and not just yourself. Kim was in a life-and-death situation."

It was indeed a dicey time for Hughes. After a biopsy was taken, he learned his prostate cancer was much worse than he believed.

The cancer had quickly spread and was on the brink of moving to other areas of his body.

There are a lot of different reactions one might have to that.

One of the most obvious is to add yet another well deserved log to the bonfire of owner Donald Sterling's reputation.

Henry Abbott posted this story on ESPN.com early today. But I wanted to point out two things here. First, it was noble for the players to step up and help their assistant coach when they had the means to do so. And secondly, the contrast between how the Clipper organization handled this situation and how the Lakers handled the Ronny Turiaf situation back in 2005.

Recently, Ronny Turiaf shared his experience when asked about Wes Leonard, the basketball player from Fennville (Mich.) High School who died last week.

On July 16, 2005, with no prior symptoms or related family medical history, Turiaf was diagnosed with an enlarged aortic root. The discovery came during a routine checkup while he was playing on the Los Angeles Lakers' summer league team. Alongside Lakers GM Mitch Kupchak and assistant GM Ronnie Lester, Turiaf met with doctors, who gave him two options.
"They said, 'Ronny, you are lucky to be here today; you could have died at any point,'" Turiaf recalled. "[They said,] 'We have two choices for you: Choice A, either you stop playing basketball and can't do any contact sports, and you have to take medicine for the rest of your life. Or you have the surgery done.'

Turiaf choose to go with the surgery. Even though the Lakers voided his newly signed contract for health issues, they paid for the heart surgery and the treatment to get him back on the court. If you follow the Lakers for any amount of time you know that Turiaf returned to the court and was able to play basketball again. He played well enough that in the summer of 2008, the Golden State Warriors signed him to a four-year, $17 million contract.

Is it a wonder why one organization is Champs and the other Chumps? The Clippers are not cursed, they just have a cheap owner who lacks compassion. I hope Blake Griffin remembers this when he’s a free agent in the summer of 2014.

Tsunami, Sovereignty, and Mercy

2011-03-13T22:10:00.000-07:00

In light of the tragedy in Japan, I thought it would be good to reflect the Sovereignty and Mercy of the Lord. John Piper wrote an article titled: Tsunami, Sovereignty, and Mercy back in December 29, 2004 touching on the topic of natural disasters.

“The waves of death encompassed me, the torrents of destruction assailed me. . . This God—his way is perfect” (2 Samuel 22:5, 31).

After the loss of his ten children owing to a “natural disaster” (Job 1:19), Job said, “The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord” (Job 1:21). At the end of the book, the inspired writer confirms Job’s understanding of what happened. He says Job’s brothers and sisters “comforted him for all the evil that the Lord had brought upon him” (Job 42:11). This has several crucial implications for us as we think about the calamity in the Indian Ocean.

1) Satan is not ultimate, God is.

Satan had a hand in Job’s misery, but not the decisive hand. God gave Satan permission to afflict Job (Job 1:12; 2:10). But Job and the writer of this book treat God as the ultimate and decisive cause. When Satan afflicts Job with sores, Job says to his wife, “Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil?” (Job 2:10), and the writer calls these satanic sores “the evil that the Lord had brought upon him” (Job 42:11). So Satan is real. Satan brings misery. But Satan is not ultimate or decisive. He is on a leash. He goes no farther than God decisively permits.

Click here for the entire article: Tsunami, Sovereignty, and Mercy

My wife's thoughts on Exodus 3-4

2011-02-22T17:27:00.000-08:00

My wife recently shared her thoughts on Exodus 3 and 4 (through the bible reading plan) with our Grace Group (home bible study) and they were encouraged by her insight into the text of Scripture. So I'll post her thoughts here and hope you are equally as encouraged:

I have read through Exodus 3 and 4 many times in my life. In all honesty, I think that I usually approached the passage with a bit of self-righteous marvel at the fact that Moses would have the audacity to question God’s wisdom in choosing him to confront Pharaoh and lead the people out of Egypt. After all, didn’t Moses just witness God calling to him from a bush that was not consumed despite the fact that it was burning? How could he deny or doubt the power of God? As I read this same passage most recently, however, I saw more of myself in Moses than I have ever seen before as he offered up to God four different expressions of doubt about the wisdom of God choosing him for such a task.

The first expression comes in chapter 3, verse 10 as Moses asks God, “Who am I, that I should go to Pharaoh, and that I should bring the sons of Israel out of Egypt?” Moses is reluctant to do that which God has clearly called him to do because of doubts about his own qualifications or abilities. The second expression comes in verse 13 as Moses worries over what to say when the people of Israel ask who the God is who has sent him. The third expression is found in chapter 4, verse 1, when Moses questions God as to what he should say if the people do not believe the message God has given him. Lastly, in verse 10, Moses points out to God that he is “slow of speech and tongue” and has never “been eloquent,” essentially reiterating his first point about questioning God’s judgment in choosing him.

As I read this passage, I was confronted with the reality that as a believer, God has given to me a similar commandment to proclaim the Gospel in both word and deed. There is a world in bondage that needs to be delivered, and I am one of his chosen means for making that happen. I realized, though, that I have a tendency to defer to these same types of doubts and excuses when I feel apprehensive, reluctant, or even rebellious in doing what God has called me to do. Sometimes, like Moses, I wonder at God’s wisdom in choosing me and feel inadequate for the task at hand, especially when I feel called to share with someone who seems so far from ever believing. Sometimes I struggle over what to say about God and how to present him and the message of salvation to a people that have never heard or are hostile to the Gospel. I often fear that my efforts will be in vain. Like Moses, I sometimes feel “slow in speech and tongue” and have a tendency to
think of great things to say minutes or even hours later after the conversation is over. All of these excuses have lead to me pass up on opportunities that God has clearly given to me in the past. Needless to say, this realization has been rather convicting for me.

The encouraging part of the passage, though, is that God listens to Moses and has a response for each of his doubts. When Moses questions God’s wisdom in choosing him, God’s response is “I will be with you” (3:12) essentially reminding Moses that it not about Moses at all but rather about God proving his faithfulness through the impending deliverance for his people! When Moses asks God what name he should give to the people when they ask who sent him, God tells Moses to tell the Israelites that “I Am” has sent him. This name essentially serves as a reminder that God is the essence of all things, is complete in his character and his being, and is demonstrating his faithfulness to his people through their deliverance. When Moses expresses his doubt that the people will believe him, God offers to Moses several signs that will serve as proof of the message, the last of which is mentioned in 4:9- water from the Nile will turn into blood.
Thus, with each doubt that Moses expressed, God patiently offered a response that addressed Moses’ insecurities and excuses (and yet did not let him off the hook for the task at hand).

The responses that God gave to Moses in this passage can also serve as a comfort to people like me who sometimes struggle with feelings of inadequacy when it comes to sharing the Gospel message. Like Moses, I need to realize that it’s not about me at all, but rather God working through me to call people to himself. Thus, I need not let the concerns that I have about how I will be accepted or perceived to stop me from speaking boldly. When I struggle with what to say and how to present God (which sometimes seems like an overwhelming task when you think about all that God is!), I should be reminded that God has simply called me to proclaim his character. He is a faithful, loving, just, merciful, gracious, and jealous God who is in the businesses of reconciling people to himself, and that’s what I should be telling others. And, just like Moses, God has provided a sign for me- this time however, the sign is that of the blood of Christ, shed on the
cross.

In looking for something to offer to people as “proof” of the message, I need to look no further than the cross and proclaim that message boldly and with confidence.

No, Mr. President: John Piper's Response to President Obama on Abortion

2011-02-15T17:19:00.000-08:00

My buddy Dom posted this YouTube clip of John Piper's response to President Obama's stance on abortion on his Facebook page. I reposted on my page thinking that it was a good exhortation for us Christians to think about. As I gave it some more thought, Piper's response struck a chord with me. What stood out to me was John Piper's anger. Now if you know anything about John Piper you know that he's passionate and being angry is nothing new. But what made it profound was that it was a display of godly anger.

The world thinks that anger is a negative emotion and in most cases, it is displayed in terrible, horrific, and ungodly ways. This made me think about things I get angry about, like my dogs not listening to me, losing pick-up basketball games, when the Lakers lose, when I'm stuck in terrific, or stuck in a class that I hate. You get the picture. But rarely do I display godly anger in these instances. It's probably because they're trivial things, things that really don't matter in the grand scheme of things.

This short YouTube clip is a rare occasion where anger is displayed in a God-glorifying manner. Killing unborn people created in the image of God should make us angry. I'm certainly not advocating blowing up abortion clinics but I am advocating standing up for what we believe in as Christians and not caring what the world may think of us, that is what true courage is.

From Blog to Blog

2011-01-25T18:55:00.000-08:00

I mentioned before that our church started a bible reading plan. Actually, my buddy John Rinehart wrote the reading bible. He also came up with the idea of start a community blog, which we contribute on thoughts on what God is saying to us through His word. This way, we would hope to inspire others to continue to read the Word of God whether they follow the Reading Plan or simply read the bible on their own.

After taking a look at the roster of the blog - I must say that I feel honored to be among such great people who think well and articulate their thoughts even better. I would hope that this would help me in my personal bible reading and I grow along with my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ.

For the few of you who follow this blog, I will continue to write about life and all the fun that it brings. For those of you who would like to follow our thoughts on the Word of God here is the link:
http://itsallgrace.wordpress.com/

I've been blessed already since the blog has launched and I hope that others will be also. I am truly blessed with an amazing Body of Christ. It's both humbling and inspiring to see the people I attend church with grow in Christ. For we all play a role in each other's sanctification.

11 And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers, 12 to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, 13 until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, 14 so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes. 15 Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, 16 from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.

Ephesians 4:11-16

2010 in Review

2011-01-24T16:13:00.000-08:00

I'm sitting in a useless education class and thought to myself, "Hey, it's a good time to reflect on the year that just pasted" (okay, it's not completely useless but it's close). Last year was a great year. It's a good idea to keep track of the simply progression of life. So here are some snap shots of 2010 gone by:

Sadly, I lost a friend, Emily Haager, to Cystic Fibrosis and the wonderful example of a Christ-centered life she lived was inspiring and I never want to forget that.

I also lost my grandma and my aunt within a week of each other. Both were Christians and the hope that God gives us through Jesus Christ is unquestioned when dealing with death. Death is not someone should ever get use to.

Unexpectedly, I gained another dog, which was against my will.

Expectedly, we did buy a house. Expectedly only because we were looking for an entire year. It's been wonderful to have your own place. And spending life with the best wife in the world has also been a blessing.

I also taught summer school, which turned out to be a life-changing moment.

And I can't go without mentioning my Lakers winning back-to-back championship!!! All in all, a great year.

Most importantly, I believe that I've mature as a person and as a Christian. There is certainly room for growth (and they'll always be this side of heaven) but the overall progress has been enjoyable even though it comes with it's pains but I believe that's how it's suppose to work.

Well, lets hope for another great year and a 3-peat.

2nd Anniversary

2011-01-17T09:19:00.000-08:00

What can I say about my marriage that I haven’t already said? I answered the question, “How’s the married life?” when I first got married. There was a time when I thought I would never get married and now I’ll be celebrating my 2nd year with my beautiful wife. Over those two years, I have noticed that my conversations with my friends have changed from abstract theology that involved questions like, “What do you think the Apostle Paul meant when he said ‘fill in the blank’” to “How’s your marriage?” and “How come our wives don’t think we’re funny?” It’s just a product of the ever-changing life-stage.

For example, the other day the wife and I were shopping for furniture at Living Spaces and I called my buddy Jared to ask for some suggestions because he just bought some furniture too. When I called him I told him, “Hey I’m at Living Spaces, how much did you get that rug for?” He replied, “You’re at Living Spaces? I’m at IKEA!” Both of us laughed because we’re apparently on the same life track.

I use to think practical conservations were boring. But the wife has put practicality into perspective. I still enjoy trying to understand the sovereignty of God to the best of my ability, but now, to truly see it lived out everyday of my life as I enter different life stages, I begin to see the fingerprints of God all over. I couldn’t have scripted my life the way it has turned out so far. One of those God-scripted aspects of my life is my marriage to the wife I absolutely needed.

My marriage genuinely feels like teamwork, partners simply “doing life together.” Her strengths complement my weaknesses and vice versa. Life would just be miserable without her on so many levels. Sure there are times when I wish I could “go it alone.” Like the time I was going through the drive through at In-N-Out Burgers. I was hoping to get to the speaker and place my order before she had a chance to ask me what I was going to order because I wanted a 3x3 (three beef patties in one burger) and knew she wouldn’t allow it. The line was long (like always) so she asked me what I was going to order. I kept it vague, “A burger.” She knows the trick so she starts asking for specifics, “Which burger?” The line clearly was not moving fast enough. I sadly confessed, “A 3x3 combo.” She replied, “That’s not on the menu. That’s NOT THREE BEFF PATTIES in one burger, is it?” You could probably guess what happened the rest of the way. She talked me out of getting one and I settled for a double-double combo and she barely gave me that.

However, if I were left to myself to determine my eating habits I would have a heart attack at age 35. Without the wife, I would probably have cable TV with NBA League Pass and watch basketball all night and every night because what else would I be doing? Instead, she helps me become a productive person and encourages me in her example of godliness and living a quiet and sound life. You won’t believe this but I don’t like being “quiet” and being sound feels down right boring. However, I’ve learned to enjoy the “quiet life,” but only because I enjoy it with the best and most beautiful wife in the world.

Another component about marriage is the wife fully understanding and loving the entirety of her man. What I mean when I say “entirety” is all of the personality quirks that come with the man. Even if a person is godly and attractive that doesn’t mean you’ll be able to enjoy them as a spouse. I know a few godly and attractive people who drive me up the wall. Of course I probably drive lots of other people up the wall, too, so lets move on. My point is that the wife loves every little aspect of me that may go unnoticed by most people or aspects that would normally drive others crazy. For instance, our church has doughnuts and coffee for people after 1st service. I enjoy the coconut doughnut, but this particular Sunday they either ran out or didn’t pick any up. I faithfully tithe to the church and I would appreciate if they picked up a couple more so that they don’t run short next time. Anyway, since they were out of the coconut doughnut I had the tough decision between the sprinkle or crumb doughnuts. I spent a while hovering over the doughnut box like I was doing neurosurgery, intently analyzing doughnuts and weighing the pros and cons of each selection. I finally went with the crumb doughnut.

Immediately after the selection process came to an end, I looked up and there she was looking at me and giggling. I asked, “Are you mocking me?” She kindly replied, “No, I just love how you put so much thought into picking a doughnut. I love every part of you” while affectionately kissing me on the cheek. “Well, it wouldn’t have been hard if they had the coconut.” I thought to myself.

Yes, she “loves every part of me” and shows me that everyday. I don’t think there’s another woman on this plant that would tolerate my non-sense. It is only by God’s grace that I have such a wonderful wife. I don’t deserve her but she makes me want to become the man who is worthy of such a precious gift.

Happy 2nd Anniversary, honey. I love you.

Dwight Howard interview by The Post Game

2011-01-13T15:15:00.001-08:00

Today thepostgame.com released an interview with Orlando Magic center Dwight Howard. When asked about his Christianity he didn't shy away from the topic but mentions Christ by name. I thought this was interesting and I pray that the Lord would continue to use him to influence lives in a God-pleasing manner (and that he would sign with the Lakers in the summer of 2012).

ThePostGame.com: When you were entering the NBA you said you wanted to be vocal about Christianity, but you haven’t been that vocal publically? Did you want to be more private and how do you feel now?

Howard: “It’s not hard. I’m a Christian and I’m always going to be one. I represent Christ wherever I go. I think the whole thing about being a Christian, I think people made it seem like I was trying to change the whole NBA by myself. But my job is not to change the NBA. It’s the people that watch the NBA, the fans around, the people that look up to basketball to be role models. We all make mistakes and that’s one thing I try to let kids know, teens know and everyone we come across. Hey, we make mistakes. Learn from the mistake and try to move on. Being a Christian, I know that everything I do is being magnified and put on a whole different level. It hasn’t stopped me one bit for living my life and I’m grateful for where I am as a person. I understand that I represent God. Everything I do is for him. I’m not ashamed for that. I’m a Christian and always a Christian. That’s never going to change. I’m not worried about what everybody says about it. I’m just going to remain the same person I am.”

To read the whole interview click here.

We Are All Witnesses

2011-01-08T13:53:00.000-08:00

No I’m not talking about Lebron James. I think there’s been plenty written about him already, don’t you? I’m talking about being a Christian. And being a Christian means “We are all witnesses” to Jesus’ life and ministry.

I’ve often heard it said that, as Christians, “We are not commended to witness but to be a witness.” Really? Didn’t Jesus command, “Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age” (Matt 28:19-20) and that making disciples involves witnessing (sharing the gospel) with people?

St. Francis of Assisi once said, “Preach the gospel. And if necessary use words.” I can appreciate the phrase and it’s emphasis on having Christian character. But if we end with simply having good character, then that’s not the whole gospel. Besides, St. Francis spent most of his time as the Dr. Dolittle of his age tending to his animals frequently.

It’s like our other champion slogan, “Christianity isn’t a religion but a relationship.” But didn’t Jesus do religious things like pray regularly and attend the synagogue weekly? I’m not saying Christianity is not a relationship with your Creator. It’s just both a relationship and a religion. In the same way that we are not simply to be witnesses but we are also to witness.

So we can emphasize the importance of personal character, which is a must, but we can also overemphasize it to the point that we never say anything about God in fear of not “being a good witness” because we feel we’re not perfect. This mentality is doomed for failure, much like “Country Strong" coming out this weekend. Jesus picked imperfect people to disciple and sent out imperfect people to make disciples. I think it’s okay if we’re not perfect.

For example, the other night I was playing basketball at the local gym like I have for several years now. I’ve been able to build pretty good relationships with non-believers throughout that time. It was my only access to non-believers during my Biola days.

Ray is one of the guys I have met at the gym. Ray is one of the best players I’ve played against. He’s a beast and one of the toughest guys to guard because of his strength and speed. We battle all the time and it’s fun. We text each other throughout the week making sure we’ll be at the gym. People there know I’m a Christian, and that I went to Biola University. No, my conduct on the basketball court may not show proper Christian character all the time but I’m working on it (it’s the Kobe-edge-cut-throat mentality). Interestingly, Ray “randomly” (I have randomly in quotes because it’s never random) broached the subject of God after we were finished playing one night. Everyone had left and we were just talking about life. He brought up the fact that he became a Christian as a teenager but still made mistakes along the way (join the club) but his church condemned him for the mistakes instead of encouraging him and pointing him in the right direction. He was a young man trying to find his way and willing to repent. The church he was attending, however, didn’t offer him much in the way of grace. He became bitter and eventually walked away from the Lord. Recently, however, he’s been having bad dreams, frightening dreams that have forced this rigid tough guy to his knees in prayer.

I told him that God is after his heart. He said, “I think demons are after me.” I replied, “God allows that sometimes for the greater good. In this case, the greater good is you coming back into the fold. You need to find a Bible-teaching church with good leadership. Forget about those bad experiences in the past. It’s time for a new beginning and God will give that to you in a moment if you’re willing to receive it.” As Ray stood for a second in silent contemplation, he nodded his head in agreement and said, “Yeah, I think I am.” I asked if I could pray for him on the spot. He said, “I would like that.” So a couple of guys who have battled throughout the years in countless basketball games in a public gym decided to pray. Yes, we are all witnesses.

The Tower & The Call

2011-01-07T07:15:00.000-08:00

In seminary, when studying a particular passage, you’re taught to look at the passage that comes before and/or after to help you with the context of the passage in question. As we start the year reading through the Bible, I ran across Genesis 11 and 12. I’ve read these chapters before several times but I’ve never really put them together. Maybe it’s the genealogy at the end of chapter 11 that throws me off but John Piper pointed out the connection.

As you recall Genesis 11 is talking about The Tower of Babel where man came up with the idea to build a tower to reach the heavens. (Only men would come up with this idea. This reminds me of the Lunar Rover. Who comes up with the idea and says, “Hey guys, lets spend billlllllllllions of dollars and build a spaceship to fly to the moon so we could drive around on a piece of rock.” But if there are really Transformers there, I’ll recant the previous statement.) The people in Genesis 11 were motivated by self-recognition. In verse 4, the men said, “Come, let us build ourselves a city, with a tower that reaches to the heavens, so that we may make a name for ourselves and not be scattered over the face of the whole earth” (NIV). The Lord of course doesn’t allow this to happen and He comes down and confuses their language so they don’t understand each other and end up scattered anyway.

The very next chapter (12) is The Call of Abram and the covenant promise that Abram will be a great nation. Most of the times when I have heard this passage preached, it has been isolated from chapter 11. Look at the contrast between the motivation of the men in Genesis 11, “Come, let us build ourselves a city, with a tower that reaches to the heavens, so that we may make a name for ourselves” (v. 4) and the promise of God in chapter 12:2-3:

“I will make you into a great nation, and I will bless you;  I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing. 3 I will bless those who bless you, and whoever curses you I will curse;  and all peoples on earth will be blessed through you.”

Notice the repetition of the “I will(s)” from the Lord. It’s not by accident that this promise was made immediately following The Tower of Babel account where man wanted to “make a name for themselves.” The Lord was making it clear to Abram that he would be great but only by His grace and sovereign power so that the Lord alone will receive the credit.

What is Abram’s role in all of this? The Lord commanded Abram in 12:1, “The Lord had said to Abram, “Leave your country, your people and your father’s household and go to the land I will show you” (NIV). Abram’s role was obedience. The Lord said, “leave” so Abram left. That’s pretty simple and I like simple.

Lets recap:

Obedience = Blessing, direction, and greatness/purpose

Seeking one’s own glory = confusion, scattered (no direction), stopped building the tower/city (shame/purposeless)

I think I’ll take door number one.

New Year, Same Book

2011-01-06T22:46:00.000-08:00

It’s the start of a new year symbolizing the start to a new beginning. My church a few years ago started a Bible reading program that would get you to read 55% of the Bible in a year. Guess what? We’re doing it again. My buddy John Rinehart actually wrote out the program for the year so I feel somewhat obligated to follow it.

My initial thought was, “I’ve read the entire Bible several times on my own, why do I need a program to do it this time?” Furthermore, I tend to be a reflective guy and don’t simply want to burn through books of the Bible to meet a deadline. I would rather take a year in one book in the Bible and have it impact me the way Romans impacted Martin Luther, who started the Reformation, instead of reading the entire Bible and have it impact me like Dan Brown, who wrote The Da Vinci Code.

In addition to the church program, my buddy Dom started a facebook page called, “The Bible In A Year.” The page is about . . . wait for it . . . reading the Bible in a year! Dom’s been posting his thoughts on the passages he’s been reading and inviting others to share in the process. My thought was, “I’ve been journaling for years now as a Christian but I’ve never asked to read anyone else’s journal, so why would anyone else care about what I think?”

Now here’s my counter argument to myself (and yes, I’m arguing with myself). It’s been a while since I’ve read the Bible straight through, and it’s about time I do it again. Furthermore, what better time to do it than at the beginning of the year along with your church? As Christians, we are called to be a body, a community for each other where we value one another lives and opinions. Each of us play a critical role for each other to be able to function properly the way God intended, namely, a family of believers.

So why not start a facebook page to help each other read the Bible as a community and use society media for God’s glory? Every time you log on you’ll be reminded to open the Word of God if you haven’t already and if you have, do it again. I’ll attempt to write my thoughts throughout the year in particular passages that I find personally edifying to my soul. I have no doubt I will also find the thoughts of other fellow believers to be edifying as well. Count me in on the reading program and committing to it for the entire year (I have a feeling I might have to pull a couple of all-nighters like back in college). So I’m boarding The Voyage of the Dawn Jammer (the name Dawn Jammer still cracks me up) to start the journey through the Bible and see what the Lord does and where we end up. Hey, I’m actually feeling pretty excited about this! Crazy.

Holiday Cheer 2010

2011-01-03T22:12:00.000-08:00

I know that I’m late with this blog but since I was early last year, I’ll go ahead and cut myself some slack. In 2008, I was treated to my first full-Christmas experience. As the tradition continues this is how things played out this year.

As usual, Christmas morning starts off with some breakfast with the family (at the in-laws). As half of us walk around half asleep and not saying much to anyone (think me and Jon) we patiently await the arrival of other family members doing other things. We were blessed to have Farakh and Rebecca Zaman join us this year. Rebecca is the sister of Rachel Davis – the wife of Alan Davis – a brother of the wife – did you get all that? Furthermore, Alan and Rachel were able to stay the week along with Eric and Liz – Liz is the cousin of Allie Davis – the wife of PJ Davis – a brother of Eric Davis – who are the brothers of the wife – did you get all that? Good. I’m glad we’re all tracking. Allie was also able to make it (all the way from Guam, no less). PJ was helplessly stuck with the kids ordering pizza every night. Do they have pizza in Guam? Apparently. PJ felt left out but no one cared.

Before I start too far in with Christmas morning, however, let me begin with Christmas Eve. Rachel has been a great addition to the family, almost as great as me. And with additions to the family there are also additions of traditions. Rachel came up with the idea of making gingerbread houses the night before Christmas. Great call. We all gathered around the dining room table and started our craft. It was surprisingly pretty fun. The wife and I tagged-teamed and built Staples Center (of course). Becky built a World War II foxhole, clearly symbolizing her feistiness. Alan built a hut straight out of Gilligan’s Island to match his “no worries” attitude. Rachel built the White House, interestingly with red doors. Clearly, Rachel likes being the boss. Jon built a romantic scene, a bench overlooking a river flowing under a lovely pathway. I think he’s lonely. Farakh and Rebecca tag-teamed and built a house with a smoking chimney (using dry ice) and Christmas lights – overachievers. Rachel declared herself the winner but that’s up for debate. Good times all around (except for PJ who was upset that we started this tradition the year he left). I have no doubts that next year it’ll be even bigger.

Shortly after the gingerbread bash we went quietly back to our place. The wife had half my Christmas gift for me ready to be opened at home. Without much thought, I went ahead and opened it. It was a beautiful framed picture of my mom with the eulogy I wrote as well. I wept. It’s been about three years since my mom’s passing and it’s still difficult to see pictures of her. It reminds me how beautiful she was and that I no longer have her around. It’s especially difficult during the holidays. We’ll put the picture in the family room for all to see, so that everyone could remember what an amazing woman she was.

The other half of the wife’s gift was some clothes and a lot of socks. She knows that I won’t buy clothes for myself so she takes any opportunity to buy me some new stuff. She also notices that I have holes in just about every pair of socks I currently have except my dress socks. I tell her the trick is to know how to hide the holes. She wasn’t having it, so she bought me some new socks and will be throwing away my perfectly good “holy” socks.

As for the wife’s gift, I got her furniture. I can hear some people now telling me how lame that is because “we both use the furniture so it can’t really be a gift,” just like the way people point out that “you can’t say you bought your wife a house because you live in it too.” Since when does something qualify as a “gift” if only one person uses it? Besides, I bought myself a reclining chair for reading, napping, and doing nothing. I bought her a counter table, four counter stools, a dresser for the bedroom, and a coffee table none of which I’ll be using. So there, take THAT!

Moreover, I’ve never been furniture shopping so you could imagine my surprise with the prices. I walked into Living Spaces and nearly had a heart attack. I thought it was some terrible joke. Immediately, I asked a salesmen “What are those sofas made out of? Cocaine?” I won’t tell you how much I spent because I don’t want to relive the nightmare but lets just say that it was more than socks. Lets move on.

On Christmas morning we begin with the usual Davis tradition of the youngest to the oldest person opening up the gifts. It’s truly a delight to give to others and watching the joy that thoughtful gifts bring to the ones you love. I’ve already mentioned how my perspective of the Holiday Season has changed throughout the years and it’s still continuing to transform, thanks to a great family and an Awesome God. We even got the in-laws additional gifts this year. For the mother-in-law (aka the mother-in-law) we got her some Noel Piper books (John Piper’s wife) and for the father-in-law (aka The Chief) we got him audio sermons by John Piper (aka Johnny Master P) on the entire book of Hebrews and Romans. I fully intend on borrowing them immediately. It was a great Christmas all around. Well, it was almost perfect – my Lakers for the second straight year rolled over to a Lebron James led team. I guess you can’t have everything, but at least I got some new socks.

Devotional-122210 Thoughts on Psalm 3

2010-12-22T15:14:00.000-08:00

A Psalm of David: When he fled from his son Absalom.

1 LORD, how many are my foes! How many rise up against me!  
2 Many are saying of me, “God will not deliver him.”
3 But you, LORD, are a shield around me, my glory, the One who lifts my head high.  
4 I call out to the LORD, and he answers me from his holy mountain.
5 I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the LORD sustains me.  6 I will not fear though tens of thousands assail me on every side.
7 Arise, LORD! Deliver me, my God!  Strike all my enemies on the jaw; break the teeth of the wicked.
8 From the LORD comes deliverance. May your blessing be on your people.

I read this passage this morning and thought to myself, “I really don’t have ‘thousands of people assailing me,’” at least none to my knowledge. I could imagine David’s heartbreak when he was crying out to the Lord for deliverance from his enemies with the additional pain of his son Absalom trying to kill him. I can’t relate to this specific situation (although I believe my son, when I have him, will eventually kill me) so I tried contextualizing the passage for myself.

Now we don’t have many “foes” today unless you’re a gang-member, in which case you have bigger problems. But I like to look at different circumstances and situations that cause me to be distracted from truly trusting in the Lord completely. I stress out about having a mortgage now. What’s the big deal? The Lord has faithfully provided for me my entire life. Is He really going to stop now? I stress out about eventually becoming a father and thinking about how badly I’m going to mess up my kids. What’s the big deal? My buddy Bryan has a 4th child coming and he's doing alright. I’m afraid my Lakers won’t 3-peat because up to this point of the season they stink. What’s the big deal? They do this every year only to turn it on in the playoffs. And what are the chances of Phil Jackson NOT 3-peating? I think you get the point.

These things are “foes” in my mind. Foes that battle my faith in the Lord. But as David said, “Strike all my enemies on the jaw” (v. 7). I love that part! It’s not only “Lord deliver me from my enemies and also kick their @$$.” I’m not saying that David was in the right frame of mind when he said this nor am I condoning "striking people on the jaw" but the main point is clear. Namely, “from the Lord comes deliverance” and all the self-afflicting anxiety I give myself or the lies from the enemy whispered into my ear that I’m tempted to believe will be defeated by God’s overwhelming blessings and goodness.

God’s overwhelming blessings and goodness: In a time when it has become difficult for many people finically He’s given both my wife and I good jobs. I have the most beautiful and loving wife in the world, married into a crazy but yet amazing family, a great church, a growing Grace Group (home bible study), friends who are like brothers, Laker season tickets, semi-obedient dogs, a great little sister, and a wonderful home with a great master bathroom. Yes, I think it’s time to take those anxieties and “strike them on the jaw.”

"Better a God whose mystery we cannot understand (but who has given us grounds for trusting when we cannot understand) than one whose adequacy we cannot rely on, or whose interest we cannot be sure of."
- John Goldingay

House Sweet House

2010-12-17T07:10:00.000-08:00

It has been said, “Home is where the heart is.” That may be true but your heart can’t shield you from the elements, gang members, wild dogs, ninjas, midgets, and sharks. So even though a “home” is an abstract idea beyond physical components you still need a house (or a place of shelter) in order to live. I wish this were not the case because houses are expensive (especially in Southern California, you know, the place I am living in).

After meticulously saving like crazy and my mother leaving me a small portion of her estate, the wife and I recently purchased a house (in Southern California, no less). It was exciting when we initially started looking for a house. Over time, it became less and less exciting. Actually, it became so frustrating for me that I was ready to build my own house. But if you want a house you need to go through the process. There’s no way around it. Unless you’re rich and price is a non-issue, it’s going to be a difficult process trying to find a place both you and your spouse like and find a place within the price range you’re comfortable with. I’ll give you a wild guess on who was on the lower end of the price range.

The Kitchen:

The wife wanted a kitchen with lots of counter and cupboard space. What do I care about the kitchen? I only go in there to get something to drink or rummage through the cupboard looking for a snack and frustratingly failing in that attempt. The wife told me that she cooks all the dinners, which I happily eat, in the kitchen. So if I want to continue eating those dinners I better get a house with a nice kitchen. Fair enough.

The Yard:

The wife also wanted a yard because of the dogs (that’s right, dogssssssssssss). I can’t believe that we are shopping for a house and keeping the dogs in mind. Dogs? Dogs! Dogs. Not in a hundred years I would’ve thought this. Samson (Boxer) keeps digging up the backyard. I tell him that there's nothing back there but apparently he doesn't believe me.

The Man Cave:

The only thing that was important to me, regarding the house, was that I would have a Man Cave. You know, a place where I could put my Kobe autographed shoes. The MC would be a place of studying God’s word, prayer, mediation, and the watching of Laker games.

The Old Neighborhood:

Now I’m extremely thankful for the father-in-law (aka The Racquetball Brawler) for renting out his old house to us. However, the neighborhood where we lived was awful. First, the street was as thin as Nicole Richie. I think it was built in 1809. You’d be lucky if two Priuses could drive by each other on that street. Secondly, the city of Whittier does not allow dogs in their parks. Really?! I don’t like cities that hate on dogs. It’s okay if I do but an entire city? Also, there are so many trees that are destroying the foundation of streets and homes that it’s down right hazardous to simply walk down the street. Don’t get me wrong. I’m all for aesthetics but not at the expense of safety and functionality.

Finally, our next-door neighbor was a drugged-out-pot-smoking-inconsiderate-inheritance-blowing-burn-out who did strange things. For example, he would leave his diesel truck idling for 20 minutes in the driveway. It would drive the dog and me nuts. He would mow the lawn at 2am, listen to rock music from his truck at full-blast at 11pm, and refused to trim his trees even though they were destroying the foundation of The Racquetball Brawler’s driveway. Yes, he’s a real winner. Interestingly, the drugged-out-pot-smoking-inconsiderate-inheritance-blowing-burn-out who did strange things got evicted right when we were moving. Great timing.

Furthermore, the apartments down the street had “shady” written all over them. There were cops parked on the street just observing the place because they knew something was going on (e.g., drug activity, gangs, etc.). Every now and then, the apartments (aka Shady A-part) would blast ganger-rap, which dropped F-bombs left and right. I don’t want my dogs picking up that kind of language. I think you get the point. We’re happy to be moving.

The New Neighborhood:

It’s only been a few weeks but the new neighborhood seems really nice. The wife likes it and that’s always a plus. Every house on the block is well kept and the people seem nice. No ganger-rap at full-blast dropping F-bombs, yet. Also, every house seems to have dogs. So I’m guessing the neighbor, in general, likes dogs. The other day I was walking the dogs and I heard a gentlemen yelling at his dogs because they were being disobedient. It looks like I’ll be getting along with the people around here since we seem to have the same bitter/sweet relationship with our dogs.

Upgrades:

I take that back, The Man Cave is not the ONLY thing important to me. I wanted a house that was already fully upgraded (e.g., new kitchen, new bathroom, new man cave, etc.). This was important for no other reason than that I didn’t want to put in the work to upgrade that stuff myself. The good news with this house is that both the wife and I liked the upgrades. Sweet! I’m always excited about less work. The father-in-law is completely different. He would rather buy a fixer-upper and upgrade everything himself. I don’t even like painting. Hey, speaking of painting . . .

After we bought the house the wife immediately wanted to paint. I thought the house was fine the way it was (because I don’t like to work or paint). Interestingly, all the women I told said, “Of course you have to paint.” And all the dudes said “Sorry man, painting sucks.” Yes it does.

Unless the color is bright pink or vomit green, I really don’t care what color it is. But the reason why women need to paint is because you buy them a house but they need to make it a home. Actually, I’m convinced that even if a woman likes the original colors of a house she would buy the same colors and paint over it anyway just to say that she was the one that picked out the colors.

On a more serious note, I see this house as a huge blessing from the Lord. It’s a life stage that felt so far away for me and now it’s here. I recently attended a Men’s Breakfast at my church and sat at table where we talked about mortgage rates. Mortgage rates?! Baffling. I turned to my buddy Chris Hunt and said, “When we were going through grad school did you ever think we would be talking about mortgage rates?” He simply replied, “No.”

It all feels like growing up. Although you don’t need a house for maturation, it’s still a surreal feeling because I realize how much of an idiot I am. Here’s a story to illustrate my point: My mom had some exotic birds as pets when I was in high school. She had to leave for about a month on a business trip in Thailand and left me responsible or feeding the birds. You know where this is going. Simply put, the birds didn’t make it by the time my mom got back from her trip.

Despite all that, the Lord has entrusted me with a beautiful wife and now a lovely home (I’m not counting the dogs). I’m not sure why He would bless me in such a generous fashion. If He’s anything like me, it’s probably because He thinks it would be funny. Outside of that, there are only two reasons I could think of. First, God is good. It’s that simple. Second, with these wonderful blessings in my life, there is a sense of responsibility to be a good husband and a responsible homeowner to His glory.

We hope to use the house to bless others and glorify God in the process, starting with get-togethers for Laker games. After that I’m all out of ideas but I’m sure the wife will think of some good things.

Good Riddance Indeed

2010-12-15T19:53:00.000-08:00

It’s official. The Sasha Vujacic Era is over. As most of you know, I’m a Laker fan and have been ever since I realized that every fatherless boy needs heroes. Despite being a hardcore Laker fan, I can tell you with every fiber in my being that I hated Sasha Vujacic. Hated. I don’t like to throw the word “hate” around very often because I believe it to be a strong word, which shouldn’t be used loosely. Here is my running list of things I hate (in no particular order):

Traffic
Slow internet
Busy work (i.e., education classes, any reason to go to the DMV, etc.)
Every form of evil
Sasha Vujacic

You could see that the list isn’t very long. I don’t even have any ex-girlfriends on the list. For right now lets focus on the Sasha Era. The 27th pick in the 2004 draft from Yugoslavia came into the league with potential. He didn’t play much his rookie year but worked his way into the rotation his 2nd year, being a scrappy defender and decent long-range shooter.

As time passed, Sasha never seemed like he was learning the game of basketball or displayed any type of common sense. He would D-up his player 90 feet from the basket as though he was trying out for Compton Dominguez High School never realizing, “Hey this is the NBA and every starting PG for every team could beat me easily 90 feet away from the basket so maybe I should back up.” If they kept a stat of fouls 90 feet from the basket, I know that Sasha would be the all-time leader in a landslide. Moreover, when Sasha would complain about foul calls he looked exactly like a third-grade girl who was just given a Time-Out (This year’s soccer-girl hair do didn’t help shake that image). It’s as if he never learned the rules of basketball.

I remember taking my buddy Tyson to a Lakers vs. Kings game when M. Bibby was still playing for the Kings. It was a tight game until the 4th quarter when they put Sasha in to guard Bibby. Bibby is a vet who knows all the tricks. Sasha played defense 90 feet from the basket and you wouldn’t believe what happened next . . . wait for it . . . he fouled Bibby. That’s not even the worst part, he kept fouling Bibby in the backcourt, got us in the penalty, and Bibby nailed the game shut with free throws. Everybody in the crowd was in disbelief that a professional basketball player kept making the same mistake over and over and over again never realizing that maybe, just maybe, he should try something different. I could tell you countless stories like this but I think you get the picture. Here's a great article by Kevin Ding from OC Register.

In 2008 (Sasha’s contract year) he played had his best season: Games played 72, FG% 45, 3P% 43, FT% 83, PPG 9 while playing about 18 mpg. Not bad. During the summer, while negotiating a new contract, Sasha complained about not getting enough money and years and even threatened to play in Europe if he didn’t get the contract he wanted. Remember that this was the summer after Sasha gave Ray Allen a lay-up in Game 4 of the Finals that killed our chances of winning the title that year. When asked during the post-game why he didn’t foul, he replied, “I was scared.” After the Lakers gave him 3yrs for about $15M, his game just went into the toilet (I wish someone gave me $15M to be scared to do my job). I can't stand players who after they get a contract their game goes into the toilet.

Here are his numbers the following two years:

2008-2009: Games played 80, FG% 38, 3P% 36, FT% 92, PPG 6 while playing about the same amount of minutes in 2008 (He didn’t score a point in the 2009 Finals).

2009-2010: Games played 67, FG% 40, 3P% 30, FT% 84, PPG 3 while playing 8mpg.

Yes, I will say that Sasha hit the biggest free throws in Laker history in Game 7 of the 2010 Finals. But considering that he complained loudly about his contract, lost count of how many games he cost us, and had an un-teachable attitude, that’s the least he could’ve done.

I’m currently starting a poll at work with how long it takes for Maria Sharapova to call off the engagement. The current over/under is three months. Once the trade was reported I got some text messages and Facebook postings saying, “Good riddance” and “Finally, we got rid of him.” These were from fellow Laker fans as well (The deal saves the Lakers about $9M).

I do have to admit, Sasha did make attending Laker games a lot more fun because I would always start a “We-hate-Sas-ha” chant with the boys in section 303. Every time he checked into the game we would boo him. But since he hardly played anymore I had to give all my boos during the pre-game warms up when Sasha would pop-up on the Jumbo-Tron. That’s the part of Sasha I’m going to miss the most. No matter who we were playing we always had a villain, even though it was in-house.

So let me be one of the millions of Laker fans who say, “So long” into oblivion. Pencil me in for the Jan 14 game vs. the Nets. I can’t miss an opportunity to boo Sasha one last time because he’ll be playing in Turkey next year (and no longer engaged to Maria Sharapova).

And I'll leave you with one of my favorite Sasha moments, which almost cost us game 6 of the 2010 Western Conference Finals:

Sickness Stinks!!!

2010-12-12T07:58:00.000-08:00

I used to pride myself for never getting sick. I haven’t taken a day off for sickness yet. However, this past week a sickness hit me like a freight train. I felt like there was a Pearl Jam concert inside, it was difficult to focus, and I spent most of the night coughing like Doc Holiday.

What made this worse was that my head was hurting so much I couldn’t even read. I couldn’t work out and I had to miss a basketball tournament this weekend. It’s difficult when I don’t have a productive day, even worse if I don’t have a productive week. Life is short and I don’t have time to get sick (or so I think). Sickness stinks! But it happens to all of us.

Here’s the thing, we’re not promised the next day. We’re not even promised good health. So when we feel like all our molecules are going to explode into oblivion we should be mindful that the days of health are a gift to us. What are we going to do with that gift?

I’m going to remember this terrible week of illness. Not because I haven’t been this sick in years but because it’s a good reminder that everyday is a gift from the Lord. The next time I feel lazy about working out, walking the dogs, or doing anything productive I want to remember this week that was lost to sickness and say to myself, “Do it now or you might not be able to do it later, jerkface!!!” That’s good advice.

The Voyage of the Dawn Jammer

2010-12-02T19:46:00.000-08:00

I have to admit, the title cracks me up. Having just finished the book and with the movie coming out next month, I couldn’t resist. I thought the book was okay. In any Narnia book by C.S. Lewis you simply have to recognize the symbolism. There were plenty in “The Voyage of the Dawn Treader,” although, referring to the books, I enjoyed “The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe"” and “Prince Caspian" much better.

In any case, I didn’t really want to talk about the book or the movie (although I plan to see it once it hits the dollar show). I wanted to talk about a discussion we had at my Grace Group (Home Bible Study) last night.

Kenny Clark preached this past week and used an analogy of the rearview mirror, symbolizing the things Jesus saved us from, and the windshield, symbolizing the things Jesus saved us for. We actually took that analogy and each of us started writing down the things Jesus saved us from and what Jesus saved us for.

As you could imagine, the list on my rearview mirror was quite extensive. Actually, it didn’t even fit (although I did have a small piece of paper). Some of the people in my Grace Group became Christians when they were young children and can’t even imagine life without Christ, which I think is a beautiful testimony. Since I became a Christian in high school and didn’t really feel the affects until late high school, I could easily envision my life without Christ as it was.

My rearview mirror had in it things like, self, bitterness, depression, meaningless, bad company, bad girlfriend(s), bad relationships and an extremely destructive lifestyle of complete indulgence. Picture the parable of the Prodigal Son but the son never returning to his father. Yes, that would be me. It was a little depressing thinking about it. Although I’m thankful Jesus saved me from that road, it still weighs heavily on my soul to think about those days and what easily “could’ve been” (details notwithstanding).

However, once I started on the windshield portion of the exercise, I began listing what Jesus saved me “for,” which was no surprise, a complete contrast with what He saved me “from.” Namely, He saved me for service to others, peace, joy, purpose, amazing brother-like friends, an amazing wife, a productive member of the community of the redeemed, and a life-style that honors Him (sometimes anyway).

I wanted to take the analogy further and say that we (Christians) are headed towards the Kingdom of God. The closer we get to that destination the more things make sense to us. Also, the closer we get to the Kingdom, the smaller our past sins (and even our present ones) seem to be in the rearview mirror. The vehicle is the church and the fuel is the Holy Spirit (we’re not meant to ride alone). If we focus too much on our past we could stray off course. If we don’t check our rearview once in a while, old vices could sneak back up on us.

Furthermore, it’s Jesus who is doing the driving. We often think we’re driving, however, “a man makes his plan but the Lord directs his steps.” We get in trouble when we try and take the wheel. This analogy gets me excited about the journey.

In the book “The Voyage of the Dawn Treader,” the focus is as much on the journey as it is on the end goal. I’m enjoying my “Voyage of the Dawn Jammer” (this still cracks me up). There are certainly some rough patches along the way but that only makes for a more interesting book.

Here's the trailer of the movie for kicks:

Thankfulness For Thanksgiving

2010-11-18T22:28:00.000-08:00

As I was thinking about starting new holiday traditions I thought it would be good to write down all the things I’m thankful for this Thanksgiving. During this time of year, I often think about things to be thankful for but actually writing them down and being more reflective might have more of a lasting impact than just thinking about them passively. So lets get started, shall we? In no particular order (except for #1, thanks to the wife who is editing this):

The wife: I love my wife to no end. That’s why I tolerated painting the new house despite the fact that I don’t like painting (more on this in another blog later). I couldn’t ask for a better wife. She’s beautiful AND smart. Which is obviously important because I can be an idiot most of the time. Basically, she’s a perfect fit for me. That’s not to say we don’t have our disagreements every now and then but you just have to ask yourself, “Who else do I want to work out issues with?” Answer? No one.

In addition, there is also the person(s) I didn't end up with. My buddy Dom and I were discussing how thankful we were of who we didn't end up with when considering all the ex-girlfriends we've had and/or girls who simply rejected us when we were interested. Most of those girls have turned out crazy, quadrupled in size, or would've been terrible fit(s). I guess God does really know what He's doing when providing a wife. Speaking of the wife…

The wife’s family: A few years ago during our communion service at church, one of our pastors asked my father-in-law (aka The Big Boss Man) “How does it feel to have your daughter engaged to Junior?” My father-in-law answered, “He’s an answer to prayer.” That’s right people; I’m an “answer to prayer.” Although I’m pretty sure when The Big Boss Man was praying for his daughter’s future husband he didn’t have a pot-smoking, D-average GPA(ing), street racing dude. It makes me wonder who Becky (the wife's sister) is going to end up with.

However, I’m not thankful for The Big Boss Man only for his free cable TV and his lovely daughter but also because he comes with a wife and therefore I also have a mother-in-law (aka The Mother-In-Law). Having lost my mother a few years ago, the holidays are typically tough. I remember my mom would always get me things that I liked regardless of whether they were healthy for me or not (e.g., Boxes of Snickers, Gatorade, and tons of other junk food). Interestingly, The Mother-In-Law brought home my favorite pie (Pumpkin) the other night and happily showed me knowing that I would destroy it shortly. (Speaking of which, what’s the over/under for full pumpkin pies I will destroy by myself this holiday season? 4.5? 5.5? Let’s settle on 5.0. I’m taking the over, easily.). It was a nice motherly touch that warms the heart.

In any case, being a part of a family has been great. Not only for the fellowship and bonding but also for a place to go watch cable TV without paying for it. I like not paying for stuff.

My Job: I’m grateful that God has provided a job in these hard times. Not everyone is blessed with a job and not everyone is blessed with a teacher’s schedule (e.g., weekends, holidays, and summers off). Yes there are times when I wonder if my students wake up in the morning and say, “What can I do to drive Mr. J up the wall?” Overall, it’s been a good year. The students are learning and they’re growing as little human beings. This isn’t my ideal job but it’s where the Lord currently has me so I’ll continue to put forth my best effort (or at least pretend like I am).

New NBA Season: Need I say more?

Friends: I love these guys. Except Bryan of course.

Church: Before I began attending my church regularly, two of the pastors were already investing into my life during my time at Biola University. They never really had any expectation for me to even start attending their church either. After graduating grad school, the transition made sense. I can’t begin to tell you the amount of healing that’s taken place in my life from past hurts because of the pastors at my church and other members as well. I feel myself getting emotional even as I type this so lets move on.

Food: People who know me well know that I have an unorthodox way of describing good food. I won’t mention how I describe good food here because I would get an earful from the wife (and for good reason). Anyway, I love good food. That doesn’t always mean it’s healthy but I just loooooovvvvvvveeeeeee good food. Since it’s the holiday season families get together and eat tons of good food. The other night I told the wife that when I retire I wanted to take a bath in whip cream. I also want a bowl of strawberries on the side to dip in the bathtub with angel food cake as my pillow. How awesome would that be!?! That’s how much I love food.

It’s the little things in life that you have to be grateful for as well. Food has to be at the top of my list of things we don’t think about that often but make life so much more enjoyable. Speaking of the little things . . .

My Car: I have a 97’ Ford Explorer. I bought it brand new. It is far from brand new now but it’s lasted longer than Hitler’s reign. On my way to night class the other day, however, I was on the freeway going about 65mph and the front left tire decided that it had enough of life and exploded (If you’re not a cop reading this then it was more like 75mph). I guess I’m thankful that I’m still alive.

All the things I’ve mentioned come with the understanding that God is the provider of all these things. Acknowledging that fact is good but living it out in personal holiness and generosity towards others is the ultimate “Thank You” to God.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

November Rain

2010-11-09T17:07:00.000-08:00

Is it November already? Is it early or something? In any case, this November seems a little different than other Novembers in the past. Don’t get me wrong; I’m still excited about the annual release of McDonald’s McRib(s). I’m also excited about the beginning of a new basketball season (4th season as a season ticket holder).

But what makes this November seem a little different to me is a story I shared with a friend from my Grace Group (small home bible study). First let me give some background. I grew up in a broken home without any real assembles of family tradition. The holidays were always miserable to me because it felt like a time when my family were forced to be together when we didn’t really want to be. As I got older the holidays got worst and more depressing.

When I started attending Biola University, it signaled a new season of my life. I had met friends who are closer to me than brothers. My buddy Aaron Brown invited me to the Christmas tree lighting event that Biola holds every year on campus. He was always trying to talk me out of having such a negative attitude towards the holidays. Since I didn't have anything else better to do I decided to go. So there I was with my friends all bundled up, each having their own cup of warm apple cider waiting with child-like anticipation for the lighting of the Christmas tree. Once the tree was lit, I remember having a “There is something right about this” moment and realized that this is what the holidays was suppose to be about. I never shared that story until a couple nights ago. And only now do I realize the significance of it.

It feels great that I could reflect on the painful past and see that God does indeed “turn ashes into beauty.”

Now that I married into an All-American family, I feel ready for make the most out of the holiday season. The wife already said that she wants a “real” Christmas tree this year but that sounds like a lot of work. Not to mention that a fake tree is cheaper, last longer, and is a lot less messy. On the other hand, maybe starting a new era that deeply appreciates the holiday season with a “real” tree would be a good symbol (Of course I say that now but once I’m dragging one into the house I’ll be regretting it).

PS - Thanks Aaron for inviting me that night. Good times.

Buddy’s new buddy

2010-10-29T18:17:00.000-07:00

If you remember, my wife wanted a dog. I repeat; my wife wanted “a” dog. Doesn’t the indefinite article “a” mean only one? It certainly implies it, right? I wanted zero dogs, and I made that abundantly clear. The reason being is that I don’t want to put in the work to take care of them. I would rather be wasting my time doing something completely unproductive like trying to get a new high score on Bejeweled.

Anyway, since we got Buddy it has been quite the ride. He’s a playful dog that never barks and is eager to please. Yes I have to walk him every now and then when the wife is busy. I usually just download some John Piper sermons on my iPod and listen to them while I walk the dog. Of course there are those moments that make my blood boil when he’s Exorcist vomiting all over the house, sleeping on the couch, or runs off into the street chasing cats. Not to mention all of the dog food and dog toys we’ve spent money on to keep him alive and happy. I’m not exactly sure if I’d spend this much effort on my own children.

My brother-in-law PJ is being stationed, with his family, in Guam for the next three years. They have a dog (a Boxer) name Samson. They don’t really want to take him on a sixteen-hour flight. Also, in the event that PJ gets called to active duty it would be easier for Ally, his wife, to travel back to the states with only the kids.

Interestingly, my wife approached me recently and said, “Honey, would you want to take Samson for PJ and Ally?” My reply, “Why? I don’t even want our dog.” She responded, “Because they’ve had him since he was a puppy and he was a gift from Ally’s parents (Her dad passed away from cancer not three years ago.). I’m sure it would mean a lot to PJ and Ally if they knew Samson would be taken care of but no pressure. If you don’t want to take him it’s okay.” I thought to myself, “How is that ‘No Pressure?’” My wife should’ve just said, “Honey, you need to take Samson because you’ll look like an A-hole if you don’t.” Fair enough. Although I’m not sure how I got duped into getting two dogs when I didn’t want either one.

I knew that my only escape was going to be that Samson and Buddy wouldn’t get along and they’d try and kill each other. So before committing to a second dog, we decide to have a “road test” by letting Samson stay with us for the week. I just kept thinking, “double the dog food and double the dog feces to pick up. Wonderful, more work.” Truthfully, I was holding out hope that they wouldn’t get along, so I would feel better not taking in Samson.

At first there was hope on that front. Samson decided to pee in Buddy’s food bowl in an attempt to assert himself as the alpha dog. Samson even drank out of the toilet. I told the wife, “See, Buddy’s only going to pick up bad habits from Samson.” Furthermore, we recently got Buddy to stop sleeping on the couch (or so we think). Guess who’s sleeping on the couch now? That’s right, Samson. This is looking promising.

However, things started taking a turn for the worst. The wife started walking them together. No problems. They actually run well together. Interestingly, they even have their sides picked out. They like to be next to each other, but Buddy runs on the right side closest to the wife and Samson runs on the left. If they ever get tangled up or crisscrossed, they can’t continue walking until each one is on the correct side. It’s if as though they made an arrangement. Not only that, but while they’re in the house they wrestle like a couple of brothers quite frequently. When they’re out of breath they both stop, look at each other and agree it’s time for a water break. Then they both happily stroll to the same water bowl and drink out of it like a couple of horses out of a trough. As it turns out, . . . you guessed it . . . they get along. As a result, we now have two dogs. Interesting how life turns out sometimes. Of course I told my wife that if we take a second dog we’d have to put off kids even further. She didn’t buy it. Great. At least the weekend is here.